Oy Vay!!
A month from yesterday, February 7th to be exact, I will be turning 44.
I think I actually turned 44 yesterday.
I drank for awhile, cooked a magnificent sausage and stuffing casserole, drank some more, and then…
Passed Out Fell Asleep!!
Today? I am a bit hungover.
I have no qualms about getting older. In many ways, I like it, but man, some aspects of aging are a bitch.
I just can’t drink like I used to. Part of my inability to party is because I now weigh 182 lbs. rather than 265 lbs., but mostly, it’s age…and/or mileage.
I had a very funny post in my head for today, but my imbibing prevented me from posting at my usual midnight time.
I was lying on Kelly, snoozing in an alcohol induced state of lullaby.
Oy Vay, indeed.
Funny thing about age. Even the dream I had last night was different than usual.
I was dreaming about some hot, young chick. Frickin’ smokin' hot she was.
I didn’t have sex with her though. You know why?
Because I asked her how old she was and she told me 17. So I walked away…leaving her lying on a bed in all of her smoldering nakedness.
I guess as I approach 44 I can’t even break the law in my dreams, let alone get laid. How sad.
Anyway…I am horny as hell now. I am always horny when I am hungover. I have no idea why. But I do know Schmoop may be getting hurt today.
If not Schmoop, then the cat better not turn her back to me.
Yeahhhhhh. Now that's what I'm talkin' 'bout.
A month from yesterday, February 7th to be exact, I will be turning 44.
I think I actually turned 44 yesterday.
I drank for awhile, cooked a magnificent sausage and stuffing casserole, drank some more, and then…
Today? I am a bit hungover.
I have no qualms about getting older. In many ways, I like it, but man, some aspects of aging are a bitch.
I just can’t drink like I used to. Part of my inability to party is because I now weigh 182 lbs. rather than 265 lbs., but mostly, it’s age…and/or mileage.
I had a very funny post in my head for today, but my imbibing prevented me from posting at my usual midnight time.
I was lying on Kelly, snoozing in an alcohol induced state of lullaby.
Oy Vay, indeed.
Funny thing about age. Even the dream I had last night was different than usual.
I was dreaming about some hot, young chick. Frickin’ smokin' hot she was.
I didn’t have sex with her though. You know why?
Because I asked her how old she was and she told me 17. So I walked away…leaving her lying on a bed in all of her smoldering nakedness.
I guess as I approach 44 I can’t even break the law in my dreams, let alone get laid. How sad.
Anyway…I am horny as hell now. I am always horny when I am hungover. I have no idea why. But I do know Schmoop may be getting hurt today.
If not Schmoop, then the cat better not turn her back to me.
When I feel puny like this. A little Tyra always makes me feel better...
On second thought...I'd rather have a whole lotta Schmoop.
Yeahhhhhh. Now that's what I'm talkin' 'bout.
Cheers!!
44 comments:
I often think about how many vodkas I USED to be able to throw down versus how many I can keep down NOW. It's amazing and frustrating at the same time.
Yeah, I wouldn't trade the wisdom I've gained, but shit! What I wouldn't give to have my old body back!
Songbird: My body isn't that bad. (I mean other than the smoking thing) I actually weigh less than I did as a Senior in High School. Hell after Lent I'll probably be down to 175.
But...My mind wanders more, and when drinking I can't stay up past 10. I see Early Bird Specials of minute steaks and creamed corn in my near future. Cheers!!
It's a good thing you're not feeling blue in addition to the green. Then you'd just feel and look like shit.
I would have thought that the sausage and stuffing casserole would soaked up a bit of that wine.
I hope feel better.
Songbird: Ha. Yeah, I don't look too good in puce. Cheers!!
Michele: It would have, but I didn't eat. I served Schmoop a big plate full but I was in party mode. Or at least I thought I was. Feelin' better already, thank ya. Cheers Michele!!
Feeling a bit of green around the gills, are me, Matt-Man, me boy?
Following up on Desert Songbird’s comment, have you ever drank Russian vodka with a Russian? I did once, 30-soome-odd years ago. He was a Soviet army officer and I was a U.S. army officer and our meeting was peaceful. (Thank God).
Anyway, I followed his lead and sprinkled pepper on the vodka, which sank to the bottom of the glass. The Russkie told me that unwanted and terrible tasting oils that are indigenous to Russian vodka attach themselves to the pepper and sink to the bottom.
There comes a time in all our lives when even the pepper treatment doesn’t make the booze fir to drink.
As for you turning 44 on 7 February, one week after than—Valentine’s Day, to be exact—I shall celebrate my 63rd birthday. You realize, young Matt-Man, that that makes me old enough to be your daddy.
Nick: Ha. Interesting story. I partied with a German guy once. And a chick from Sweden once. But I never knew that about the pepper.
Maybe you are my dad. You are pretty funny on most ocassions. I'll make sure to make a note about your birthday. Cheers Nick!!
