When I came home from work yesterday ...From the day's mail, Schmoop handed me this package that had come from CVS Pharmacy, and she said to me, "Define Irony."
Whatever could be the irony within the contents?
Okay, what exactly fits? Wow, how did they know?
Nothing like receiving a uterine care package in the mail from your friendly CVS pharmacist...
Well since I was off last night, and the Schmoopster was feeling bad, I cooked something that I know she loves...BLT's.
I placed the bacon on a foiled pan and put it into a 450 Degree oven...
Schmoop and I decided to use buns instead of white bread...Yeah, we are rebels that way!!
The thick cut bacon came out minutes later in dandy, greasy form...
And here is how they came out when dressed...Yum-Frickin'-Oh!!
Have a great Tuesday all, and remember...Nirvana, is merely a Bagwine Fifth and a BLT away.
Cheers!!
Update 10:25 A.M.: The lovely Knight may be on to something when she commented that through CVS, the government is tracking the menstrual cycle of women. The following from my stat site:
Visitor Information:
(CVS PHARMACY INC) [Label Visitor]
Location:
WOONSOCKET, RHODE ISLAND, UNITED STATES (SGNS.NET)
Last Visit Time:
July 15, 2008 10:15:26 AM
Length of this Visit:
0 hours and 0 minutes
Page Viewed This Visit:
1
Returning Visits:
0
Entry Page:
http://bagwine.blogspot.com/2008/07/blood-clots-and-bacon.html
Exit Page:
http://bagwine.blogspot.com/2008/07/blood-clots-and-bacon.html
Referrer:
No referrer
54 comments:
And did you BOTHER to make me a BLT, bacon breath? Noooooooooo, you just flaunt it in front of me and think, "Nanner, nanner, nanner, I got this, and you didn't!"
Asshat.
Songbird: Not so fast my friend...Maybe I saved you one. Okay, I didn't; we ate them all, but you could have considered that scenario before your personal attack upon me. Cheers Dear!!
Yes, in fact, I DID consider that scenario. Then I considered the source, and decided, "Ha. NO. WAY. He ate it all himself, bacon whore that he is."
Am I wrong?
Just thought I'd wish you a terrific Tuesday Matt-Man. The sandwiches look fantastic & have managed to make me crave a midnight snack.
Hope Schmoop is feeling much better very soon.
I love BLTs. One of my favorite restaurants makes a BBLT. That's right, double bacon. It's a beautiful thing.
Sometimes I like to drop the L and the T and add smoked cheddar cheese and some shredded smoked ham and have grilled ham, cheese and bacon too.
Bacon is just so versatile. ;-)
Songbird: Not true at all, Schmoop and I split he goodness. Cheers!!
Snig: Thanks Snig...I'll be by tomorrow to catch up with ya, you Georgia peach, you. Cheers!!
Jay: Oh man, I agree. Bacon doesn't have to be a BLT. But we hadn't had true BLTs in awhile...Damn, I'm hungry again just thinking about it. Cheers Jay!!
Oh, yeah, BTW - you get less shrinkage if you use uncured bacon. Just thought you might like the food tip.
You know you're in trouble when a Matt-Man post starts out, "Let me preface this post by reiterating that Schmoop started her period early Sunday morning..."
The only thing better than a BLT is a fried SPAM sandwich!
I have never in my life seen someone cook bacon in the oven. I can't get my mind off bacon being cooked in the oven. I've never even heard of someone cooking bacon in the oven. What the...
Songbird: I take it you have experienced sex with a pig. Cheers!!
Dana: I dunno Dana...Bacon is a damn delicious thing. For me, that's a tough call. Cheers Sexy!!
Lu: It's the best. Foil on your pan, stick it in the oven, and voila...No Mess. 450 degrees for about 30 minutes or so, turning it once. Cheers!!
Oven bacon is best, for sure!
Micky: I think so...And the house still captures all of the good bacon aroma. Cheers Mick!!
Aww bacon, that stuff is good!
OMG...The sight of your bacon just made me cum!
Woke up sick to my stomach today...eww. Turn on the computer, visit Matt-Man, and see GREASE. OMG-osh, I gotta go...
Roger: It is isn't, it? Cheers Roger!!
Lady Jaye: You don't know how often I hear that. Cheers LJ!!
Jen: Running away from the sight of bacon!? That's Blasphemous. Cheers Jen!!
You're such a damn tease!
RLL: I would never tease you...you can have my bacon anytime you'd like. Cheers!!
Add some sliced avocado and I would be in fat heaven! Love BLT'S anytime of day! Scmoop is feeling better now I hope and I see you broke out what we here call the "fine china"!
Matt... sometime when you are maybe craving a litTle sweetness try sprinkling some brown sugar on the bacon b4 baking it... it is MARVILOUS!
