Monday, January 24, 2011

Lent 2011: I Am Leaving My Walk Through The Wilderness Up To You

Every year at this time, I begin to think about something…

What should I give up for Lent?

This year, Lent begins relatively late (March 9th), but I have already begun to think about what 46 day quest of sacrifice and ultimate glory that I shall traverse this year.

In the past I have given up meat, and last year I gave up all forms of bread and pasta.

My willpower is such, that neither of those abstinences provide anything more than mere discomfort.

So…this year? I am setting my sights higher, and want to have a real challenge. I am asking you to help me.

Do you have any ideas as to what I should give up between Ash Wednesday and Easter Morning in order to test my holy mettle?

I have a few ideas…

I could give up meat (as I have done before).

I could give up bread/pasta (as I have done before).

Or…

I could give up one of the following:

Alcohol…That would be tough, especially since I live with a bitter, heathen woman.

Cigarettes…That would be even tougher. Oh Dear God, I do love my Marlboro Lights.

Sex…Ha…Just never mind that idea. I may live with a bitter, heathen woman, but damn…she’s hot!!

NOS/Energy Drinks…You may not see this as difficult, but trust me…NOS is my crack.

Cussing…Either in spoken or written form, this would probably be the most difficult in comparison to all of the aforementioned suggestions.

Blogging…That would be rough, and what fun would it be if I couldn’t post abut how fucking crazy I was going!?

So, those are some suggestions. Let me know what you think, or if you have something else in mind with which to torture me during the 46 days of Lent, lay it on me.

I’ll be home all day on this introspective Monday, so let me know what ya think.

Yours in Christ, and as always…

Cheers!!

31 comments:

Mike said...

Not sex. That's probably the only exercise you get. So we'll go for 'Cigarettes'. (I couldn't even type that yucky word. I had to cut and paste.)

You and Schmoop. That's right, the smokeless Bagwine duo.

Jay said...

The problem with choosing either alcohol or cigarettes is that they really go together. So, giving up one basically means giving up both.

So, I vote for both cigarettes and alcohol.

Matt-Man said...

Mike: I think about the smoking thing because I have been inspired by a person I recently met through Twitter who quit afew days ago and the money saved would be incredible. That's definitely a positive. Cheers Mike!!

Jay: Okay...now wait a minute Mister Man. Two quits was not an option. What are you trying to do to me!? Cheers Jay!!

Scott Oglesby said...

You know my vote is for alcohol. I think it will do you some good to exorcise whatever demons had you picking the Jets over the mighty, mighty Steelers. You could always give up both cigarettes and alcohol… you’d be shocked at how much better you’d feel! Do it!

Matt-Man said...

Scott: Last time I gave up alcohol and smokes, I was laying in a hospital bed with a tube in my side. I didn't feel all that good. Cheers Scott!!

Geeky Tai-Tai said...

Why not give up alcohol first, and then later you can give up cigarettes? When I've tried to quit smoking, but not drinking, I ended up drunk all of the time. It wasn't pleasant for me or anyone around me.

Matt-Man said...

Geeky: Ha. Some people say that I am only pleasant WHEN I'm drunk. I shall, however, take your suggestion under advisement, and thanks. Cheers Geeky!!

irene said...

I'm with Jay butts and booze!

Matt-Man said...

Irene: Please don't take my nippy bottle away. Cheers Irene!!

MysteryChick said...

Cigarettes, hands down my friend.

Raquel's World said...

I say Alcohol. Just because it would be interesting to observe you without any. You could always double up on the crack to fill the void.

Matt-Man said...

Chick: I think that other tha cussing, I think that would be the hardest to do and yet, ultimately the best thing to do for my health. Cheers Sexy!!

Raquel: Ha...Yeah, that would be pretty funny. For you guys, but not so much for me. Cheers Roc!!

Knight said...

I hesitate to suggest anythng because I don't want you to get depressed and boring as hell.
but...
If I were you I would try to kick the crack. That NOS shit is nasty and really messes up your system.
OR...
You could give up something REALLY hard and vow to only use it on Schmoop and not for self pleasure. Ha..yeah right. We don't want you to die!

Matt-Man said...

