The west end of Bagwine strikes again!
I came into work Tuesday morning, only to discover my internet connection is moving like an old man trying to return soup in a deli.
This couldn’t be good right? For me I mean, fuck everyone else. How was I to function for eight or nine hours with the internet this way!
I have no patience for slowness! Um…I really don’t need the internet for work. My work programs were just fine. Fuckers.
Then…it quit altogether. It quit.
A side note. This had nothing to do with Time Warner Cable.
No, my friends, it’s all about the thugs, and assholes in the neighborhood. Time Warner tried to help us over the phone, but had to eventually issue a job ticket.
See, we’ve had this happen before. In the alley by my building, is the pole where the cable box is located. A forty foot pole. Forty foot.
These dwellers around here get their ladder, climb up, open the box, and steal cable, and internet service. They’ve done it at least three times. Why yes, they are reported by the cable company each and every time, but I’m certain it takes a hell of a lot to prosecute.
Anyhoo, Time Warner did their job.
Needless to say, I lost my motherfucking mind! Yes me, see above about everybody else.
Between actual work, and my boss asking 457 times, “Is it on yet?” Oh my sweet, sweet Baby Jeebus.
Luckily for me, and the health and well being of everyone around me, the internet came back on at 12:30.
What? Six hours isn't a long time to go without entertainment? Let’s see you try it buckos!
Zoooooves!!
Hey!!
Hot enough for ya? Sorry Matt-Man, couldn’t resist.
I don’t know what the temperatures are where you live, but it’s hotter than Kelsey’s nuts in Bagwine. That is fucking hot, people!!
It’s pretty bad when going out for a five minute smoke at work causes me to sweat. I am not one to sweat usually; I’m mainly cold. This week though…
I’ve been going from air conditioner to air conditioner.
Anyhoo…
Thanks for joining me here on Bagwine Ruminations today. Just wanted to mention the suffocating heat where I am, because as we all know, it’s all about me.
Ha. I’m kidding. I kid because I love, and…this post is brought to you by random musings.
My cat, for now…for some odd reason gets on the top of the fridge and the very top kitchen cabinet. She hasn’t done this in years.
We figured it was her age, and um, shhhhh in case she is reading this…her girth that was keeping her from her fave perch.
So now, when she is perched there, every time I leave the kitchen, she bitch slaps me on the back of the head. Bitch.
Lessee…
I made a most splendid macaroni and cheese the other night. It was NOT a box thing, I made it myself. Matt said it was awesome, but I think he just wants to get laid. He also says I’m pretty.
Hmmm…I’m sensing a trend here.
I really need to start writing about important shit. You know…politics, the media, the financial crisis…
Who the Hell am I kidding? I am the drivel queen!!
Sorry this all over the place, but I am typing this at work and I need to keep stopping to find things. I don’t even know what I have written. I won’t know until this posts on Friday. I have an editor, y’know.
Oh shit, listen up!! Define irony…
Matt-Man stages a one man campaign against Time Warner, and what did I do yesterday? I paid the cable bill, however…
Less than 48 hours after he threatened to publicly humiliate them on Bagwine, I’m With Stupid, the I’m With Stupid radio show, and hold a rally outside their office in Bagwine, Ohio…
Those bastards caved, and we will be getting our non-dropping internet cable upgrade on the 27th, or as I pray, we better be, ’cause Matt-Man will get uber-ugly wif em if it doesn‘t happen, and I saw him when he worked for SEIU, his ugliness is not a good thing.
Who loves themselves?
Zoooooves!!
We have been having trouble with Time Warner Cable the past few weeks. Our internet and phone lose connection frequently.
If you read I'm With Stupid you have already seen this, but my constant pain in the ass knight in shining armor, Matt-Man, has taken matters into his "subtle" hands.
He fired this e-mail off to Time Warner yesterday...
To whom it may, but probably doesn’t, concern…
As a Time Warner customer for many years, I have always been happy. Well, happy until the last eight weeks or so.
For the past eight weeks, I have been trying to get my cable line upgraded so my internet and phone connection do not go down multiple times a day.
In addition to the several online chats (all documented) with your online technicians, we have had two service calls about our internet dropping with frequency…One on 6/29/11 and another on 7/6/11.
On July 6th I was promised by the service guy, Mike, that we would have our cable line upgraded in a week or so. He did his job, and put in a line upgrade request while he was here.
Needless to say, on your end, it has not happened, and sadly, I do not expect it to be done in the near future, because well…
Your oversized communications conglomerate only cares about new customers and doesn’t give a crap about existing, “been there for years”, customers.
Along with the anger I feel toward your company, I also laugh, because when I see your commercials come on TV (when my cable is working) where you advertise your “24/7 support”, I say to myself:
“Self, if only that were true; however, your $130.00 a month or so, is but a joke to them, and I and others like me, are but a mere punch line.”
I spoke to the apartment complex manager today (7/20/11) to see if she had been contacted by you to access the apartment above me in order to affect repairs two weeks after your promise.
She said:
“Matt…No, in fact I have been on them (TWC) for two years to upgrade the entire complex.”
