It’s Stream of Consciousness Friiiiiiiiiiiiiday so drag me through the mud and call me Wanda. Let’s go down to the lobby and get ourselves a treat. I wonder who is stranger, the late Anna Nicole or the judge who heard her decaying corpse case. Whewwwww what a freak-a-zoid. Where’s Judge Judy when you need her? Judy Jetson was HOT!! She had a nice set of satellites. I am splurging tonight I tell ya. Fish Sticks and peas!! I caught a huge carp a couple of years ago. That thing had bigger lips than Lisa Renna.Modulation…Modulation…Modulation. What? Hoochie Momma. When Prince Harry deploys to Iraq will he wear a British uniform or an SS Panzer Leader uniform? Harry Rommel…works for me. My 12 year old son has the hots for Maria Sharapova. He said that she is a good looking Russian woman. I think that’s the first time I’ve ever heard the phrases “good looking” and “Russian woman” in the same sentence. My son wants to shave his head. Does that mean that he needs to go into rehab?
Cramp in the foot…cramp in the foot…SOB…hold on. Pain is gone. Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I shall fear no Big Mac. I like soup. Is Soupy Sales still alive? I am going to have to Google that. Gimme a second. Holy crap the dude is still alive and is 81 years old. Go figure. I always cry when I hear the Bee Gees singing “How Deep is Your Love”, not because it’s a syrupy love song, but because it reminds me of my phallic inadequacies. Why couldn’t Karen Carpenter sell her house? Because it didn’t have a kitchen...ha…A classic.
Did Noah have floodlights on his Ark? They swam and they swam all over the dam. I wonder what Charlie Brown’s teacher looked like. My second grade teacher, Mrs. Thomas, was smokin’ hot. I used to act up hoping that she would spank me. Schmoop and I caught a couple of Three Stooges episodes the other day. They still crack me up. Pretty impressive for a trio of dead people. I could go for a Sausage Cheese McMuffin right now. But I will stay strong. I will remain stronger than the smell that lurks between Bill O’Reilly’s ass and nutsack. Taint that reassuring?
Have a wonderful weekend everybody. Spend it doing something that you rarely do. In my case, I am going to take a shower. Cheers!!
32 comments:
Matt you have to come to London and see the Russian Mistresses shop. Otherwise go on google and look up one of the Russian bride sites. That is one country full of beautiful women.
Charlie Brown's teacher is better never seen. The mind's eye is always better than the real ones.
May we call you Wanda from now on?
Ever wonder why dead celebrities get so much attention?
And the image of that spot of Billy O'Reilly's body is foul.
Take a shower and have a good weekend!
I'll do some googling Boy. But I bet some of those brides do some significant aging during shipment!!
If you want to Mo, have at it. And by the way, I took a shower shortly after typing that O'Reilly remark.
Wait...wasnt Mrs. Thomas like 65?
You sick bastard. ;)
Steve~
Not at all, but back then it seemed like that was her cup size Steve.
I was chuckling throughout but really laughed out loud at the "Taint that reassuring?" part. hahahahaha!!
The one thing that kind of bugs me about SoC Friday is that there are some things you write about that I'd like for you to elaborate upon and then you jump to the next subject! Grrrr!!! I'm an impatient girl. ;)
Well let me know which one's you want elaborated upon and I will...well elaborate on them. Allie, are you always so in to instant gratification!? Because it usually only takes me 45-60 seconds to...I'll be there in a minute!! Sheesh.
Aww your son wants to be just like you...isn't that cute! or is it???
I should tease you with the smell of the sauce and meatballs I'm cooking, but I won't! Have a wonderful meatless weekend!
Peace
It is very cute...I was actually touched. Meatballs are on of my faves. We usually have them every weekend while watching some sports. Dear God how I will miss them. Have a good weekend too odat. I am off to sob.
Phallic inadequacies? LOL. OK, too much imagery here now. ;-)
Have a great shower, Matt-man! (and a great weekend)
I will indeed enjoy my shower Lizza, and if you're i the neighborhood feel free to join me and check out my phallic inadequacies...Have a good one!!
Ever make Spam meatballs, Wanda? And do you have to inflict the torture on us of the olifactory grotesquery of any part of Cheney's gentialia just because you are using that image to be meatless?
Recapping, the judge in the ANS trial is a homosexual nazi lover of Prince henry, and they have threesomes with Judy Jetson.
Maria Sharapova is going to shave 81-year old Soupy Sales Taint as she whispers the words to "how deep is your love" in his ear and your son will be watching this all happen from an ark.
