God Damn It!! I Do Loooove My Job!!

I worked at the Drive-Thru from 11 A-7 P yesterday. It was a tad chilly outside, but all in all a pleasant Sunday at work.

The sun was out for a bit. For the most part, the customers driving through were cordial. And…

My ribs which I banged up last week at work on the trash dumpster, were not excruciatingly painful.

With 30 minutes left in my shift, I was walking back from said dumpster of pain when I noticed a car pulling into the driveway.

I recognized the car and driver…an elderly lady who, while a bit wacky, is sweet enough. The car stopped before entering the Drive-Thru.

I presumed she wanted me to get inside safely. I did so, and walked into the office to drop a box off.

As I was turning around to go back out into the Drive-Thru, I was smacked in the ears by a thunderous, grating, metallic sound.

I rushed out and this is what I saw…

That’s right folks…the elderly woman had driven up onto the damn, raised tile floor and almost crashed into the glass doors of the beer coolers!!

While not one to ordinarily verbally abuse a 3,000 year old woman, my initial response was an atomic banshee scream of, “God Damn It!!”

I hurried to the car yelling, "God Damn It!!" And yet, the lady was still driving forward!!

As I visualized my knee caps about to be in much worse shape than my bruised ribs, I shouted…

“Put the God Damn Car in Park, Betty (not her real name), God Damn It!!”

Shaking and nearly in tears, she replied…

“It is now, honey. Oh honey I am so sorry. I cut it too close and hit the gas instead of the brake.”

I got “Betty” out of the car, sat her down in the office, and went to carefully back the car out of its position without hitting the 7-Up cooler.

Holy Shit, she missed it by that much…


I backed the car off of the floor and pulled it up. I then shut down the entrance to the Drive-Thru.

“Betty” came out of the office and said…”Are you closing honey, ‘cause I really need to buy a pack of cigarettes.”

God Damn…

After I closed for good, I called the owner, Drive-By Mike. I told him what had happened. After his laughter subsided, he said…

“You backed the car off of the floor?”

And I said, “Well I sure as hell wasn’t going to let HER do it!!”

And then Mike continued…

“First you bust your ribs and now “Betty” crashes into the place, what happens the next time you work, a terrorist attack?”

Holy Cow, I don’t know what’s gonna happen next, but God Damn, I do loooove my job.

It’s certainly exciting alright, and I get to do it all over again later today.

Cheers!!