Knight: Ha. One of the reasons I like you so much is because I was going to suggest that I would only have sex with Schmoop and not go Hand Solo during Lent.

As for the liquid crack of NOS, I am already near the breaking point of only drinking one in a great while, 'cause yeah, it really fucks with my internals.

Cheers Beautiful!!

Desert Rat said...

Cigarettes. Hands down. Give it up for Lent and then just keep on going, m'dear. (I can't say alcohol, 'cause that would be hypocritical. No way that's happenin'!)

They'll be the most difficult AND you'll reap the greatest reward. I finally, FINALLY got Steve to quit his dip and cigars, 'cause kissing a smoker is like licking an ashtray. (In my humble opinion.)

Matt-Man said...

Rat: Yeah, in addition to the health benefit, I would save soooo much money by not smoking, but it would be hard, but we shall see.

Good for Steve, however, as Schmoop is a smoker too, I don't worry about the ashtray kissing, but the nicotine stains on my wanker are a bit disturbing looking. Hey-Oooooooooo. Cheers Adorable One!!

Beth said...

Bwahhhhhhhhhaaaaa! I hope not too disturbing;) Hey, you could give up the cookies and ice cream? Oh wait...that's me. My bad.

Matt-Man said...

Schmoop: The stains are merely a bit disturbing, my bout with gonorreah back in the 80's was much more disturbing looking. Give up the cookies and cream and suffer with me. Cheers and Zoooooves!!

Jay said...

Matt-Man said...

Scott: Last time I gave up alcohol and smokes, I was laying in a hospital bed with a tube in my side. I didn't feel all that good. Cheers Scott!!

I literally laughed out loud when I read that.

Desert Rat said...

Of COURSE it would be hard - WTFFD (What the fucking fuck, Dude) - man up for our Savior!

Matt-Man said...

Jay: Ha...I did too when I typed it. It's nice to have a similiar sense of humor. Cheers Funny Man!!

Rat: I shall try to. We'll see. I haven't decided yet. Maybe instead of the Lord Almighty promising me redemption if I quit smomking, I'd be more inclined to so if you prromised to kiss me when I did. Praise Jeebus!! Cheers Rat!!

Desert Rat said...

We could work something out but you'll have to pass it by Schmoop.

Matt-Man said...

Rat: I'm sure she'd be fine with it. She loves ya, and she'd dig the extra money for beer. It's a win-win. Well, except for you. ; )~ Cheers Lovely One!!

NIC said...

I ponce gave up the f-bomb... From the church until I was almost back to the office. I am not a good one to give advise on this subject. Best of luck to you.

Matt-Man said...

NIC: HA...As I said, cussing would actually be the hardest for me. I enjoy a well-timed "fucking idiot", or "dick twizzling fucknozzle". Thanks for commenting NIC. Cheers!!

sybil law said...

The smokes are the obvious choice, but man... rough.

Matt-Man said...

Whatever I choose it will be tough, but I want it to be..Funny thing? I'm not even Catholic anymore!! Cheers Sybil!!

Sodapop said...

I'm on day 9 without smoking...you've watched me suffer on Twitter and you're considering it! This is good news for me! Misery loves company, after all. If you give smoking up for Lent, I can commiserate with how miserable you are while you're doing it!

Personally? The benefits FAR out weight the bullshit I'm going through right now. I've saved $25.99 already since I quit on 1/15/11 (3.85 per pack @ 15 cigs per day). I've slept better, I smell better, although my coffee tastes worse right now :(, things taste better over all. Also, my apartment smells better and it's much cleaner (due to needing to keep busy when the urge hits!)

:) I know you could do it. I know you would enjoy the health benefits, the financial benefits, etc.

Kathy

Matt-Man said...

Sodapop: I am leaning that way. Other than cussing, it would be the most difficult, but also the most beneficial health wise and monetarily.

I have been inspired by you and your efforts in the brief time I have known you. Keep it up, and perhaps I will join you come March.

Thanks for the comment and Cheers Kathy!!

Dianne said...

I know giving something up for Lent is important to you and I respect that

I gave up the giving up for Lent and it works well for me :)

Matt-Man said...

Dianne: I'm not even any longer Catholic and haven't been in 25 years, but I do like the challenge of giving something up. Cheers Sexy!!