There’s a new sheriff in Political Pundit town, and her name is Leslie Marshall. Ha!! Sheriff…Marshall, See what I did there?
Mizz Marshall among other things, has a national radio show every weeknight.
When I get home from a long day at the Beer Mine, I pour a glass of WIR, fire up the computer, and listen to Leslie.
As her political punditry pulsates through my hard drive and breathily sings through my speakers, I swoon like a little school boy…a reform school boy.
My feelings for her are quite similar to what National Review’s Rich Lowry experienced for Sarah Palin when he watched Palin participate in the 2008 VP Debate:
“I’m sure I’m not the only male in America who, when Palin dropped her first wink, sat up a little straighter on the couch and said, “Hey, I think she just winked at me.”…it was so sparkling it was almost mesmerizing. It sent little starbursts through the screen and ricocheting around the living rooms of America.”
That’s so warm, so human, so parallel, because Lowry and Palin are just like Leslie and me. Well…
Except unlike Lowry, I’m not a nitwit neo-con suffering from short man’s syndrome and unlike Palin…
The lovely Leslie is not a vacuous, half baked, half term, GOP, Eski-Ho!!
No sir…Leslie and I are moderately Liberal and of course, Uber-Cute.
Marshall has even exchanged tweets with me. Our tender Twitter moments are precious to me. She has even tweeted me to call her.
Well, call her show. I always do, except for the one night when I was pretty damn drunk.
When I do call her show, I don’t feel like a mere ratings number, I feel like I am King of the World!!
For those reasons, Leslie Marshall is Hot and I Love Her!! In fact…
Before the ice delivery guy Luis, departed the Beer Mine on Monday, I slapped a sign on the back of his truck professing my love.
He caught me though, and had me take it off, but my will could not be denied, and I slapped it on the side of his truck seconds before he departed for his next of many stops…
I hope that Leslie reads this and lets me know how much she appreciates my tribute to her and the passion for her that stirs my soul. Ahhhhh.
I’m working 10-9 on this glorious Tuesday d’amour, so don’t none of ya chuckleheads try to move in on my Leslie during my absence.