I Have A New Bagwine Buddy!! Martin Fiorentino!!

I have to put October’s Bagwine Whore-O-Scope on pause.

I wanted to say a few things about a new friend of Bagwine Ruminations.

Matt-Man’s new buddy is T. Martin Fiorentino, Jr. (Or, at least someone who works for his firm, but we’ll assume it is him)

But to me, he is better known as, Marty.

There are some things you need to know about Marty. He raised over 100K for Dubya, served in his administration, worked for CSX, and is now an attorney and lobbyist/consultant.

Good ol’ Marty, is also a Finance Co-Chair for Bagwine buddy, John McCain. Yep, Johnny Mac, himself.

Seems as though Marty Fiorentino, Esq., has made 16 return visits to the cozy confines of Bagwine Ruminations of late.

I have no idea how I drew in a man of such political import.

My rapier wit? My winning personality? Who knows?

Maybe we share the love for the elderly. We both want to cradle and protect Johnny Mac.

We want to make sure that Johnny’s golden years are spent eating tender minute steaks and that his diaper is always clean. Somebody has to change his diaper…

That duty is beneath his wife Cindy, and Sarah “Lame and Tall” Palin will have her hands full cleaning up the warm, gooey, morning sickness deposits left on the carpet by her daughter Bristol.

Speaking of Sarah Palin…Maybe Marty and I share a love for Gov. Palin. Perhaps both of us, get turned on by not only her body, but her titanic intellect as well.

We get woodys when she keeps our bearings straight by staring down Putin to the west, and prevents those pesky Canadians to the east from stealing our caribou.

Our flaccid members turn as hard as an iceberg when Sarah coyly acts as though she can’t name any Supreme Court rulings in this nation’s history.

Damn it Marty, I’m glad we share so much in common…and, I am glad you have come aboard the Good Ship Bagwine. Cheers!!

If you guys would like to know more about my new friend Marty or have questions about his firm, you may find the following quite helpful:

T. Martin Fiorentino Jr. lives and/or works in
Ponte Vedra Beach, FL

The Fiorentino Group
31 W. Adams St., Ste. 204
Jacksonville, FL 32202
904.358.2757, fax 904.358.2797
Cell 904.219.6910

I am off all day today. I will be writing, drinking, possibly responding to a cease and desist order from my new friend Marty, and awaiting the big VP debate tonight.

Much has been said about Biden screwing up tonight by talking too much…Palin falling on her face because she is so incredibly uninformed and un-curious.

Those things are quite possible, but I bet it is gonna turn out to be a non-event.

I wish this would happen…

As the debate ends, the two shake hands and then Biden gives Palin a big kiss, grabs her ass and then laughs.

Palin says, “What the Hell was that?”

And Joe responds, “That my dear, was from Matt-Man, Bitch!!”

Cheers!!