Thursday, November 11, 2010

He Said...She Said

It's Thursday so it's time for another episode of He Said...She Said, where Schmoop and I take turns responding to each other via the magic of Microsoft Word.

Let's get jiggy with it, Chuckleheads...

Schmoop: I’m feeling sappy tonight, wanna be sappy with me, well do ya punk??

Matt: I just wanna make Hamburger Stuffing.

Schmoop: Considering I just woke you up from an hour and a half “nap”, I would think you would have something else to say? Maybe…………

Matt: Maybe like what..? I Love you?

Schmoop: I Love YOU Sparky!!! Hearts, and Flowers…Ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwww. Anyoo, I do love you. Now, let’s get naked. Oh wait a minute, I’m always naked.

Matt: Holy Cow!! You haven’t called me Sparky in years.

Schmoop: You started calling me Sparky when we first met, if you recall. Now you call me Schmoop. Sparky reminds me of our first date….

Matt: Date? You hopped on topped of me and said, “Don’t move.” And every time I did, you yelled at me, “DON’T MOVE!!” Rowwwwr.

Schmoop: You know…..Alright you are correct, but I thought it was a date. I’ve never had one. I told you not to move because, well…..

Matt: Because what? Was I moving too much? You never said anything…you should have said something…

Schmoop: Ok, you ass, you are the first man to ever give me an orgasm. Are you happy now? Buttmmunch. Notice, I said Man. J/K

Matt: I do have a talent and it sure isn’t ’cause I’m huge. I’m just hugely cool…and well, terrific.

Schmoop: God, you are so full of yourself. Yes, you do have a MAJOR talent in that area, and in ALL areas. But….I’m bendy.

Matt: Oh you’re bendy, alright. Holy Cow!!

Schmoop: Ha! I just hope you love me the way I love you., and me alone. Now, I will be naked on the, davenport, oh I’m sorry, Lilly (with the burn hole), dinner smells good...pictures!!

Matt: You really need to lighten up, you…But I understand. I love you and I will take a picture of the Hamburger Stuffing.

Schmoop: Ok...get me a beer, would ya? Please.



And there you have it. Another award winning installment of He Said...She Said.

Off to take Schmoop to work and Ryno to school.

See ya soon and thank you to those of you who contributed to Matt-Man's Hump Day Adventure yesterday.

It was fun and funny, although it was hard keeping myself from commenting!!


Cheers!!

19 comments:

Doc said...

You and Schmoop are hilarious... I woudl love to see you two in action someday... (not that kind of action) you know what I mean.

MysteryChick said...

You two are like George and Gracie, only r-rated.

Matt-Man said...

Doc: You can catch us twice nightly at 7 and 9 PM at Stan's Dinner Theatre and Car Wash in Bagwine, Ohio. Cheers Doc!!

Chick: I was thinking more like Fred and Ethel Mertz. Cheers Hot Stuff!!

Raquel's World said...

Awww her first orgasm..that is so special. <3

Matt-Man said...

Raquel: It is a fact of which I am very proud. Cheers Roc!!

Knight said...

DON'T MOVE! If I had a nickel.

What is on that plate? Is that the moose turd pie that came up yesterday?

Matt-Man said...

Knight: Ha. No. It's Hamburger Stuffing and it is AWESOME. God that shit is good. Cheeers Knight!!

Nipsy Bondo said...

Knight stole my schtick...

Matt-Man said...

P-Man: Lucky You. Cheers P-Man!!

Dana said...

Why did I just get an image of Gumby and Pokey while reading that exchange??

Matt-Man said...

Dana: Ha!! Not bad. Cheers Dana!!

Mike said...

Lilly's got a burn hole already? From hot sex maybe?

Beth said...

God we're good!!! Hey did you save me any of that fantastic dinner, or are we having hard toast???

Dianne said...

this post really made me want some meat ...

and some dinner too

Matt-Man said...

Mike: I wish I could say yes to that but it was because I dropped my smoke. I feel much shame. Cheers Mike!!

Schmoop: There is plenty left, but you have to come thorugh me to get it. Come on, come through me. Cheers and Zooooooooves!!

Matt-Man said...

Di: You better have your Jewish hotness ready when we interview you tomorrow night. Cheers Sexy!!

Scott Oglesby said...

Your food always sounds (and looks) so gross. But I know for a fact that it tastes better than anyone (who didn’t grow up poor, like I did) would ever expect.

Funny ass convo!!

Matt-Man said...

Scott: Indeed!! It doesn't always look good, but man oh man, some of the shit I make is goooooood. Cheers Scott!!

You can Call me AL said...

First Orgasm....

There I was....All alone.....