MARVELOUS!** Gadz I am a horrible speller
I'm a stickler for the details - I was always told that Baby Jeebus was in the details so I immediately noticed ...
in that last shot ...
one big ole greasy thumb print in each of those fine buns - as if someone with HUGE hands had been cradling those buns
Yummy!
...I can't get past the similarities in the color schemes of the two pics (the opened mail and the bacon)...but yeah,BLT's are yum-fucking-oh!!!
Kotex burgers? illlll
Cheesy: I don't have much of a sweet tooth. Although you'd never know it by the looks of my teeth. Cheers Cheesy!!
Dianne: You are observant. Would you like my greasy thumb print on your buns? Cheers Di!!
Phfrankie: Of course YOU can't. Cheers!!
Mt. Cat: Always served rare no doubt. Cheers!!
So you are telling me that CVS is keeping track of "the flo"? Is this some sort of government project? I'm very disturbed by this news.
Knight: Come back in five minutes...it gets better. Cheers!!
Holy crap! I hope they aren't messing with my birth control. I knew CVS was just a cover for "the man". Damn.
Bacon? Bacon? Is somebody cooking bacon? Them look good!
Knight: The man is messin with your fallopians. Cheers Knight!!
VE: Bacon is manna from heaven. God Bless the Oinkers. Cheers!!
This confirms for me, that there are search engines out there "always on and running" seeking key words on the internet.
It's BIG and it ain't your BROTHER.
I want a set of horns like Jay!
Micky: Are you calling for a Viking revolt against The Man? Cheers!!
Count me in....ooohhh you used the word...revolt. Scary! Ha!
Micky: Homeland Security will be all over my ass. Cheers Mick!!
I prefer to use my griddle on the stove top to do my bacon...
I love bacon and mayo and toasted white bread and...well that's it!
I got the same package ....I hope to hell I'm not being tracked!
Mmmmmmm BLTS!!
Not even the flashback to those days of having horrible periods can mess up the lovely thing that is a BLT.
We had bacon cheeseburgers and fried corn last night YUM OH
Bond: And who doesn't love em? Cheers!!
Metal: You'd better cross your legs baby. Cheers!!
TB: Mmmmmmmmm fried corn. Yum. Cheers TB!!
Damn that looks tasty...the BLT that is, not the Kotex. Those things are nasty. Besides the strings always gets caught in my teeth!
blood clots and bacon? best post title of the year
I'm soooo hungry now! *pout*
Apparently CVS has secret powers! Now if only someone would send me money when my bills are due.
Oh, wow, bacon! Baaaaaycoooonnnnn... looooooveeee baaaaaccccoooonnnnn... (drool). But, I also think pigs are kinda pretty, smart, too, so I don't eat bacon very often. Sigh.
Wow, a uterine gift package. That's kinda cool. Luckily for me (and pretty much everyone around me), I don't have a uterus and thus would have to use those goodies for something else - like waxing the floor. (Guess CVS won't be sending ME anything soon.)
Hello my name is Schmoop. My "friend" Sid is with me, fucking always! I hate him with a passion of 1000 fiery suns. Bacon is good...mmmmm....bacon....Thank you.
Gee thanks.. now I'm wanting a BLT and don't have the B or the L or the T.... Damn you!!!! ;-)
I love a man that can cook! Those BLT's look fabulous! I love them occasionally with avocado. I know what is going on my list this week!
We don't have any CVS pharmacy's that I'm aware of. I never get care packages!
Jeff: How did I know that you wouldsay something along those lines, Jeff? Cheers!!
Nurse: Hiya Myra. Ha. It was the ONLY funny thing about the post. Cheers Sexy!!
Winter: Stop by anytime and share my bacon. Cheers!!
Womens: Don't we all. Thanks for stopping and leaving a comment. Cheers!!
Desert Rat: Yum on da bacon. Schmoop doesn't want any of it, and I don't have a uterus either, so I am going to save the liners and use them for eye patches next Halloween. Cheers!!
Schmoop: Thank you for the succinct commentary. My tally whacker misses you. Bad Sid, bad. Cheers!!
Dixie: A Thousand Pardons, my friend. Cheers Dixie!!
Michelle: They are Yum-Oh!! I can send Schmoop's car epackage to you if you'd like. Cheers!!
I'm with DS, since obviously right now I don't need a feminine hygiene product I could've used a BLT...TO EAT, Matt Man!!! *sigh* Get your mind out of the gutter.
CrAzY: Yeah, but in your condition, you'd probably want pickles and Ice Cream on it. Cheers Tish!!
Um. I need bacon now. I tampons too, but that is another matter.
Karen: Ha. It's quite the combination, isn't it? Cheers Karen!!
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