Saturday, December 15, 2007

The 5 B's: Burglary, Basketball, Boobs, Blog Talk, and Bagwine

It's always nice to get Christmas cards, but these are special. They come from three of my blogging buddies. Vinny, Jules, and Metalmom, sent these to the Bagwine abode. The best thing is that all the envelopes had return addresses on them. I now know exactly where they live, and when these clowns kind folks go on vacation this summer, I can burglarize their homes.

Merry Christmas to me. Come summer, I'll be enjoying my new appliances and electronics!!



Ladies and Gentlemen, at Shooting Guard...Standing 5'4" tall...From Bagwine, Ohio...Wearing Number 23...Rynoooooo!!

The ex and I didn't always get along very well, but we did produce one sweet, handsome child.




What would the weekends be without an Inky and Lola cartoon? Hmm...Lola's boobs look smaller than usual; I must need a new Sharpie!!





You didn't think I would let today pass without another dose of shameless self-promotion did you? Tune into Turnbaby's BlogTalk Radio Show tomorrow at 8 P.M. EST. TB and I will be butchering singing as many yuletide favorites as we can in an hour.

Call in and you'll get the added pleasure of talking to me nekkid. Double the fun, and when you call in, you be nekkid as well. For TB's show details you can click HERE.


I doubt if my son has basketball practice today, so if I don't need to take him, I'll be here all day. The weather outside is supposed to turn very frightful in a little while, so I guess that being in front of my computer with several big glasses of Bagwine is the best and safest place to be.

The great thing is that Schmoop's brother and Bagwine fave, David, has a brand new 4-Wheel drive Jeep, and has promised to brave the elements, come over to the digs, and drop off a fresh supply of libation later. D-Man, I dub thee Sir David: Protector and Deliverer of the Bagwine.

And to all of you: Have fun, stay safe, and as always, Cheers!!

NOTE: The pictures are much sharper if you click on them and view. I had sizing issues. Of course, I have always had issues with size.

40 comments:

Julie said...

Well at least I'm on top!

Bwahahahahaha!!!

Well I mean not underneath...not the highest but on top..you see? ARGH!!!

Anyway I have absolutely nothing of value 'cept a 110 pound choc lab that will make sure you won't have any hands to hold your Sharpie with! And....Ummmm that's mighty silly thing to call "IT"!

Yes, Mattman you did produce a very handsome fella..only God knows how though.

Better missletoe then camel toe I guess.

Schmoop said...

Julie: He is a sweetheart, but I think you are wrong about one thing...Camel Toe is GOOD. Cheers, and thanks for the card!!

Julie said...

Ewww can't be....cuz that would mean that something wasn't toned and tight now wouldn't it?

Oy ve! It's kinda early for this one isn't it? What will your fans think?

Bwahahhaaha!!!!

Schmoop said...

Julie: I was talking about Camel Toe literally being good. Tastes like chicken. Cheers!!

Odat said...

Lol at the comments already!

I think that mistle "toe" might hurt if INky uses it to kick....
Good one!!!

How cute is Ryno...Go Ryno!!!

I'm busy battening down my hatches here too for the storm.....

Peace

Schmoop said...

Odat: Inky has TMD, Toe of Mass Destruction. And thanks, Ryno is a sweetie. Good luck with the weather; it's just getting ready to start here. Cheers!!

Liz Hill said...

Ryno is one cool dude.

You know--I can make the show 90 minutes long ---just sayin ;-)

Schmoop said...

TB: That's up to you, but it will be hard enough for me to stay sober enough to do 60 minutes. Just sayin'...Cheers!!

Anonymous said...

No wonder the girls are hot for Ryno! He's so cute!!

Will you water the plants and feed the iguana when you're here in the summer? Thatwouldbegreatthanks! LOL
My tables are made of milk crates and boards. Help yourself!!

You keep forgetting Inky's "jingly balls"

Schmoop said...

Metalmom: As Ryno says, "Chicks Dig Me". I will gladly feed your iguana but I dont think you want to know how I will water your plants.

Thanks for the card, and Cheers!!

Anndi said...

First, that boy is such a cutie! You did good buddy!

We're expecting about 15 inches... of the white stuff.. SNOW...

All I'm going to say is...

cute toes! (apparently that kind of comment about feet and feet parts makes guys hot... read that somewhere...)

Schmoop said...

Anndi: Thanks and lucky you with all of the snow. Not into toes that much, I think it's because mine are so disgusting. Cheers!!

Desert Songbird said...

My card must not have arrived yet; otherwise, I KNOW mine would be ON TOP, right? When you get here this summer, don't forget to pay Rejelio and his crew for the lawn service.

Ryno is adorable. Are you sure he's yours?

Schmoop said...

Songbird: If I get a card from you of course I will put it on top...right after I have the envelope tested for anthrax.

