On this shortest day of the year, and due to the fact that I work early this afternoon, I offer you a brief song.
It is a 2 minute and 3 second piece of musical Christmas joy that I wrote and recorded some two years ago.
Ladies and Gentlemen…
Grandpa Got His Herpes From a Reindeer
Grandpa got his herpes from a reindeer
Coming home last year on Christmas Day
Please don’t be too hard on poor old Grandpa
The reindeer got him drunk, and had her way
I guess there was at least one witness
Who saw the carnage, and the grief
Said, there were hooves and arms a’flyin’
And Grandpa, eating venison without his teeth
He said it soon became a three way
As the deer she got on top
She was a grindin’ on Grandpa’s Yule log
While her tongue was makin’ love to a big salt block
Grandpa got his herpes from a reindeer
Coming home last year on Christmas Day
Please don’t be too hard on poor old Grandpa
The reindeer got him drunk, and had her way
And now the worst part of the story
Grandma’s drowning in her tears
‘Cause this year at our holiday table
Sits a yearling with doe-y eyes and Grandpa’s ears
Grandpa got his herpes from a reindeer
Coming home last year on Christmas Day
Please don’t be too hard on poor old Grandpa
The reindeer got him drunk, and had her way
I hope you all have a lovely Monday. I have one more Bagwine Christmas Classic left and by golly I may re-record just for all y’all and put it up by Wednesday.
Until then…
Cheers!!
20 comments:
The only Christmas music I listen to is Dean Martin and Matt-Man's parodies.
That's pretty damn funny stuff right there. ;-)
Jay: Obvioulsy, you are a man of impeccable taste. Cheers Jay-Man!!
You are one creative "summa bitch".
Grandpa was lucky that his horny deer didn't have a strap-on - or bring her studmuffin for that 3-way. Since he was drunk he might have gotten violated.
Good stuff Matt-Man!
You really should put it all together in a CD.
David: Why thanks. Maybe I should contact the network execs at Animal Planet and see if they want to make a movie based on the song. Cheers David!!
Micky: I know, I know, and thanks. I need a band, man, I need a band. Cheers Mick!!
Bahahahahah! JR will have to see this.
Michele: Hee Hee. Let me know what he thinks. Cheers Michele!!
...I've been concidering getting a salt lick for the house...
Phfrankie: The deer and other quadri-peds of that ilk will be so thankful. You are such a kind soul.
Wait a minute... You're not hoping to get animal porn out of this, are you?
Cheers P-Man!!
f'ing fantastic you brilliant bastard
love the yearling part!!
Ahhh yes an oldie but goodie! I had forgotten this one Matt-Man thanks for jarring my memory!
Dianne: Mmmmmmm. You know just what to say to make me weak in the kness. Love the yearling line. Cheers Sexy!!
Doc: It's my fave X-Mas song that I did, but Wednesday's post will have what seems to be the most popular X-Mas song that I did. Thanks Doc, and Cheers!!
always funny
Bod: Grandpa didn't think so...Well, for as much as he remembered. Cheers!!
See...your desire for me is showing...you called me Bod...you dream of me , don't cha?
Bond: Since it's Christmas, I'll let your comment stand on its own. Cheers!!
...Bond and Matt-Man sittin' in a tree...
That brought a tear to my eye.
Phfrankie: You are so adorable...or something. Cheers P-Man!!
Jeff: It is a bittersweet tune isn't it? Cheers and Here, Have a Hankie!!
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