Wednesday, September 08, 2010

Please Stand By...

Hi Kidz!! I have a programming note for you lovable, adorable perverts.

Sometime late Wednesday, I will become incommunicado for a time as I de-cord, de-power, and give the last rites to my computer.

It pisses me off...but, as the American Way is to build shit that doesn’t last so one is forced to buy something new, my piece of shit computer is being incredibly patriotic.

I have to respect that, and I shall be returning soon.

On Thursday, I will pick up my new unit thanks to Schmoop’s brother David, and hook it up sometime on that day as my Beer Mine schedule allows.

I shall (if all goes according to plan) be back in the digital age and swimming through the tubes of internets sometime before noon on Friday.

I know…I know…even thinking about a Matt-Man-Less World Wide Web let alone experiencing it, is a scary thing, but be strong.

It will be but a brief moment in time…

Unless of course, my string of bad luck continues and nothing fucking works after I hook it up!!

Maybe if I promise to burn a Quran on Saturday, GAWD will smile down upon me and my computer set-up with righteousness.

Until then, you chuckleheads…

Cheers!!

19 comments:

Dana said...

So in other words, you had to tell us you'd be MIA or we wouldn't have noticed?? I mean ... OH.MY.GOD! How will I be able to survive??

Matt-Man said...

Dana: This is exactly what I didn't want to hear. Your obvious fear could be the catalyst for a worldwide panic. Cheers Dana!!

Charlene said...

It will be worse than withdrawal from heroin, which is very hard, I hear. Sniff.

Jeff B said...

Charlene- I'll bring the Methadone and we'll try to get though it together. K?

AAARRRRGGGHHHH!!!!!!!! Oh the humanity!!!

Matt-Man said...

Charlene: It will be hard on me. I'm going to feel naked..Hey, I'll get naked during the down time. Problem solved. Cheers Charlene!!

Jeff: Wild Irish Rose would be more effective. Be strong, Jeff. Cheers!!

Mike said...

"adorable perverts"

I haven't been called adorable in a long time, thanks.

Matt-Man said...

Mike: You are so damn adorable that somedays? I think I am in love with you. Cheers Mike!!

Scott Oglesby said...

Wow, good luck and I mean that. I don’t envy you this task. My wife somehow saved a computer from the depths of hell, maybe I should send her over?

Matt-Man said...

Scott: It's no biggie; I'm not trying to save this one, just hookin gup a new one. But, you can send your wife over, she could probably use the break. Cheers Scott!!

Alowishus Culpepper Bondo said...

...will there be hotdogs at the Quoran burning?..

Matt-Man said...

P-Man: In keeping with the anti-Muslim theme, I thought kielbasa, BLTs, and pulled pork would be more appropriate. Cheers P-Man!!

Jay said...

Rosh Hashanah begins at sundown tonight. Anyone up for a good Torah burning as practice for the Quran burning on Saturday? Oh, I guess THAT would draw opposition from Sarah Palin and that crowd. Okay, we'll just wait until Christmas Eve and burn a few Bibles to keep us warm.

Matt-Man said...

Jay: I thought about that but as my first name is Hebrew, and thought the Torah burning would be in bad taste, so...

I shall instead celebrate the Jewish New Year tonight after work by eating Schmoop's knish and having her blow on my shofar. Happy Jewish New Year Indeed!! Cheers Jay!!

Beth said...

Whoo Hoo!!! You go Hebrew boy!!

Matt-Man said...

Schmoop: Catholic By Birth, Jewish By Inspiration!! Cheers and Zoves!!

Raquel's World said...

WE MISS YOU!

Matt-Man said...

Raquel: That's sweet...if not, sarcastic. ; )~ Cheers Roc!!

MysteryChick said...

Say it isn't so!!!

Matt-Man said...

Chick: Oh it be so. Cheers Chick!!