Monday, November 02, 2009

The Egg of the Phoenix

There seems to be a disturbance and/or some kind of alteration in the Blogos-Force.

Not necessarily a evil deviation of the blogging paradigm, in fact, this supernatural event tends to be a harbinger of peace, humor, and harmony.

It's as if something or someone who had died has been resurrected.

It is as though the sacred Bagwine has been purged of much of its toxicity, been eliminated from the host, and will now continue its ritual of purification on its own terms.

Praise Jeebus...At 5:45 P.M., Monday November 2nd...

The Matt-Man crossed back over the river Styx, cheated the flesh hound Cerberus, and once again dwells in the Holy House of Bagwine.

So let it be written; so let it be done.

Cheers!!

41 comments:

snugs said...

welcome home! stay well!

Dianne said...

Praise Baby Jeebus
Bless the Holy Mother
and
Pass the WIR

Welcome home Matty

Schmoop said...

Snugs: Thanks. I shall do my best to remain well. However right now, I feel like I've had the shit beat out of me. Cheers Snugs!!

Dianne: Thank ya Sexy. That picture of the tank full of my infected lung funk turns you on, doesn't it? Cheers Bay-by!!

David said...

Well glory be and praise baby jeebus.

Was there a lengthy parade of vehicles including those with lights flashing in the procession of the homecoming?

Surely nothing less would be acceptable for the first son of the greater Bagwine community.

Schmoop said...

David: A parade and celebration had quickly been planned, but I, not wanting to disturb my soon to be former, fellow patients, asked the celebrants and paparazzi to respect my privacy and the privacy of the afflicted. It was the least I could do. Cheers David!!

Phfrankie Bondo said...

...THAT'S what I'm talkin' about!...Welcome home, Good Sir!...

Schmoop said...

Phfrankie: Thanks P-Man. Perhaps it was the ecard you sent to the hospital today that forced me to turn on the charm and get sent home today. That's a story in itself. Cheers P-Man!!

Michele said...

It's about damn time. Schmoop did an admirable job in your place but her heart just wasn't into it. We're happy to hear you are back and on the mend.

Schmoop said...

Michele: Schmoop did a fine job in spite of her huge heart being filled with the sadness of missing me...or something. Glad to be back, Cheers Michele!!

MysteryChick said...

Geez Matt! I return from my hiatus to find out that you're in the hospital, it was horrible.

Shmoop did a great job but you were sorely missed.

Take care of yourself, please! We cannot handle another disturbance in the blog-force.

Tug said...

Good to have you back Matt! Did the nurses live through your visit?

Schmoop said...

Rat: I think we both know the inherent problem that lies within your threat...I'd dig having you kick my ass. Cheers Rat!!

Mystery: I know, but what I can I do? It's wunnerful to see you back. I dig that. I'll try to avoid injury or disease. Cheers Chick!!

Tug: Mmmmmmm. Tug. They lived, but I do have a couple of funny stories about them which I will impart in the near future. Cheers Tug!!

katherine. said...

I bet the legions of thankful bagwiners are in praise.

Glad you got out of the hospital, Mateo.

take it easy for a while...
no reoccurrences por favor.

You owe Schmoop big time!

Jay said...

Cool beans! Did they let you go, or did you just finally rip the tubes out yourself and leave?

Glad you're home dude.

Schmoop said...

Kat: I'm glad too, and I am not returning to the Beer Mine until Friday afternoon, so I'll be takin' it easy. I have to take two anti-biotics several times a day for 4-6 weeks. My affliction went far beyond Pneumonia. Cheers and Thanks for Eveything Kat!!

Jay: You adorable Viking, you. I'll post about how I managed to get myself out of there soon. Cheers and Thanks Buddy!!

David said...

btw - we will need to hear all about the sponge baths and I'm pretty sure that one guy named Scott Oglesby wants to know all about the times they forced you to have grand colonics but you didn't hear it from me.

Anonymous said...

Yay! So glad you are set free! I hope you are feeling much better.

Cinnamon Girl said...

Went beyond pneumo eh? Was it a runny nose too :P Glad you are back you stubborn ass :P

Schmoop said...

