Streaming Friday!!

It’s Stream of Consciousness Friiiiiiiiiday so dress me as a French Maid and put a feather duster up my butt because I have to clean the Bagwine digs today. I clean the joint every Friday and today is no different. I am also making up Taco Burgers for tonight’s repast.

Yep, that’s me, a cleaning and cooking machine. Of course, it helps when one “is between jobs”. Yeah, that’s what I’ll call it.

I made butterflied chicken stuffed with cheese and spinach the other night. I should have taken a picture of it. I also made my own sauce for it and served it on a bed of noodles. Holy Crap, next thing you know I’ll be alphabetizing the canned goods!! Anyone wanna trade me their soup coupons for a coupon worth $1.50 off of Always Panty Liners? I’ve tried them but my hemorrhoids bleed right through them. So…

I was watching Bill O’Reilly last night and he was showing the video of where his lackey was giving crap to Rosie O’Donnell for not appearing on Falafel Boy’s show. O’Reilly is so frickin’ full of himself. The TV tough guy always says that if people don’t come on his show it’s because they’re afraid to face him.

Well, I am throwing down the gauntlet and putting the same challenge to Billy. Let me interview you Bill-O and post it. If you decline, it proves that you are nothing but a big gurlie-man.

I will be emailing him today with my offer; you can help me by emailing him as well and either forward this post or just request that he answer a few questions from Bagwine Ruminations. His email address is oreilly@foxnews.com. Okay enough of that, let’s talk about something more substantive…My toenails need trimmed. Any volunteers?

I was given a Community Blogger Award from Bagwine buddy, Dixie. I appreciate it but it makes me wonder what kind of community she lives in. Based upon her award, I guess I should start up a new blog, “Mr. Matt-Man’s Neighborhood”. Hi kids, welcome to my home, I drink Bagwine. Can you say cirrhosis? Now kids, say hi to my friend Suzy. She’s made of latex…Can you say latex? The nice thing about Suzy is that her mouth is always open, but she never speaks. Kids, I bet if you ask your daddy, he will tell you that he has a girl just like her too.

My left wrist is killing me. I woke up last Sunday and it hurt and a few days later it is still annoying me. It hurts to pick things up and it is really hampering my personal sexual gratification. I would switch to using my right hand but I am not a bi-sexual. I’m all out of love; I’m so lost without you…Ay yi yi, Air Supply. Stink-O-Frickin’-Rama.

Well folks, it’s time to dam this stream up for this week. Enjoy your weekend. Spend it putting a panty liner on a blow-up doll. See ya ’round this weekend. Cheers!!