Friday, October 08, 2010

I Love Snugs!!

I had no interesting conversations this week, well...other than the one I posted yesterday between Schmoop and I.

It was classic and elicited quite a few interesting comments and exchanges, but none more interesting than this exchange between the uber-crazy Snugs and myself:

snugs said...

oh wow, I didn't know you had your own drama going on over here today too..

can I just say that I am really digging Micky..

btw, I used to feel sorry for Schmoop, but now I realize I was wrong, I think that maybe she is just pissed she missed out on the action, either that or she is just ok settling for sloppy seconds..whatever floats their boat,

just because I can't imagine being with someone that practically fucks another woman on the couch while I am sleeping one off and then continues to boast and joke about it doesn't mean it's not her cup of tea, or rather vodka, Cheers!

My response:

Matt-Man said...

Snugs: Drama? I didn't realize that animated, sometimes heated exchanges between quasi-adults was considered, "drama".

I'm sure Schmoop is crushed that you no longer feel sorry for her as she spoke of your empathy for her with such treasure over the past couple of weeks. So sad.

Actually however, since I have been having sex with Schmoop for nearly ten years, doesn't that mean that Dana got the sloppy seconds? Just thinkin'.

And before you say somethin' 'bout that...No, I don't mind being referred to as sloppy seconds. It's kinda hot!!

Lessee...What else, we got c'here? Um...

I don't think Schmoop really was pissed about not having a three way, but I will tell you, she was impressed with Dana's tits. And who wouldn't be, because, they're real, and they're spectacular. Just like Schmoop's, only even BIGGER!!

As for you "knowing" that Dana and I "practically fucked" on the couch, leads me to think a couple of things...

Either you fantasize about what we did, or you as always, are once again living vicariously through Dana.

Either way, you should stop, 'cause it's creepin' me the fuck out!! But...entertaining as always.

Lastly, you did get one thing correct. While Schmoop can toss back more than her fair share of beer, she does like Vodka. But then again, who doesn't?

Have a wunnerful weekend, Snugs. I'll be spending mine working, laughing, hangin' out with my kid, and getting Schmoop from behind while we drink Vodka, talk about Dana's tits, and thoroughly enjoy life.

And...I'm making Manwich. Or, should I call it, Sloppy Seconds Joes!! Ha!! Yum.

Cheers, Freak Show!! (end)

Oh I love it when other people write my posts for me!!

By the way, I was whoring around this morning as well.

After I took Ryno to school, and on the way to the Vet's office to get Corky her food, I passed the house of an old girlfriend.

When I got home, I emailed her and said:

I drove by your house a few minutes ago and I played with "it" as I passed.

She responded:

How odd...At about 0800 I had my vibrator out and was going, "Oooooweeeeeoohhhhh". Hope things are good.

Ha...I so dig open, upfront, smart, funny people.

Have a weekend, and as always...

Cheers!!

39 comments:

Micky-T said...

Snug digs me? That is fricken bizarre! ...and a little scary.

I might just have to blow this blog thing right out of the water, sail into the sunset and don't look back till I get all the way around.

You'll all still be here.

Matt-Man said...

Micky: The Micky-T Fan Club has been founded. You are a lucky man to have Snugs as your Prez, Mick.

May you have favorable winds on your journey, and Cheers Mick!!

Jay said...

Good old Snugs. You can always count on her to remind you of all your flaws and be all morally superior and shit.

Don't worry Mic, I'm sure it wouldn't take much for you make Snugs hate you. As soon as she decides you too aren't perfect enough for her, she'll turn on ya. ;-)

Beth said...

Wait a minute, so you're saying she doesn't feel sorry for me anymore because I'm not perfect??? Is that what she's implying??? Damn...I may need therapy. Sum bitch.

snugs said...

Ya see, just when I think you are boring and dull, you go and make me laugh again. Glad to have provided you something to blog about, let me know if you need my autograph too but of course there would be a charge for that!

Matt-Man said...

Jay: She's like God. Only with much less of a sense of humor...or humanity. Cheers Jay!!

Schmoop: See? You fucked up!! You need to right your ship and do it quickly, missy. Cheers and Zoooooves Schmoop!!

Matt-Man said...

Snugs: I'd love to have your autograph, but how could I be certain that the "X" on the paper is truly yours? Cheers!!

Micky-T said...

So much entertainment within this bloggerhood, it'll be really hard to leave for any length of time.

Matt-Man said...

Micky: And just think...There are writers in Hollywood getting to paid to make this same shit up!! It's a Scandal!! Cheers Mick!!

Charlene said...

I figure God invented sex so we could enjoy it. The more the better; any day, any way, with any one?

Matt-Man said...

Charlene: Hell, God not only invented sex, he perfected it. He got a chick pregnant and never had to touch her, buy her dinner, or live with her. Cheers Charlene!!

Dana said...

Personally? I don't think snugs either fantasizes about what we did, or lives vicariously through me, I'm fairly certain she fantasizes about what we did, and lives vicariously through me.

I just wish she'd get a blog of her own so that I'd get some referral traffic. After all, I should get something out of being used for snugs' personal pleasure!

Matt-Man said...

Dana: Now c'mon...As you and everyone else knows, I'm not into personal attacks on this site, and that was just awful. You should be reprimanded.

However...

(In my best Phil Hartman voice as he impersonates Ed McMahon)

Rrrrrrrright you are, sir!!

Cheers Dana!!

snugs said...

