Jessica Alba Naked: Rise of the Flesh Toned Surfboard

From now until Saturday, I will be putting up stories from the Bagwine vault. I felt this a perfect way to end year number four of Bagwine Ruminations and begin year number five which amazingly begins on Sunday May 23rd. Wow.

Here's one from June 18, 2007...

The new Fantastic 4 movie really cleaned up at the Box Office this weekend. I haven’t seen it yet but I do really love one of the characters, The Invisible Woman.

Yes I am a shallow man, but my affection for the character is purely due to masturbation purposes creative respect. I think Jessica Alba through her theatrical genius, has captured the essence of this particular superhero.

I must admit however, that I spend hours on end thinking about the fun I could have with the Invisible Woman.

I even had a dream about her the other night.

She came over and we started drinking some Wild Irish Rose.

We sat on the couch and she began to rub her form fitting superhero suit up against me. We put down our drinks and she straddled me as I sat on the couch.

She put her lips to mine and then proceeded to tickle my uvula with her super tongue. She kissed my neck, I opened my eyes, and there on the TV was a one-eyed toucan singing a reggae version of “I’m Turning Japanese.”

She stood up, took my hand and said, “Let’s go to bed.”

Once in bed, we laid down next to each other completely nekkid. After a few pecks and licks, she whispered in my ear, “Get kinky Matt-Man; do me while I’m invisible.”

I said, “Okay, but how will I find everything?” Jessica…er…The Invisble Woman said, “You’ll do fine, after all, you’re Matt-Man, Bitch!!”

When she said that, I didn’t know what turned me on more, that I was in bed with a gorgeous superhero, or the fact that she obviously reads my blog!!

Anyway, she went all invisible on me and I began the search and seizure mission. It did not start out well. I spent the first ten seconds French kissing her left eye.

I then moved on to kiss and caress her super breasts which oddly had no nipples. It was then I realized that I was sucking on her kneecaps.

I took a minute to sit up and analyze the shape and position of how her body was sunk into the bed. I studied and then hopped where I thought I would be in position for some good lovin’.

When I landed she said, “Oooooo good job Matt-Man.”

Passionately yet gently, I began to make love to her, or as I romantically refer to it, “began to plant the spud in the mud”.

Either the Enzyte I had been taking was adding the size it guaranteed or this was the tightest hoo-ha I had ever come across.

I was nearing the moment of climax when I moaned a super moan, and she laughed a super laugh.

Lying beneath me laughing…she became visible.

I looked down and discovered the source of her amusement. I had just spent the last two minutes fucking the hell out of her belly button. The mood had been shattered.

But then, she said to me…

“It’s okay Matt-Man. I’ll stop by tomorrow and go see the movie with you. You can freak everyone out at the theatre by making out with me while I’m invisible. Just be ready to be called Pee-Wee Matt-Man. Ciao baby!!”

I hope this entry will help you to think of me when you view this fine movie which I have never seen.

Cheers!!