Wednesday, February 10, 2010

Schmoop Needs a Shove

I need your help. We are snowed in. My BFF/OSP, Schmoop (pictured above circa 1988) is home today, and I thought this would be a good time for her to write a post.

She hasn't done that in awhile, so dammit, she should post something on here for Thursday.

Tell her that you want her...that you need her...that you desire her to write something.

Any encouragement would be most appreciated.


The Bagwine Staff




Bond said...

Write some crap will ya?

how was that Matty?

Mike said...

We don't need any writing. We want pictures. The ones Matt-man keeps in his wallet.

Jay said...

Dear Schmoop,

Please babe! It's time for you to write a post again. My desire to see the words that your sexy fingers tap out on the keyboard must be satisfied. My nipples are hard with anticipation as to what you might write.

When I read your posts, I imagine you here, sitting on my lap in my old ratty Arkansas Razorbacks football jersey (#18 Ron Calcagni's number when I was a kid) and NOTHING ELSE telling me the story personally. Sure, your story gets posted here, but I know that it's actually meant just for me.

And as you tell me your story, while sitting there on my lap, I get this warm feeling inside of me. A feeling of love and lust combined with happiness and joy. And a slight tightening of my pants. Well, there would be if I were wearing any.

So come on Schmoop! Snuggle up with me and tell me a story babe. My penis is tingling at the very thought of it.

Schmoop said...

Vin: I will do my best.

Mike: All the pictures in his wallet are stuck together!

Jay: Will you marry me??? Oh, and share your tequila??? Go Razorbacks!!

Doc said...

Hey Schmoop... I think you ought to detail a "Day in the life" with Matt-Man... Kind of a blow by blow (maybe bad choice of verbiage there) account of what you have to put up with on lets say your average weekend day with his Bag-whiney-ishness self.

katherine. said...

while I would love to read a pithy post from you...we do enjoy reading what you rant...

it may be more fun just to annoy Mateo and refuse.

Schmoop said...

Doc: That may be a thought, thanks!

Kat: Good to see you!! You might be on to something too, although, I said I would IF I get something out of it;)

Dana said...

I don't know Schmoop, Matt is being quite demanding these days, don't you think? First he make you learn about Twitter, then he wants a blog post out of you?

I'm with Kat! Maybe you should just irritate him instead!

3 Men and a Lady said...

Floating down the river? All right! I used to do that... so fun.

Yeah we need life w/Matt from your POV. Give us the dirt, lol.

Schmoop said...

Dana: I can't refuse him, he like, oh I don't know, a Sven-Jolly!!

Schmoop said...

3: Yea, that was actually 1984 when I was 18 and extremely STUPID!! Drinking, and tubing is no way to go thru life!! I'll see what I can come up with!!

Dianne said...

I yearn for you Schmoop ...

Desert Rat said...

Puleeeeeeze! Please, please, please write something. The image of Jay with a "tightening in his pants" is too much to ignore!

Tell Matt you want... a back rub, and a soak in a hot bath with an appropriate beverage - you know, to prime the pump.

Micky-T said...

It has been awhile Schmoop since you had a good rant. Don't do it for him, do it for us.

Schmoop said...

Diane: As I do for you. Loves to you, and bless Mia.

Rat: Jay is hard to resist, isn't he? Hee Hee, I said hard!!! Why yes, I am 12 by the way!!

Schmoop said...

Micky: Mick. It is done. And it's something I think about.

Karen said...

Do it! Do it! Do it!

Four Dinners said...

Hang on schmoopy, schmoopy hang on
Hang on schmoopy, schmoopy hang on

Schmoopy lives in a very bad part of town
and everybody else, tries to put my schmoopy down
Schmoopy I don't care, what your daddy do
Cuz you know schmoopy, girl, I'm in love with you

and so I say now

Hang on schmoopy, schmoopy hang on
Hang on schmoopy, schmoopy hang on

Schmoopy let your hair down, ooo
Let it hang down on me
Schmoopy let your hair down, girl
Let it hang down on me, yeah

come on schmoopy (come on, come on)
oh come on schmoopy (come on, come on)
oh come on schmoopy (come on, come on)
oh come on schmoopy (come on, come on)

well it feels so good (come on, come on)
you know it feels so good (come on, come on)
well shake it, shake it, shake it schmoopy (come on, come on)
shake it, shake it, shake it yeah (come on, come on)

hang on schmoopy, schmoopy hang on
(yeah) (yeah) (yeah) (yeah)
hang on schmoopy, schmoopy hang on
(yeah) (yeah) (yeah) (yeah)
hang on schmoopy, schmoopy hang on

4D x

Schmoop said...

Karen: It's done, and ready to be published!

Four: I have read most of your blog posts, and may I say sir, that I fucking bloody love them you crazy bloke!! That comes from an Irish girl!!

Simstone said...

I don't know you but by god any woman that drinks a beer while tubing has got to have several blog posts up her sleeves (or bra strap) that she can share.

That comes from one river tuber to another.

Four Dinners said...

Love yer to babe x

As does Caz a girlie way of course...;-)

Now POST THE F*CK*R!!!!!!

Schmoop said...

Sim: Well...the tubing thing is another post! Thanks for commenting, and I hope you're tubing days were better than mine!

Four: I love Caz too, she is adorable!! I have to wait for the MAN to post this, as I do not know how!! Hang on!