Streaming Friday!!

It’s Stream of Consciousness Friiiiiiiiiday so put my worm on a hook and cast me upon the waters, ‘cause I’m going fishing. Woop Woop, yep Schmoop’s brother Dave and I are headed out this morning for a little angling enjoyment. Oh there will be plenty of pictures to post taken during our manly Memorial Day Weekend fishing expedition. Do Do didum didum whaddum choo!! And they swam and they swam all under the dam.

Memorial Day weekend is a great time. It’s the unofficial start to the summer here in the States. People will be cooking brats and burgers on the grill, drinking beer, watching parades, and all of the trailer parks will experience a ginormous spike in domestic violence calls. God Bless America. I wonder if President Bush realizes that his most measurable accomplishment is greatly increasing the number of fallen soldiers to be memorialized? What a moron. Koo-Koo. We had to break down and turn on the air conditioner. It got so hot in here my balls were sweating more than Rosie O’Donnell running six blocks to a free all-you-can eat chicken buffet. That’s a lot of sweat folks!! I have a slight toothache. Zooomba.

Hell, it has gotten so warm here that I saw a dog chasing a rabbit and they were both walking. Ba dump bump. My son left for St. Louis at 4 AM this morning. His mom is driving him, his grandma, and grandpa. He told me yesterday that he was going to stay up all night so he could sleep through the trip and not have to listen to Grandma complain about his mom’s driving. That is one smart 12 year old. I may finally quit smoking. This morning I hacked up something that looked like a half a dozen sardines in mustard sauce…disgusting yes, yet I was compelled to stare upon it.

My wrist itches. What does that mean? What would you call a pirate who has his own website? A Blarrrrrrrrger. Bwahahaha that wasn’t too bad. I could go for some corned beef hash. I need some more java, be right back. Ahhhhhh. Poor Schmoop, this time every month she finds out just how fertile she still is. It’s tough on her but it does put an end to my pathetic sex begging for a few days. I burnt my finger last night while cooking some pork chops for her. Wild Irish Rose and culinary arts don’t mix too well. The chops came out pretty well though. Bon Apetit!! I love bacon.

I am a bit gassy this morning. I am glad I don’t have to pay for it. Prices are out of control. I bet Wild Irish Rose could power a car. But it would probably swerve all over the place. Scratch that idea. Speaking of scratching…..ahhhhh that felt great!! You know what’s sad? When I die, my organs will be of no use to anyone. Veni Vidi Wee Wee….I came, I saw, I took a leak. Well folks, I need to do some work on my pole, so I must be off.

Have a great long weekend. Spend it eating good greasy grilled food and dipping your worm a time or two. Cheers!!