David: No sponge bath stories, but plenty of funny and quite odd stories will be shared. No calonics either, so Scott may be disappointed. Cheers David!!

Lady: It is nice to be home. Still sore as hell but this too shall pass. Cheers D!!

Cheesy: Ha. What is with you people and sponge baths? Are you all related to Bill O'Reilly? Cheers my Friend!!

Schmoop said...

Starr: Nope...Something completely unrelated that hit me at the time that I said the pain was too much. Hope the KId is doing well. Cheers Starr!!

Phfrankie Bondo said...

...What?!?! You had a sponge bath with Bill O'Reilly?!?!...

Schmoop said...

Phfrankie: If that were the case, I would be dead. Struck down by my guilt and my own hand. Cheers P-Man...I am off to sleep!!

Lu' said...

Woo Hoo er uhm WOO HOO! Hey there bud-a-rooney welcome home. I bet the trip across the street was both the quickest and longest trip you've taken.

Candice said...

Welcome home Matty boy. Stay well and take it easy for the next few days.

Blow jobs only. Uh, receiving, that is....

Red Green said...

Oh Joy, let there be bagwine!

Scott Oglesby said...

Congratulations on a conscious exit from a hospital, that’s one hell of an accomplishment in this day and age! I hope you know that it was all because of me. I laid hands on you from across the pond, spoke of thy name, and so it came to pass. Praise Jesus!! Did they ever figure out how the pneumonia started??

Dana said...

*BIG GRIN*

Schmoop said...

Lu: Ha. And you would be correct on both counts Lu. Cheers Pal!!

Candice: I will be resting up on a costly hiatus until Friday afternoon. Thanks for the clarification on the BJs. Cheers Candice!!

Red: I see some in my near future. Purely for pain of course. Cheers Mick!!

Schmoop said...

Scott: I knew you were laying hands upon me for I could smell the cheap Sangria on your breath and feel the Spanish Olive Oil on your palms.

As for the pneu? I evidently contracted from another. My strain is relatively communicable. Cheers Scott!!

Dana: I want to thank you for finally taking the needle out of the right side of the Voodoo Doll of me that you keep. Cheers Dana!!

Ken said...

Good morning Matthew...
nice to have you back!

Is that a Atrium lung juicer they let you take home?

DILLIGAF said...

Seein' as I only stumbled across you after you were hospitalised, coming back is the least you could do!!!...;-)

Keep well old bean

4D

Schmoop said...

Micky: I wish they had. It contained nearly a half gallon of my juicy essence. Cheers Mick!!

Four: I saw your comments 4D, and I thank you much. I hope you continue to stop by and I will be reciprocating as soon as I can get around better. Hell, it's taking me forever just to type out a short post this morning!! Thanks again, and Cheers!!

Lu' said...

Good morning Matt-Man :)right on!




Hey ya know this would be a great time to quit smoking, I'm just sayin...

Schmoop said...

Lu: No need to tell me Lu...I have been good so far on the cigarette front. Cheers Lu!!

Phfrankie Bondo said...

...If I just got out of the hospital after more than a week the first things I would want are:

1) a butt

2) a beer

3) a sausage, mushroom, olive, and onion pizza.

Schmoop said...

Phfrankie:

a) I'm fine just holding on to one.

b) Hell yeah, nothing wrong with that.

c) Actually, one of the few things that the hospital dining services made well was their personal pizza. So a fix is not needed in that area.

Cheers P-Man!!

Unknown said...

Did Charon return your coin?

Schmoop said...

Nick: I let him keep it Nick. Charon isn't a bad fellow, it's that damn dog that is such a wicked pisser. Cheers Nick!!

Unknown said...

Cerberus ain't so bad if you know how to deal with him. Here's what you do:

Face Cerberus carrying a big, raw, bloody steak in each hand. At the same moment, throw each of the steaks, one to the left and one to the right of the two-headed monster dog. While Cerberus is arguing with himself which steak to retrieve first, you simply stroll past the idiot.

OK?

Schmoop said...

Nick: Ha. Kinda like most people I know. Good advice as usual Nick. Cheers to ya!!

Marilyn said...

Yay! Scrolling up for details. I've been out of town the last couple of days.