Call me crazy, but I don’t consider that 24/7 support. I don’t consider that any support. I consider that, bullshit.
I edit/write two daily websites and do a twice weekly internet radio show and will be promoting your intransigence and lack of caring in this matter until hell freezes over or my connection gets fixed.
In addition…
I am organizing an informational picket outside of your Springfield, Ohio office located at 22 S. Limestone St. to voice my displeasure and the displeasure of others on August 3, 2011.
You have let me down, and seriously, you just don’t give a damn.
Matt Mahoney
2680 E. High St. Apt. 102
Springfield, Ohio 45505
Acct. Telephone number: 937.324.1798
Thus far, all we have received is a form e-mail. Bastards.
Zoooooves!!
Oh dear God this has been one shitty week.
My travails of hopelessness and despair began on Tuesday.
It took me four phone calls to have a 12 minute conversation with my kid because my wonderful Time Warner service kept going down.
The dropped calls and loss of internet continued as I attempted to talk to Jayman. And then…
While checking on the status of my Federal Tax refund, I found out that some clerical error on my part caused it to be rejected…two months ago!!
No one notified me, so I discovered this little nugget of information eight weeks after the fact. That’s nice.
The IRS doesn’t know why it was rejected and the e-file service I used has been equally unhelpful, so I shall take this chore back up on Monday.
In the meantime, I have one good contact and a pair of glasses that are held together by bailing wire.
Fuck.
I’ve been working on a couple of things this week, and each time I have attempted to work on them, I have screwed something up.
Schmoop began her monthly uterine disintegration Tuesday and has felt like crap all week. Oy…
Gloomy times in the Bagwine digs.
On the upside, since of late, everything that I touch seems to turn to rust, Jayman and I are simply going to shoot the shit over beer and wings at 6:30 PM EDT tonight on I’m With Stupid on Blog Talk Radio.
That’s right…We are just going to talk about mutual internet problems we’ve had. Chat about Father’s Day. Discuss the upcoming Summer of ’11, and perhaps talk about the joys of cooking out.
What could go wrong? I mean, other than my phone going out again, BTR fucking up, and/or thoroughly pissing somebody or bodies off?
So join us tonight at 6:30 on I’m with Stupid and even call in if you’d like at 661.244.9852.
To access the I’m With Stupid radio page click HERE.
Off to work the Beer Mine until 4 today…please, wish me luck.
Cheers!!
Ahhhhh, the first day of September, and Labor Day Weekend is just a couple of days away.
It’s an extended weekend for many Americans, including myself. I am off Thursday, Friday, and Saturday, and guess what I shall be doing…
Drinking mass quantities of potent potables and watching College Football!! Damn Straight!! The 2009 NCAA Football season begins Thursday night, and the initial week of games continues right on through Monday.
Oh dear God, I do love it so.
There are a couple of really good match-ups taking place…Oregon vs. Boise State, Georgia vs. Oklahoma State, Alabama vs. Virginia Tech, and of course Saturday afternoon…
The Wolfpack of The University of Nevada invades South Bend to take on my beloved Notre Dame Fighting Irish.
I have no doubt that ND will suck, break my heart, and leave me spewing expletives from my mouth and steam from my big ears.
I have suffered through the Davie years, lost hope through the Willingham years, and now, I throw things at the TV through the Charlie Weis years.
Charlie “I Helped to Coach 18,000 Super Bowl Champions” Weis, has consistently put a defense on the field that operates under what I call, “The Croquet Wicket System” because ND opponents have no trouble rolling right through it.
He has done a decent job developing current Cleveland Browns and former ND QB Brady Quinn as well as current Irish QB Jimmy Claussen. Quinn and Claussen have become decent players because of Weis’ genius.
The success of those two has been in large part due to the fact Weis is incapable of developing an effective running game even if his upcoming opponent is, The University of Blind Thalidomide Babies.
When a team can’t run the ball, and as a result has to throw it often, a QB can get pretty good at passing and getting up off of his ass after taking a bone crushing, blind side hit from a 325 pound defensive end.
Oh Charlie…How you make us Notre Dame fans proud. In fact, you make the entire Irish race proud, because when seeing a couple of Irish guys like Quinn and Claussen never failing to get up after another pounding on national TV, it proves how tough we Irish truly are.
God Bless Ya, Charlie.
On a sad note…We suffered a death in the Bagwine Family over the weekend. The remote to our cable box, whom I have loved, adored, and long ago named, hANNd Margret, died from natural causes.
My sexy siren who offered me a world of entertainment, ease of channel surfing, and a feeling of omnipotence, could give no more.
As a result of her passing, I must trot down to our local Time Warner Cable office sometime this morning, and pick up a new channel girl...
For this weekend, I have beer to drink, a Charlie Weis Voodoo Doll to construct, and dozens of college football games between which I must be able to flip back and forth.
Cheers!!
No, my friends, it’s all about the thugs, and assholes in the neighborhood. Time Warner tried to help us over the phone, but had to eventually issue a job ticket.
