It’s a beautiful Sunday here in Bagwine, Ohio. Somewhat cloudy, but a high of 41, not bad at all for the first weekend of February.Today marks the start of a “Super Week”.
Today we have Super Bowl Sunday. Two days from now, it will be Super Tuesday.
And then follows, Super Ash Wednesday, followed Thursday by, the Super 43rd Annual Matt-Man Creation Celebration.
Friday we will party down during the Super 39th Annual Starrlight Slide Down the Birth Canal Party.
Wowzy wow wow!! Insert the word “Happy” prior to all of those “Supers” and I’d swear that I was living in Tokyo… “Super Happy Fun Week” to us all, and Konichiwa, Bitches!!
I just can’t get into the Super Bowl this year. I’m not a big fan of either the Giants or the Patriots. I’m even less of a fan of listening to 8 mind numbing hours of pre-game analysis.
Analysis, that almost always contains such gems as the following:
The Giants must try to put pressure on Tom Brady…Hmmmm, don’t most defenses try to put pressure on the Quarterback, any Quarterback?
The running game may be the key. If they can run on their defense, that will help…Really? I thought maybe the offenses were hoping to lose yardage on every running play. Silly Matt-Man.
They must be careful with the ball. You don’t want to fumble it away or throw an interception…That is a fucking brilliant observation Mr. Analyst…I didn’t realize that!!
This game could come down to a field goal…You’re kidding!!? That can happen in a football game? You my MIT graduate, are gifted indeed.
My wonderful Bagwine readers, there are only two things that you need to know about the game. The team that scores the most points will win.
And more importantly, you can’t spell “analyst” without “anal”…
Now please, let us bow our heads.
Father, give peace unto us all and strike down Terry Bradshaw with a severe case of laryngitis.
Lord, create a Halftime Show wardrobe malfunction allowing the old, shriveled up Rock ‘n’ Roll wanker of Tom Petty to be visible to the entire viewing audience. Disgusting yes, but quite a hoot nonetheless.
Your Holy Dudeness, smile down upon me today, and help me to put my pigskin into the End Zone. I really need to score.
To all of our petitions, Lord Hear our Prayer.
Amen, and Amen.
With that done, it is time for our Sunday Serenade. Today’s Disservice music comes to us in the form of the great Man in Black singing the incredible lyrics of Kris Kristofferson. Enjoy.
Cheers!!
NOTE: If the Super Bowl turns out to be less than Super, tune into Turnbaby’s BlogTalk Radio Show tonight at 8 EST. For details, click HERE.
37 comments:
I don't know if I can take all of that Super Happy Fun in one week! Whew! That really is asking a lot of your readers ...
Dana: It's gonna be rough. Muddling through all of this excitement is the best we can do. Cheers!!
I don't care much for the Giants, but I hope they somehow knock the smugness out of the Pats.
Johnny Cash - Jesus Christ...both with the initials JC, coincidence...I think not.
Tom Petty.... I'd still do him.
Jeff: Yeah, I will casually root for the G-Men as well just because they are the underdog.
Hmmmmmmm. Both do have those initials don't they? You may be on to something...What Would Johnny Do? Cheers!!
Leighann: I like Tom Petty alot. Maybe not in the same way that you do however. Cheers Hot Stuff!!
Here's hoping your pigskin finds a super happy endzone. (hey I notice you did not precede that with "super")
GO GIANTS!
Peace
Odat: You are so right, and the End Zone that I am thinking of is pretty damn Super. May your Giants play large. Cheers!!
Just get stoned Matt-Man so you don't feel alone. Have a great day. :)
I predict that the team that scores the most points will win the game.
I have successfully ignored ALL of the Super Bowl hype all week long. I won't tune in until 5:42 central when they kick-off. And if the Patriot get way out in front like I expect I'll turn it over to HGTV or the Food Network.
Sandee: I never feel alone. The voices in my head always keep me company. Cheers!!
Jay: Amen brother...If we're lucky the Food Newtork will air a live broadcast of Nigella completely nekkid. Cheers!!
Good luck getting in the ENDZONE! If she won't let you near the Endzone, try going though the defensive front first. I'll bet you'll find a super slippery seam for the pigskin. QB sneaks right up the middle works too!
Have a SUPER DAY!
Ya know I have never thought of it as the Sliding Down The Birth Canal Day kinda way. It's so water birth hippy granola. Of course mom kept saying "Far Out!" all during labor and they thought she was stoned. I am not convinced she wasn't. So it kinda works!
