Bagwine Racial Equality Week: Non-Caucasian Muffins I'd Love To Butter

Okay Kiddies…The past couple of days I have discussed my equal opportunity hate for a handful of black people and white people.

Today and tomorrow it’s all about my equal opportunity love for the ladies. Today on Bagwine Racial Equality Week (BREW), I give you…

Non-Caucasian Muffins That I’d Love To Butter!!

And folks…I am not going to rehash my ancient, ongoing drooling love for Tyra Banks. I am going to spotlight some lesser known ladies.

Alison Stewart (top) and Tamron Hall (bottom, mmmmm, bottom): Why do I put these two lovely ladies together? Well first and foremost, it would be far more fun to have sex with two lovely Nubian knockouts than one, and secondly…they both work for MSNBC.

Oh how I long for them to be naked together at the news desk with me in studio as their lead story. Between the playful cuteness of Alison and the smoldering hotness of Tamron, I’d be spewing love juice quicker and longer than the news ticker at the bottom of the screen.

Call me Matt-Bisco ‘cause I’m going to be the cream filling in the Oreo of love with those two.

Heidi Zadeh: Many of you may not know Mizz Zadeh. She is an Iranian born model who lives in Denmark. Being Iranian, she could be either Arab or Persian…Muslim or Zoroastrian…Crazy or Sane!!

Plus, now she’s a Dane. A Scandinavian!! She could be a Lutheran. Sweet Baby Jeebus!! Spreading her legs apart would result in opening a Pandora’s Box of ethnicities, creeds, and desires.

Oh how I’d love to meet Heidi in wonderful, wonderful Copenhagen, swim in her body and explore every fjord of her flesh.

Jeanette Littledove: Mmmmmm. Jeanette…The prototypical porn star, now retired. She claimed to be a full-blooded Cherokee Indian. Whether that is true or not, I don’t care. Either way, she has a set of heap big wampums, and I dream of running my pole beans up her wigwam.

Spending a naked night with her would result in me crying a trail of tears…of ecstasy. How, Baby, How.

Betty Nguyen: This vixen of Vietnamese descent rocks my world every Saturday morning on CNN. She sits at the anchor desk and one knee is always showing. She lights my temperature up with Yellow Fever.

America is a better place with you here…And America would be even better if you were naked…with me. Habba Habba, Me Love You Long Time Betty.

Shirley Hemphill: Hey, Hey, Hey…I grew up yanking my wank to this bodacious babe of “What’s Happening” fame. What’s not to like?

I know she’s gone over the rainbow, but man…how I’d love to bounce atop this buoyant black beauty of bootyliciousness. Boo Yah, Bitches!! Best thing about Shirl?

When she was done humpin’ my stump…she could bring me a po’ boy sammich with a side of slaw. Want your tip Shirley? Matt-Man gots it right c’here.

So there you have it folks…some lesser know women of color that I’d like to cover with my white body.

Tomorrow? White Blogging Babes That I’d Love To Bang.

Yeah right…If I listed those of you who I’d like to have sex with, the result would be…

I’d be slapped by some; cursed by others; and mocked by all.

So, I’ll figure something out as to how to wrap up Bagwine Racial Equality Week. Enjoy your Thursday.

Cheers!!