Let’s see…What should we talk about today?Oh I know…Just in time for Christmas, let’s discuss unemployment.
That’s right folks, my cohort, muffin o’ love, and best friend Schmoop, is getting laid off.
She found out Friday. Isn’t that nice?
Just in time for the Holidays, her boss/company owner is letting her go after 7 ½ years.
What a sweetheart he is. And trust me, I know what a “helluva” guy he is, because I worked there with her and for him until May of 2007.
Schmoop will find out the particulars as to her layoff on Monday.
Needless to say, I am arming her with a statement for him to sign because I know what a shyster he is, and he would have no qualms about screwing her out of whatever benefits to which she is entitled.
I’ll have much more to say about him once this unfortunate action has been completed.
That’s all I have for today. I am in a bit of a pissy mood over this. More so than she.
But…
Two good things have come out of this situation.
First, she is handling it well, and she needed to get the hell out of there anyway.
And two…
Some people say that after a couple gets into a fight and they perform the ritualistic “make-up sex”, it’s the best sex ever.
That, I have found to be untrue. The best sex you will ever experience is, Layoff Notification Sex.
It was GREAT!!
Fortunately and thankfully, I still get to go into work later today, but before I go, I have a request…
Could somebody hand me some gauze pads, an ace bandage, and a bottle of peroxide? I have bruises, bite marks, and finger nail scratches all over my body.
Cheers!!
34 comments:
That sucks so bad! Totally bullshit act on their part!
One of my former employers, a place where I worked for 7 years, laid people off the week after Thanksgiving every single year that I was there.
I was supervisor and they always wanted US to go out tell the people who had been laid off the bad news. I finally had enough of it and told the operations manager not to be such a pussy and do it himself. So, he forced the unit managers to do it. Cowards.
Hell, it still pisses me off.
Sorry about the lay off Schmoop.
Well, in the current economy this has got to be a CRAPPY feeling, but sometimes the best kinds of change are forced change.
Cheesy: Yeah, well...What can ya do, I guess. Thanks and Cheers!!
Jay: Ah yes, the balless employer. Big, bad, and yet too much of a pussy to fire or layoff people face to face. Ick. Cheers to ya Jay!!
Dana: The thing that pisses me off is that this never had to happen. The owner, not the economy is responsible for the shits the company is in. Cheers!!
That sucks. Hell of a time to lose income. Like others said, sometimes things like this end up being the best thing that happens. You can talk about leaving a lousy job all you want but having the guts to actually leave it is another. There is, a job out there the she'll like, and my new Christmas wish is that she finds it.
You on the other hand have to start smoozing it up big time with your customers, demand large tips, and possibly start pimping Kelly.
Micky: Yeah, I am bummed for her but also happy that she is going to be out of that hell hole. I just wish the job market was better.
As for the schmoozing and demanding huge tips, I can do that, but to pimp out Kelly? I draw the line at that. Cheers Mick!!
I too think that, in addition to the awesome SEX, there is a silver lining here.
That was a soul sucking place and Schmoop needed to get out.
I'm certain you will have her back in getting what she is entitled to.
TB: Damn right, I'll watch out for her...He is the type of guy who will try to find a way to avoid unemployment compensation, by fighting it or somehow making it seem like she quit. He's Icky. Ha.
But your right; it is a soul sucking environment. Cheers TB!!
that sucks, I am my sympathy too.
Sex cures everything so take care of yourself so that you are in fine form for the months to come to be of service when ever and how often the litte lady needs you!
Snugs: Thanks Snugs. We'll muddle through. And I'll try to keep my wood finely honed and ready to start a fire. Cheers Snugs!!
It looks like Schmoop has become one of many. Sorry about that.
Now, is her time to find her passion and go for it. And if that passion is you? Well, your a lucky man, my friend.
Michele: I know, and thank you. She will be better for it in the long run. I guess I am just a little bummed about the timing of it. Cheers to you, Michele!!
The words "laid off" are never welcome, but they seem to have an even uglier tone to them this time of year. Wishing her well through the adversity.
Jeff: You hit the nail on the head buddy. And the timing also confirms everything I have felt about this guy. Cheers Jeff!!
Sorry for your pain--both of yours.
Fantasy: Thanks Meg. I know she is far from alone in this situation during these times, but as human nature would have it, it is always harder when it happens in one's own home...especially at Christmas time. Cheers!!
There is all that 'one door closes and another opens' crap - and the funny thing is it is often true
but I feel like being pissed for Schmoop so I will brew up an old Yiddish curse of Nana's
When Schmoop sees this asshat next the pus will be flowing from all his orifices.
there is no fucking reason to lay off people now - it can wait til the New Year
and to lay them off on a Friday and then make them wait til Monday for details!!
Let the pus flow!
Love you both - better days are on the horizon - just need the clouds to clear.
Dianne: Ha. Thanks. While Schmoop has always been much more tolerant of him than I, your curse sums up how I feel about him after working for him for four years.
I will be more than free with my description of him and his antics after the dust settles. Cheers Di!!
Hey Matt!
I'm sorry to hear about Schmoop's layoff. That truly bites!
You look cute in your Santa hat.
:-)
Hugs,
Kimmie
Kimmie: Thanks. Hope all is well with ya. Cheers!!
Well ain't that the shits? Give Schmoop a hug from me. Kidlet's dad is likely to be out of a job here come January. After 13 years there and more patents than I can count. Company loyalty ain't what it used to be.
Well, there goes HIS nomination for boss of the year.
What an asswipe. Sorry Schmoop.
Thanks for everything guys and gals! With this moron, things will change on Monday. No fear though, I will find a GOOD job!! Thanks again...Loves!!
I also meant to say that I would NOT be able to be so calm without my Matt Man. Love you babe!
Dang that sucks. Hang in there Schmoop! I'm sure you'll land on your feet.
Got the peroxide here for ya if you still need it! Man that must have been some romp in the hay... damn!
Asshat! Do you want me to mail him some dog poop in a bag?
But you know how I feel about work anyway so I feel this is the first step on the long road to total anti-work enlightenment. Go out and seek sponsorship toward doing nothing and hoping it's everything you wished it would be...
This economy thing is pretty scary! It seems like so many people are getting the pink slip.. Hopefully she'll find another job soon!
Starr: Loyalty? Yeah, what the hell is that any more. What a jerk. Cheers Starr!!
Giggle: He wouldn't have gotten that nomination even if he wasn't laying her off. Cheers GP!!
Schmoop: Pfffffft. You've been the calm one...I want blood. Cheers and Loves!!
Travis: She is kinda cat-like. Well, a clumsy cat. Cheers Travis!!
Sabrae: Hey There. It was pretty damn good. Thanks for commenting.
Always nice to see a fellow Ohioan on here. You and Fantasy are the only ones on here oddly enough. Cheers!!
VE: Ha. You know what? You should be a "life coach." Cheers Poop-Man!!
Michelle: Thanks. I hope so too. But like I said, this wasn't an economy thing, it was a "run the company into the ground" thing. Cheers!!
That really sucks. People have no loyalty these days! I have been hearing that story over and over this year. It is a good reminder that we should be thankful for our jobs not matter how much they suck.
She's the third blogger I know to get laid off this close to Christmas.
It sucks, it really does.
Yep, I'm making up for lost time, been drunk and fishing for 4 days.
Misery hates company....she will be one of the millions in the coming year. 2009 is gonna suck for the economy, and I don't give a rat who is running the show. We are in deep sheet, but you lady's boss' timing SUCKS!
catching up....
end of year layoffs always seem more heartless don't they?
Oh well...she hated it there anyway..
damn.
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