Tuesday, June 22, 2010

Tuesday Meanderings

Well folks, summer is officially here, and during this week, which proceeds the week leading up to the July 4th Weekend, I typically phone it in.

It’s as close as I get to taking a Blog vacation. So today, I have some random thoughts and musings. Deal with it.

You know what’s cool about working 10-9 on Mondays and Tuesdays? When I leave the Beer Mine on Tuesday night, over half of my work week is already done. I dig that.

Speaking of the Beer Mine, our fearless leader, Drive-By Mikey, while not in the best of moods yesterday, did manage to give a bunch of shit to our ice delivery guy, Luis...

Luis was unloading the ice as it rained and Mikey said stuff to Luis like…

“Last week, I told you that you had been getting slower, so it must be that you joined a union. Since you are working in the rain, I guess you haven’t.”

And he continued…

“Leave it to a Mexican, to think it’s a good idea to stop at a place that needs 120 bags of ice unloaded when it’s raining.


Hell Luis, you could have stopped at a place that only needed two or three until the rain stopped.”

Mikey spouted off some other stuff which I will not repeat here, but I was crying from laughing so hard.

As I mentioned, the wondrous, firework-filled, 4th of July Weekend is rapidly approaching.

If you have never seen the series that the History Channel typically runs on the 4th of July about the American Revolution, make sure you check it out.

I’ve seen it three times, and will watch it again this year. It is excellent.

The Beer Mine and in fact the Bagwine digs, may have a special guest stopping by this weekend. Whoever could it be..?

If she does make it down, I will meet her with a smile on my face and a ruler in my hand.

I will smack her on the ass with the ruler, and then promptly take her into the cooler, and measure her nipples to see how long they get when in a 40 degree beer cooler.

I shall then take her home after I close, and feed her…Loosemeat Sandwiches you gutter snipes; I’ll feed her Loosemeat Sandwiches.


I hope she comes…comes to Bagwine. God...you guys, are whores!!

My old “buddy”, Uncle Charlie now dumps my comments when I leave one on his site. I am saddened. I hope he treats Robbie, Chip, and Ernie better than he does me.

One last thing…Thanks for letting Schmoop know how ya feel about her hair. She dug it, and so did I.

Have a wonderful day all. It’s gonna be another hot one here. “See” ya all tonight or tomorrow.

Cheers!!

18 comments:

Mrs. D said...

I can't believe the 4th is already almost here! Time flies... What did you say to get your comments banned? You must have gotten under his skin good, LOL.

Mike said...

I forgot about Uncle Charlie. I went there, I came back. I'm glad I forgot.

Scott Oglesby said...

I used to love working a couple of 12 hour days and then taking is easy the rest of the week. But working anything close to the 3-11 shifts I used to have to work on the turnpike is just depressing.

That lady in the Bagwine tank doesn’t have a bra on. I thought you should know.

Matt-Man said...

D: I was thinking the same thing when I realized that the 4th is nearlty upon us. Sheesh. My comment to Charlie was a tame remark about the U.S. policy towards Israel. It was nothing inflammatory...well, to a sane person anyway. Cheers D!!

Mike: I can't stay away. He's my favorite mistake. Cheers Mike!!

Scott: I can imagine a late day shift on The 'Pike would be less than satisfying. She doesn't have a bra on does she? Holy Cow, I hadn't noticed. Cheers Scott!!

Dana said...

I'm thinking you'll never get any visitors if you keep threatening to measure their nipples and feed them loosemeat!

Maybe that's why uncle Charlie doesn't like you!

Doc said...

Sounds like it could get interesting this weekend!!

Matt-Man said...

Dana: Okay, maybe you're right. I'l merely stare at the nipples and serve her Hot Dog Helper. And yeah, maybe Charlie doesn't like nipple play. Cheers Dana!!

Doc: I hope so, but it can't get too interesting, I'll be on my period. What? Cheers Doc!!

Dianne said...

the 'my three sons' reference is pure gold

Schmoop's hair looks hawt

Matt-Man said...

Di: I dig the hair, and Charlie? He's a moron. Cheers Sexy!!

Phfrankie Bondo said...

...carry on, Captain Bagwine, Sir!...

Evil Twin's Wife said...

We sit in our front yard and watch the fireworks from the river at St. Albans. We hang out, drink, get eaten alive by bugs, all that good stuff. :-) And, don't have to deal with traffic!

Joker_SATX said...

Drive By Mikey must have originated from Southern Texas...That's all we do down here is to make fun of the Mexicans. Problem is then they go on strike and then we have nothing to do because they control everything down here......

The Dish said...

The fireworks for Normal, IL are at the park right across the creek. But the tiny town where The Husband works has a much better show. I usually meet him there after work and drink a few road sodies on the way. I love the 4th!!!

Matt-Man said...

Phfrankie: I shall do just that. Cheers P-Man!!

Evil: All the bug biting in the world is worth not having to deal w/ the traffic. Cheers ETW!!

Joker: No Joker, he was born and lived in Bagwine all his life. He and Luis have been cutting up together for quite some time. Cheers Joker!!

Matt-Man said...

Dish: Our parks depsrtment puts on a great show for a city this size. I dig the 4th of July as well, and by golly I am off work that day this year. Boo Yah!! Cheers Dish!!

~Isobel~DingoDoll said...

Fu*k Uncle Charlie! Just send ME your postings and I will cheerfully forward them on to the Jackass.


Um, I'm going to hazard a guess that the mystery guest of the Bagwine area is a follower of BWR, yes, you have your very own acronym!!!

Please PLEEEEZE tell us what Mikey said to Luis!!! If you don't wanna then email it to us rubberneckers and busybodies. If it made you almost pass out, I will probably laugh til I piss.

Schmoop: Kickin color on ya, I got lucky (no, pervs, not like THAT. I found a whole bag of colors from sally's in the trunk of my car. Woot, I hope they havent expired or mutated.

You guys enjoy your holiday, I'm gonna jump in a hot air balloon and yep I'm scared to death but rocked about it. MMMM fireworks and WIR from a balloon, very safe.

Cheers to youse, Matty&Schmoop! Happy HUMP day;) And be safe on the IOndependance celebrations!

~Isobel~DingoDoll said...

InDependence***

Matt-Man said...

Dingo: Ha. God I love you; you crack me up. Fireworks from a hot ait balloon? Holy Cow, now that..is..cool. Enjoy the hell out of that. Cheers Doll!!

Oh and yes, the visitor if she comes is Dana, and Uncle Charlie posts my comments again. I feel so loved. ; )~~