I totally agree on the pre game shit. The only way they could be less insightful is if they started saying thinks like "You have to breath to live!" That said, I am not a bit Giants fan either. I am a fan of anyone beating the Cheatriots. I swear they need an asterick in the books by this season.
Um...FUH DUH
And better the Petty Wang than the Janet Tittie. Atleast the Petty Want is attached to someone with talent!
Starrlight: Far Out!! "You have to live to breath." You nailed the nail on the head with that one. Are you listening Fox Sports and ESPN!?
And yes by golly, Tommy Boy is quite a bit more talented than Janet Jackass-son. Cheers!!
Al: Not a bad game plan. I can always run a down and in and then take it storng to the basket. wait...wrong sport. Either way, it will result in a score. Go Team!! Cheers!!
Pre-game/Post-game... I live for the day SOMEONE comes up with an original question instead of the same lame shit like "Hey, you just won a National Championship Game... How do you FEEL?" "Well, how the fuck do you THINK I feel, Terry? No, really. How? I'm probably gonna get laid. Enough said."
Desert Rat: Ha...I like you already. You forgot one thing however...
"Well, how the fuck do you THINK I feel, Terry? No, really. How? I'm probably gonna get laid...by your wife no less. Hahahahaha."
Thanks for stopping by, and Cheers!!
Exactly!
Desert Rat: Enjoy your Sunday. Cheers!!
I'm already cooking up a hundred or so "atomic" buffalo wings. In addition, I have a case of beer, chips and dip. I might actually watch the game, if I can tear myself away from the food. Who's playing again?
* I just realized "Bagwine" is where you live matt-man, not your drink preference.
Worm: Hey there madman. Yeah, we are stocked up pretty well here. So the game will be no more than background noise.
Bagwine is my fave drink and living in Bagwine is but a state of mind. Enjoy the wings. Cheers!!
Let's see, Terry Bradshaw, Tom Petty, pig skin, EndZone, the drive, the downs, the score, and super week.... hmmmm, interesting factors to make a 'super' week, none necessary to the others, yet, all with one goal in mind: the successful super score~ I like Tom Petty too, but, would not want to see him splayed in all that boney-ness, NOT~ Bradshaw obviously suffered too many concussions, the 'Pats are swollen beyond the measure of deliverance of their pride, like too much enhancement, it is a no contest game... yep, Mr. Prez hopeful, you are right on again... looking forward to the 'super' week meltdown...
Lyn: Bradshaw is a walking concussion. Too much enhancement? Are you saying that the Patriots are hooked on Enzyte and Viagra!!?
My meltdown will transpire Wednesday and beyond, when my 46 days of meatlessness begin. Oh the Humanity. Cheers!!
Thank you noble pastor for once more leading us to the light. That is my single favorite Kristopherson song, so this day is doubly blessed.
How was Ryno's Basketball excursion?
Jamie: Why thanks. That's fave by him as well. Kristofferson is a fantastic songwriter; he just needs to refrain from singing.
I talked to Ryno before they checked out this morning. He got some good autographs, had great food, and had a heck of an exciting time. Thanks for asking.
Cheers!!
I avoid all the junk that goes on before and after the game. And there will be times during the game when I'll turn off the sound.
Glad to hear that Ryno had a good time. Of course that was pretty much inevitable with the plethora of cool stuff he got to do.
Travis: I do the same. I'll have the game on, the sound down and listen to music while I watch.
Yeah, Ryno had a faboo time. He still failed to get that elusive Lebron James autograph dammit. Cheers and enjoy the game!!
I only watch the super bowl for the finger foods. I watch super tuesday because I'm terrified of the outcome.
108: Finger Food? Would that be a french dip? I know, I have no idea either. Cheers!!
That pass better be acurate,because my defense is on it!!
Happy Super Drunk day!!!
Schmoop: Well I am running a play action pass and spliting your coverage. Ha passes!! It's caught!! He SCORES!!!!! Loves...
Roger: Same to you. But I won't get drunk...
In my advanced years it takes everything I have to put a team on the field, if ya know what I mean. Cheers Buddy!!
So happy that someone wiped the smug off of Brady's face!
So, the Super Bowl was super. So was House, for that matter. Now I an going to open the door and see if the cat is ready to come in, sense the temp’s up to 50+ and he’s over-joyed to be playing outside.
Starr: Ha...Eli really stepped up at the end when needed. Cheers!!
Nick: Good to hear. Say hi to Alex fo rme. Cheers!!
Terry Bradshaw DID sound hoarse on the broadcast last night! Matty? What did you dooooooooo?.....
SOngbird: Ha....I noticed that. I am semi-powerful. Cheers!!
Post a Comment