My feet and ankles…A collection of 52 bones and 66 joints that have supported me for 43 years.
They are my friends.
I have no idea why, but I took this picture yesterday and then began to think about what my feet and I have been through over the decades.
I also thought about how those look like comfortable shoes, and how Mama said those shoes would take me anywhere.
Just a simple picture of my size 12, shoe covered feet conjured up memories that had been long laced up and put away into the closet of time.
I thought about the days that I played Little League baseball. I had a great swing, a good glove, and quick feet.
I batted .542 when I was 12 and was All-City for the third straight year. Why do I mention this?
Because that was my athletic peak. It was all downhill from there, so I hold on to that memory like grim death.
Eight years later I would hit my sexual peak, however few knew because nobody wanted to have sex with me.
Sad perhaps, but my feet never left my side…or in this case, bottom.
My feet are blessed with a pretty high arch. In fact one chick I knew who had a foot fetish, referred to them as the Arch de Triomphe’.
My feet have supported me when I carried the caskets of my mom, my dad, and my oldest brother to their graves.
They also supported me the day that I, before my family, friends, and God himself, stood on the altar, and made one huge ass mistake.
My feet never failed when I paced the room at 2 A.M., with my son in my arms, trying to get him back to sleep.
Nor did they let me down, on those nights when I was completely shit-faced drunk and yet, remained upright.
Yep, good old Moe and Joe as I call them, have been as reliable as the arrival of Paris Hilton’s monthly yeast infection.
My feet…A well-heeled collection of metatarsals, phalanges, muscles, and of course the keystone of the foot, the Big Toe.
It’s April 1st. A day when people pull pranks on one another…a day for fools.
Well, as for me, I will suffer fools no longer. I, from here on out, will make this day in my world known as:
April Foot’s Day.
Here’s to you my podiatric pals.
You have given me balance during the tough times, helped me to run from the cops on occasion, and inspired the dance genius of Kevin Bacon.
You guys rock.
Make sure that today, you look down, and say, “Feet, you may be on the bottom, but you are tops in my book.”
Cheers!!
