Saturday, September 11, 2010

Remembering 9/11: A Bagwine Tradition

Over the past nine years there has been speculation about the “real” story of who was responsible for the attacks of September 11, 2001.

Some conspiracies out there are that our own government did it, or Israel initiated it, and of course the former Bush administration’s position of:

“It doesnt matter who did it, as long we say “Saddam Hussein” as many times as possible when talking about 9-11.”

I have a very good idea who master-minded this cowardly attack. I came up with the answer after asking myself...

“Who profited from such an attack? Osama? "

No, all he has gotten out of the deal is a lifetime of cave dwelling.

The hijackers? Helloooooo…DEAD. Oh sure maybe they got their 72 virgins, but I am certain that there is a reason that they were virgins...there are few really hot looking Muslims.

Perhaps, President Bush was at fault...

I don’t think so, because three of the four attacks were successful in terms of their intent.

This shows proper planning and execution of the plan.


This of course, is quite the opposite of the Bush administration’s history concerning Military and Foreign policy efforts.

So, who does that leave?

Who’s dried up career is resurrected every time a national tragedy occurs? Ladies and gentlemen, look no further than Branson, Missouri and you will find the culprit…



That's right, Lee Greenwood!!

The man who rakes in royalties from his song(s) "Proud to be an American" and/or "God Bless the USA".

I have a feeling he was also the brainchild behind the the first Iraq War. As you know, you can't go to war without a rifle, a mess-kit, and Lee Fucking Greenwood.

Nice try Lee, but the Matt-Man is on to you and my next step is to call Oliver Stone.

I will be remembering 9-11 today by working 11-9 at the Beer Mine. How reciprocal is that!?

Enjoy your Saturday and...


Cheers!!

10 comments:

Dianne said...

if we could send Lee into the mountains and just have him sing they'd all surrender

Matt-Man said...

Dianne: That would be the most patriotic thing he could do. I shall email him. Cheers Di!!

Dana said...

Of course! After nine years of speculation is all makes sense!

Lee Greenwood ...

Matt-Man said...

Dana: Nothing gets by me. Cheers Dana!!

MysteryChick said...

You may be onto something there Matt-Man, Lee Greenwood! Ha!

I'm not so sure about the whole 72 virgins thing. To me a real reward would be one really well traveled pirate whore or something like that.

David said...

I fear I've grown too old to effectively satisfy 72 women.

Oy, the headaches of listening to the whining of the jealous ones.

Mike said...

Funny picture. I you were wearing that jacket the "patriots" would want to kill you for desecrating the flag. Aparently when Lee does it, it's patriotic.

Charlene said...

Every time I hear that song, I want to kill a radio. Also the statement: God Bless America is so disingenuous the people who say it like saying "how are you?" when they could care less would be shocked to learn that God is not always a Christian god, so saying that is getting blessings from Buddha!

VE said...

I know Google had something to do with it. They are the new Ma Bell and are behind EVERYTHING...

Knight said...

How did we not catch this sooner? I hope you have a personal line directly to Obama for when these revalations hit you.