Charlie Brown and the Three Stooges used to take it to your 2nd grade teacher, Mrs. Thomas, while you and Schmoop spanked each other.
Finally Bill O'Reilly's ass smells like a Sausage Cheese McMuffin but you are going to give him a shower to take care of that.
How'd i do???
SPAM-Balls...Brilliant!! I was talking about O'Reilly, does TB have Dickie-Boy on the mind!? You want him, dontcha!?
Thats just good stuff matt-man!!I would have been here earlier but had a bad case of need to sleep in (ohh my head to much Budweiser)hang on matt-man and have a great weekend!
Holy Shit Bond...LOL...Quit showing me up!! Too funny, drink some Jack this weekend, I'll drink some Rose and we can get shit-faced in two different time zones. Cheers!!
Hey there Roger...Nurse that head of yours so it's ready to drink more this weekend. Have a good one yourself my good man.
If Charlie Browns teacher looks anything like Calvin's teacher, you're better off not knowing, darlin'...that's the stuff of nightmares.
Have a super duper meat-free weekend (she says as reminds herself to defrost the chicken for roasting and adds a pack of rump steak and a smoked ham to the Saturday shopping list....nyaa nyaa nyaa...)
:0)
Thanks for the tip Wendz. You have a wunnerful weekend yourself, and if your evil mentioning of meat to me is any indication of how you operate, enjoy kicking some puppies this weekend ; )
Dear Wanda:
I laughed out loud at the Karen Carpenter joke. Is that wrong?
Charlie Brown's teacher was named "Miss Othmar." Just a bit of useless trivia for you there.
Sausage cheese McMuffins are so awesome... yum. I bet you could easily make a vegetarian version of it, though... there really is such a thing as soy-based breakfast sausage patties. (I've seen them in stores! Morningstar Farms is the brand, I think). So just buy some English muffins, a package of cheese slices, some of the pseudo-sausage, and make yourself a treat!
Holy shit bat man....you're just all over the place with your blog today. I can say one thing....I am SO sick of hearing about Anna Nicole Smith. Bury her in the Bahamas already and get over it!
Oh yeah...TGIF
Pseudo Sausage would be like cheating the Lord. I must repent. That was a good piece of trivia Janna. I like trivia. it's so trivial. My nose itches. Have a good weekend. weekends were made for Michelob.
Have a good one Jillie...But the ANS stuff is far from over. I have a picture of her and I partying 2 hours before I impregnated her. I will post it next week. Cheers!!
Hey you know...I wonder how many people are going to jump in on the band wagon saying "I'm the dad" just to make it even MORE outlandish than it already is. Hmmm...maybe I'll tell them I'M the daddy!!! LMAO!
Now that was a waste of some good booze. It spewed all over my computer - that's gonna stain dammit.
Now it's leaking out my eyes!
I gotta remember the rules - no drinking while reading the stream.
JD burns like a mo-fo when it snorts out your nostrils.
Hi Meatless-Matt! Hope your having a good weekend. Does Sweetman have a game on? BTW how was the new WIR flavour?
AH damn Matt-Man.. it is just the atmosphere here... sipping the Jack as I type
hola~
i personally do not take stories in Genesis(not only this book)verbatim. For example,it says that the world was created in 7 days. 7 is just a number viewed upon as sacred at that time when the book was written.
Neither do i believe in the story of Noah's Ark (even Adam and Eve) word per word. I believe there is a strong message to each story although set in a methaphorical structure.
..St. Augustine came from God and so does his teachings, guided by the Holy Spirit sent by the Father himself. I find it fascinating that you observe Catholic teachings (such as abstaining for Lent), because you believe in St. Augustine's teachings.
p/s: i gave up tidbits. dunno how long that will last! :)
I don't think your son has to go into rehab yet, but if he starts singing "Oops I did it again" I would start worrying...
Great blog & I like your thumbnail.
Rarely take showers huh? Well then I'll take a bath since I don't do that often. Hope you had a great weekend and even better week.
Maybe you are Jillie, maybe you are.
Sorry about that Trav. I hate to waste good booze myself.
Good job Bond...Enjoy the Jack.
Good to see you Mags...Good Luck with the tid bits. I have always enjoyed Augustine and Lent. Maybe from the influence of two of my Aunts who are Nuns!! Cheers...
Raven, if I hear him singing ANY BS songs I will be very disturbed.
Hey there tkk, thanks for stopping by, Cheers!!
Hi Carmen, hope evrything is okay with you...Enjoy the bath!!
Oops missed ya Eyechan. My son's season is over...He got better every game which is cool. As for the Apple Rose I keep forgettig to get it!!
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