Hmmmmmmm... Well, unless your mother's name is Susan I probably ain't your daddy.
Nick: Okay thanks. I can cross you off of my list. Cheers Nick!!
44, all I can think of is BOOBS? What the hell HA!
At this point when I take a shot of NyQuil before bed I wake up feeling like I have been on a three day bender.
Is it okay if I print out that pic of Schmoop? Just to have. ;-)
Man you little whiny b**tard...
Get the hell up...do a shooter and get back to writing...
44!?!?!? You are a puppy and I will drink you under the table...
Lu: Welcome to my world. I constantly have boobs on the mind. Cheers Pal!!
Jay: Ny-Quil is the bomb. And yes, print away. I have more of them if ya want them. I owe them to ya since we never took that Christmas shot for ya. Cheers Jay!!
Bond: I doubt that you can drink me OR Schmoop under the table. When I say I can't stay up past 10 P.M., it's because I start at 8 A.M.
Mick has first hand knowledge of my drinking practices when I am off for three days. However, it's nothing I'm proud of......Okay, yeah it is. Cheers!!
...that photo of Schmoop...better than Elizabeth Taylor in Cat On A Hot Tin Roof...
Why did you change the pic? Here is an idea, put up a slide show of them...tap tap tap waiting :)
Phfrankie: Ha. I was gonna post a pic of the lovely Mizz Taylor just for you, but couldn't find one that jumped out at me. (I was rushed)
But, I am sure Schmoop, knowing your affinity for her (we talked about it this morning) will be more than flattered. Cheers P-Man!!
Lu: Ha. I forgot about the pic that is currently up. I always have liked it, remembered it, and just decided to put it up. You would be quite amused if you knew why Schmoop doesn't like this one. Cheers Lu!!
Cheer up Matt! The day after you turn 44, I turn 40. Fortunately my birthday flies under pretty much everyones radar. Which is good cause. Both of my grandparents last good days out of bed prior to dying? My birthday dinner at moms.
My birthday is more lethal than your WIR ;)
WTF is up with blogger today? Double comments suck!
Starr: I have had problems with Blogger for 2 days. Frickin' Bastards.
Anyhoo...Your birthday hasn't flown under MY radar and I knew you will be turning the big 4-0. Oh yeah, there will be things going on here at BR on Feb 8th. Cheers!!
Gah!
Just don't drop dead, mmk?
Starr: Could I get a picture of you naked? Just to enhnace the birthday post of course. It would be for the readers enjoyment, not for mine. Cheers!!
Starr, you and Matt are always going to be younger than I am; I face #47 in just a couple of weeks.
Ugh.
Some days I feel sooooo much older.
hmmm, was the 17 year old in your dream also named Nikki?? hee hee
I think I could drink you under the table too!
My 30's were hella chaotic. My 40's better put out to make up for that shit.
Songbird: Well...you are old. Bada Bing. Cheers!!
Snugs: Bring it on. We'll drink til we can't. The Bagwine digs are open for your challenge. Cheers Snugs!!
Starr: Good luck with that. If your 40's don't put out for ya, I will. Cheers!!
Could you imagine the hangover if you drank your wednesday beers all between 6:ooPM and 10:ooPM?
Your still a young'n to me. I do remember the days waiting for the store to open, twelve pack in hand at 9:00AM, in the woods dropping trees, cutting and splitting and hot dogs and friends then back to to the store to help finish off the evening party.....whew!!!!
Micky: Day two of my three days off. Oh yeah, I'm buzzed. You need to come back up, and this time there will be no holds barred. Cheers Mick!!
All right so now I HAVE to know why Schmoop doesn't like this one? Is it because those were the panties you wore?
TB: Nooooo. I'll email ya. Cheers Sexy!!
With all that green goin' on, I just thought you were practicing up for St. Paddy's!
:-)
Giggle: Oh Baby, Damn Right...Just a couple of months away!! Hope you are doing well, sexy. Cheers GP!!
Anytime dude...anytime...Nancy and I will tag-team against you and Schmoop and when it is all over we will tuck you two kids into bed.
Bond: In the infamous words of our Commander-in-Chief:
Bring it On.
CHeers!!
Try staying sober for eight or nine months and then drinking... I only drink when I visit my mother. I don't know if this says something about me, or Mom.
44??????
Call me in 6 years you big whiner........ then you can cry.
and did schmoop give you permission to show everyone her personal space??
oh, well, never mind then.....
Marilyn: I definitely think it says something about your Mom...No, really. Cheers!!
VM: I took the picture it's half mine. At least that is what I said as she was hitting me. Cheers!!
Hapi: That's so nice. I'll be sure to do the same . You made me so Hapi. Cheers!!
I hit 45 in 3 months and 2 days. Thank you for the Tyra. Don't forget the Jessica on 11 April.
Cheers!
Travis: I'll make a note of that. Mmmmmm, Jessica. Cheers Trav!!
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