Sunday, April 04, 2010

Sunday Morning Church Disservice: Christ Is Risen!! Pass Me Another Slice of Pizza and Wash It Up, Schmoop!!

Happy Resurrection Day, Bitches!!

Jeebus has moved away that big ass stone and is now walking around in search of Mary Magdalene so he can tell her he’s back and that he wants to toss her salad.

I am going to go see Ryno this morning for a little bit, and then I am headed back home in order to end my six week breadless sojourn and eat pizza.

And when I say that, I mean eat pizza…all…damn…day.

Schmoop and I have been having a craving for Pizza Hut, so we are getting a large pan crust Super Supreme, and a large thin crust Meat Lover’s.

Holy Cow!! My arteries are getting as tight as my dick is hard just thinking about it. Oh Baby!!

Schmoop’s brother may be over for an Easter Service beer, but other than that, we will just be hanging out and eating…alot.

I may post some pictures of the gastronomical orgy later today, but other than that, I just plan on feeding my bread need, becoming one with Jeebus, and perhaps getting some of this for dessert…

Oh yeah…Praise Jeebus!!

Happy Easter All, and may you enjoy the day.

Amen, and Amen.

Cheers!!

23 comments:

Michele said...

You've got another 20 minutes. Me....I can do whatever the hell I want. Why? Because I'm a heathen.

Matt-Man said...

Michele: Ha, so am I, but self-discipline is something I enjoy six weeks out of the year. I am having two hot dogs on buns shortly after the clock strikes midnight. Cheers Michele!!

Michele said...

Hotdogs? You do love living on the edge.

Matt-Man said...

Michele: I do love them so. I'm such a peasant. And plus...I'm tired. Cheers Michele!!

Mrs. D said...

I figured you'd gorge on some warm cinnamon toast. Happy Easter!

Matt-Man said...

D: Ha. Maybe in the morning. Just finished my dogs and am off to sleep now. I hope you all have a wunnerful Easter. Cheers D!!

Scott Oglesby said...

That’s crazy….I was in a bad car accident, broke my jaw, and had it wired shut for two full moths back in 05. The craving I had worse than any other…Pizza Hut. And I’d only ever eaten it maybe once a year the rest of my life. There must be something about lack of carbs that makes it seem like dough crack. Pizza Hut is open today?

Happy magic bunny day….the yeast has risen!!

Dana said...

Happy Pizza ... ummm ... resurrection day!

Matt-Man said...

Scott: I don't know what it is either, maybe just because I can't remember the last time we had PH pizza. So yeah...they'd better be open.

And ha...I was going to use the yeast line you wrote. How 'bout that. Cheers Scott!!

Dana: Happy Easter to you and Cam. Have a wonderful day. Cheers Dana!!

MysteryChick said...

Happy Easter-Pizza Orgy Day Matt-Man!

Phfrankie Bondo said...

...God, Himself, is eating Pizza Hut today...

Charlene said...

If I had been on a no bread diet, I'd be eating lunch at one of those fern bar restaurants where they give you unlimited yeast rolls before your meal of salad!

Happy Pizza Sunday.

Jay said...

I had a shot of tequila at 12:01 am. Thought about driving through McDonalds, but decided against it. I WILL be having Pizza Hut tonight also.

Christ is risen. And after that pic of Schmoop, so am I. ;-)

Matt-Man said...

Chick: Why thank ya. If ya really hurry, you can stop by and join us. Happy Easter to ya and Chees!!

Phfrankie: Ha. Maybe he is. Cheers P-Man!!

Charlene: Thanks, but please don't mention salad. I had plenty the last six weeks. I am salded out. Have a wunnerful day. Cheers Charlene!!

Matt-Man said...

Jay: Hey we could Skype tonight and listen to each other chowing down on pizza. I do have question however...

Exactly how do you know that that is a picture of Schmoop!? Cheers Jay!!

Mike said...

When I hear a loud explosion from the east I'll know you had one to many pieces of pizza.

Matt-Man said...

Mike: Is it possible to have too much pizza? Cheers Mike!!

Jay said...

Matt-Man said: "Exactly how do you know that that is a picture of Schmoop!?

Cause I took the photo.

Er ..uh, I mean. Cause it looks like her leg and bum to me.

Uh, wait.

I mean, you seemed to imply on this post that it was Schmoop, so I assumed it was. Yeah, that's it! ;-)

Matt-Man said...

Jay: Ya know...I knew it would finally come out. Your sordidness. Your and Schmoop's stabbing me in the back and sexual betrayal. All of it...But who knew that it would come out on Easter. Christ has risen today and I have died.

I'm going to have to add a P'Zone to my pizza order. Cheers Jay!!

Desert Rat said...

Happy Easter! Let the bread-fest begin (errr... well, obviously it's already begun). Let the bread-fest CONTINUE! Yeah, that's it!

Matt-Man said...

Rat: Hee...We've got a problem Rat. We've been calling Pizza Hut for two hours; they're not answering. Could it be they're closed? My post later today could get quite ugly. Cheers Rat!!

Joker_SATX said...

Happy Easter Matt-Man!

Matt-Man said...

Joker: Right back at ya my good man. Cheers Joker!!