Yes, I know that Ryno is mine. Same sense of humor, same charm, same big ears and smelly feet. Cheers!!

Desert Songbird said...

I did indeed send a card, but I addressed it to Schmoop...

...

*blink, blink*

BWAHAHAHAHAHA!

Schmoop said...

Songbird: Well you and Schmoop just enjoy your big ol' love fest...Don't worry 'bout me!!

Unknown said...

Or, it could be the f ‘C’s’:

CARDS, CHILD, CARTOON, CONVERSE, & CONTAINER-WINE

I realize I’m pushing hard on that 5th one.

Schmoop said...

Nick: Just like a man of the cloth to try and change everything around. ; ) Cheers!!

Mimi Lenox said...

So THAT'S why Vinny wanted my address. I really must go to the mailbox. How cute that you have them all together like that.

Enjoy your weekend. Sounds like a snuggly warm time. And your son is adorable!

Schmoop said...

Mimi: Thanks, and we must have had a psychic moment because I just left a comment on your site. Cheers!!

Unknown said...

Cute kid. And let us not get started on the talk of sizing...you could probably go on for hours.
Love the music on Youtube :)
Shatner still isn't the "man" though you will never convince me!

Schmoop said...

Sassy: Thanks, I thinkk he is. When I was trying to size those pics to where I wanted them I came down with pixel envy.

Thanks for checking out my You Tube site; the only man that rocks more than me is Shatner. Cheers!!

Sandee said...

Note to self: Don't ever under any circumstances give the Matt-Man your address. Bwahahahahah. Have a great day. :)

Schmoop said...

Sandee: I'm not that bad...I'll cook a nice meal and clean your house before I run out with all of your valuables.

Matt-Man..."The Clean Culinary Crook." Cheers and have a good one!!

the Book of Keira said...

Marc Jacobs (the clothing designer) dressed up as a life sized camel's toe for his Christmas party this year.It was hysterical.

This is a great post... chock full of goodies. I shall be emailing my Christmas cards this year as the graphic designer in me needs a project. Maybe it'll be a cartoon card but I doubt it. Maybe my tits? More likely.

Missile toe... hee hee.

Schmoop said...

108: Mmmmmmmmm Camel Toe. Well I will be sending out something along the same lines, but I doubt that a picture of my tits would be as sexy. Cheers Hot Stuff!!

Marilyn said...

Careful, blogging while intoxicated is safe and fun but it makes spelling that much more difficult.

Travis Cody said...

BUI? Blogging under the influence?

Great looking kid...your pride is justified I would say.

Regrettably we'll be missing the live show tomorrow...I hate to be absent!

Schmoop said...

Marilyn: I have plenty of trouble spelling and typing when I am sober. Cheers!!

Travis: BUI...There are plenty of worse offneses. Thanks about the Ryno comment, and Cheers!!

Mo and The Purries said...

Great pic of Ryno!
Handsome young chap.
And I mean that in a proud-paternal way, not in a NAMBLA way...

Missile Toe - Bwah!

Schmoop said...

Mo: HA...Yes, I knew that Mo. Too Funny. I am enjoying the snow and ice storm as I type this. Cheers my good man.

And I meant that in a friend kinda way, not in a take me by the hand and call me Sally kinda way. Cheers!!

Mo and The Purries said...

Dear Sally,
I wonder how many google searches for NAMBLA there will be from my comment???
Cheers!
mo

Schmoop said...

Mo: I guess I'll drop my lawsuit to get full custody, thanks alot...Damn!!

Cheesy said...

Crap... Ryno is taller than me... sigh.

Please play frizbee with the pups if you come for the summer looting?? Thanks....

Schmoop said...

Cheesy: Yeah, but your hair is that tall as well. Cheers!!

Anonymous said...

Seeing there is no chance of me being able to listen to the show (I spend my blog reading time trying to get an insomniac 5ft 2 year old to sleep) I will, in the spirit of the occasion, and because 'nekkid' is my absolute favourite word of the moment, think of you next time I am nekkid.

Deal?

Kelley

Schmoop said...

Kelley: How could I pass on a deal like that? Cheers Kelley!!

Laura said...

Add me to those who think Ryan is very cute! Cute meaning soon-to-be -handsome and breaking hearts everywhere.

Inky will have to do some big high kicks to get smooches under that missile toe. Well, I guess he probably just needs to get waist high, huh?

Enjoy the rest of your weekend, Matt-Man!

Schmoop said...

Laura: Thanks Laura...I guess I have good looking spermies. Inky, being a stick figure, is very flexible. Cheers, and I hope your cold is better.

katherine. said...

missle toe....rolling my eyes (but of course I will use it later and probably not give you any credit..)

you son is a cutie...and taller than me ...