Wednesday, August 03, 2011

West Side Story

The west end of Bagwine strikes again!

I came into work Tuesday morning, only to discover my internet connection is moving like an old man trying to return soup in a deli.

This couldn’t be good right? For me I mean, fuck everyone else. How was I to function for eight or nine hours with the internet this way!

I have no patience for slowness! Um…I really don’t need the internet for work. My work programs were just fine. Fuckers.

Then…it quit altogether. It quit.

A side note. This had nothing to do with Time Warner Cable. 

No, my friends, it’s all about the thugs, and assholes in the neighborhood. Time Warner tried to help us over the phone, but had to eventually issue a job ticket.

See, we’ve had this happen before. In the alley by my building, is the pole where the cable box is located. A forty foot pole. Forty foot.

These dwellers around here get their ladder, climb up, open the box, and steal cable, and internet service. They’ve done it at least three times. Why yes, they are reported by the cable company each and every time, but I’m certain it takes a hell of a lot to prosecute.

Anyhoo, Time Warner did their job.

Needless to say, I lost my motherfucking mind! Yes me, see above about everybody else.

Between actual work, and my boss asking 457 times, “Is it on yet?” Oh my sweet, sweet Baby Jeebus.

Luckily for me, and the health and well being of everyone around me, the internet came back on at 12:30.

What? Six hours isn't a long time to go without entertainment?  Let’s see you try it buckos!



sybil law said...

Wow! people that desperate to get on the fricking internet will climb a pole to get it?! Poles are for dancing, not climbing. Duh.

Jay said...

That's what you guys get for putting your business in da hood.

Seriously though, climbing a 40 foot pole to steal cable? I don't know if I should be outraged or impressed.

David said...

There are not a lot of uses for a 40 foot pole so I guess those who are impressed by size might as well climb it.

Mike said...

Are you sure the pole is 40 feet? Most poles in alleys are 35'. The phone cable would be 15' off the ground with the TV cable 1' above it. The pole itself is 5 1/2 feet in the ground. 2' plus 10 percent of the overall length. So depending on the electric above, a 35' pole will suffice in most situations.

Did I mention I used to work for the phone company?

Mike said...

Geez I almost forgot. The brand that tells you how tall a pole is is 10 feet from the end. So if it's a 35' pole the mark will be 4.5' off the ground. On a 40' pole it would be 4' off the ground. Check it out.

Beth said...

Sybil: I agree poles are for dancing, these people are just assholes.

Jay: What can I say, my boss is cheap! Oh, I'm impressed they do it, but damn;)

David: I agree, however these people only have a combined IQ of 4

Beth said...

Mike: You worked for the phone company? No. If I wasn't afraid I'd get gutted, I would go measure this pole for you. I know how you like accuracy;)

IWS Radio said...

You could always put a shrunken head on the pole with a note saying that this is all that is left of the last person who stole our cable. Cheers!!


Beth said...

Matt: Ooooo! Me like;)

IWS Radio said...

IWS Radio...Always Here to Help. Zoooves!!

Beth said...


bobbybegood1 said...

I here ya Beth. WTF! Twitter is the same way - slow as M-O-L-A-S-S-E-S! You would think with all this high-tech shit we have things would be better, but NOOOOOOOOOOO. Cheers Sweetie!!