Tuesday, January 23, 2007

Son...You Make Me Sooooo Proud!!

Using my wealth of medical knowledge I have upgraded my condition from poor to not too freaking bad. I think my spirits got a boost when I found that the torch has been passed from me to my son. He is going to be in a talent show Wednesday at his school. It is part of a Spaghetti Dinner/Talent Show that will be raising funds for the eighth graders to go to D.C. Ryno is only in the sixth grade, but he is selfless…well and he likes the spotlight. A trait that he inherited from God only knows!!

Anyway, this school is a private non-denominational Christian school (mother’s and Grandmother’s doing, but he really digs it there). So while most acts will involve a rendition of the singing of “Wind Beneath My Wings” or a Happy Hands Club interpretation of the “Lord’s Prayer”, my son will be dressed as a Professor doing his “Profiles in History”. Through the brilliant lyrics of the great Tom Lehrer he will sing about the life of a true “American” hero…I offer you the words that my son will be uttering:


“And what was it that put America in the forefront of the nuclear nations? And what was it that made it possible to spend twenty billion dollars of your money to put some clown on the moon? Well, it was good old American know how, that's what, as provided by good old Americans like Dr. Wernher von Braun!

Gather 'round while I sing you of Wernher von Braun,

A man whose allegiance
Is ruled by expedience.
Call him a Nazi, he won't even frown,
"Ha, Nazi, Schmazi," says Wernher von Braun.

Don't say that he's hypocritical,
Say rather that he's apolitical.
"Once the rockets are up,
who cares where they come down?
That's not my department," says Wernher von Braun.

Some have harsh words for this man of renown,
But some think our attitude
Should be one of gratitude,
Like the widows and cripples in old London town,
Who owe their large pensions to Wernher von Braun.

You too may be a big hero,
Once you've learned to count backwards to zero.
"In German or English
I know how to count down,
Und I'm learning Chinese!" says Wernher von Braun.”

Lyrics by Tom Lehrer (Copied and Pasted Without Any Permission Whatsoever)

You cannot imagine the joy in my heart when my son decided to do this number. The legacy continues. Bravo little man…Bravo!!

One funny thing I saw on the news yesterday while I was wallowing in physical distress. The Israeli government announced the name of their new top General. If I was an Israeli, more specifically a Jew, I would be quite worried. Check out the last four letters of his last name and you’ll know why: Gabi Ashkenazi….D’oh!!

I will be back later today with a few thoughts on the President’s State of the Union address that will be broadcast tonight at 9:00 P.M. EST. Until then, Cheers!!

19 comments:

Mo and The Purries said...

Good for the squirt! Ryno sounds like a chip off the old block.

And I'm still laughing about the Happy Hands Club rendition of the Lord's Prayer for Talent Show! Ha!

Are you SERIOUS about the new Israeli General? Ashkenazi??? As in Ask A Nazi?!? Wow.

That would be like a Democrat presidential candidate named Ima NuddaDubya.

Cheers,
mo

Schmoop said...

Ha...Good One...Yep Mo, that's the dude's name. Oh how I do love irony so.

Odat said...

Sounds like a great kid...you taught him well.....
Glad you're feeling a bit better!
Peace

Schmoop said...

He's a funny funny little guy. And thanks odat, I feel MUCH better!!

Natalia said...

I do hope you feel better soon. And congrats to your son. That is some cool stuff.

-N

Anonymous said...

Vulva on my mind....

Schmoop said...

Hiya Nat....feeling spiffy now, thanks.

Joe: Did you lose your meds again? If so, try that peyote that I sent to you.

Vinny "Bond" Marini said...

MATT-MAN: What a great song for him to sing.. and does the advisor running this talent show know his selection? Knowing the world today, i am surprised they would let him...

Glad you are feeling partially better...was it the beer bong I prescribed that helped?

Schmoop said...

Ha....You do raise an interesting question...They will be reviewing who is doing what tomorrow!! And yes Bond, thanks for the scrip'...I'll have it refilled soon. Cheers!!

Unknown said...

That's awesome! Maybe next year he can do the Elements song. LOL Or maybe Poisoning Pigeons in the Park. ;)

Schmoop said...

It's only awesome if they let him do it!! I thought maybe he could do "The Vatican Rag" for the Pope!!

Liz Hill said...

That is too funny! Do you think they'll really listen? LOLOL

Glad you feel better Matty

Schmoop said...

I'm guessing most people wont even know who the hell Wernher von Braun is. But the boy does a mean rendition...And Thanks

Lizza said...

Oh, wow. He's a non-conformist! Cooool.

So glad you're feeling better, Matt.

Schmoop said...

He is indeed Lizza, and thanks!!

Desert Songbird said...

Like father like son. No wonder you are so proud!

Glad you're among the humans again, Matty me boy. Would miss you too much if you were gone long.

Mwah!

Schmoop said...

Yeah he's like his father alright, many times to the chagrin of his mother. A big ol' wet smooch right back at ya!!

Cheesy said...

Keeping my fingers crossed that they allow him to do his bit... but... does he have a back-up plan? I think you should video tape it!

Schmoop said...

Hiya Cheesy we shall find out today...It will of course be video taped.