I am so sorry to disappoint Dana, but I can assure you none of my fantasies include her or even Matt, and my life is pretty full all on it's own so I really don't have a need to live through you guys. I just enjoy reading what comes next with her many crises. I will agree that I use her but not like you think. I use her for motivation to never fall back in to playing the victim role ever again. But doggy, him I do fantasize about, ya see I have this thing for hispanic men, I guess you could say that I like what brown does for me. However unlike Dana, I would never act on it cuz I learned the hard way not to mess with another woman's man and I try not to make the same mistakes twice. As far as getting my own blog, I have no desire for doing that so you are just stuck with getting nothing out of this relationship.

Doc said...

Hey Snugs !!

Jay said...

I'm totally not leaving this comment so that I can check the "email follow-up comments" box.

I'll just be over here popping popcorn now that I'm back from the beer store.

Oh, and don't let Snugs fool ya. You guys fulfill all of her nasty fantasies and her life would be totally empty without you and Dana.

Doc said...

Hey Snugs... I do want to know where to find your blog/twitter so we can hear more about your life...

Doc said...

Jay - Put extra butter on mine.

Dana said...

Really snugs? Can't you at least give me a reach around?? There's *got* to be something I get from you as I am clearly giving you so much.

That's kinda selfish, don't you think??

Mike said...

You gotta' admit this crap does run the comment count way up.

Matt-Man said...

Snugs: I think you have a thing not only for Hispanic men, but in the case of Doggy, weird mother fuckers.

Have you ever read a comment left by him when he is drunk on wine in the middle of the night..? The dude is bat shit crazy!!

Matt-Man said...

Jay: Yeah, well...the bottom line is...er...well, she sucks. Cheers Jay!!

Doc: There isn't one. She's a drive-by sniper. Cheers Doc!!

Matt-Man said...

Dana: I'll reach around and grab your ass right in front of Schmoop...Maybe Snugs' head will assplode. Cheers Dana!

Mike: Yes it does, but that's not what I am after. Cheers Funny Man!!

Micky-T said...

I don't know you guys.....you might be getting a little snobby!

We're all entitled to speak our minds here, especially if you post some stuff that calls for controversy and your comment box is open. That's how it all works here, some have the balls to say it as they see it, and many more just carry on with the fun of commenting without really confronting the author of the post.
Just trying to be real.

snugs said...

Geez, now even Jay knows what makes me tick, it's amazing how all of you bloggers are just so damn smart! I could never have my own blog cuz I'm just out of my league among all of y'all. Sorry Doc, no blog and I don't twitter or twatter so you are just SOL, and Dana let me just be your worst headache or that little dick weed that you never know when I'm gonna pop back up. You've called me lots of names so now we can just add selfish to your list. And I love how Jay thinks my fantasies are all nasty. Wasn't it here that I heard someone state (so you know it must be law) that we more easily recognize faults in others that we fail to see in ourselves? Your rule not mine.So let's see, that would make Jay's life completely empty w/o you 2 plus he's nasty and morally superior, Dana is selfish among so many other things, Matt a weird mother fucker that drunk blogs. I just learn so much from you guys, Thanks!

Matt-Man said...

Micky: Snobby? Ha. We're eating Sloppy Seconds Joes tonight. AND...

Of course anyone is allowed to speak their mind on here...

When I have I EVER sileneced anyone on here?

Waiting...waiting..waiting...

If you wanna talk balls and speaking on what's on one's mind, I think I have a boat load, I think have a ship full of truth, and the port of call into which it is sailing, is named, Port-Au-Truth. Cheers Mick!!

Micky-T said...

Never! You let it all hang out and that's why we all love you.

BUT!!!! Wait a minute.....you sound really pissed at me.....are you?

Jay said...

I am morally superior. Just ask all the drunks, gamblers and strippers that I hang out with.

Actually Snugs, you could have saved yourself time and effort by simply saying "Nu-Uh! YOU ARE!!"

And if your fantasies aren't nasty, then they aren't any good.

Micky-T said...

I believe everybody involved in this clusterfuck of comments in this particular bloogerhood is a "NICE" person. I have no other reason to believe otherwise.
But!!!! Some subjects are flaunted here (in the hood) that provoke people to really speak their mind. And that should NOT be held against them.
Damn!!!! Wish I could type better.

Matt-Man said...

Snugs: Words escape me right now, which in itself, is pretty fucking amazing. Along the lines of Tennyson, Tolstoi, and Yeats being denied their gift of gab.

When I read your comments, I am dumbstruck by and overwhelmed by the quesion, "Is this chick really this stupid, arrogant, and full of herself?"

I always answer..."Yes."

First of all, Jay's life is full because unlike you, he has friends. Dana's life, while imperfect, is honest...and Doc's life, for whatever reason you chose to drag him in, is quite comfortable.

Seriously? Doc?

My life with Schmoop? It's not bad at all. In fact before I typed this, we made fun of you. And laughed, and laughed, and laughed...and then we had sex.

And let me tell ya, crazy girl...it was Fantastic!!

Good luck breaking the silence of the lambs...!!

Matt-Man said...

Micky: Hell No...I am not mad at you and haven't been through this entire thing. I enjoy people saying what they mean, and feel. I will jump on them if I don't agree of course, but that's cool. Cheers Mick!!

Matt-Man said...

Jay: See? Jay has it down, people. When confronted (albeit by a chick who is mindless and lonely)opt for the Pee-Wee Herman line of attack. Jay!? I love you man. Cheers!!

Micky-T said...

G'night.....see later in the week!

Another Suburban Mom said...

I'm just bummed that you almost got to have sex with Dana and I didn't.


But at least I get to live vicariously through your blog.

Knight said...

I don't believe Snugs exists. I think one of you crazies created her for entertainment. Well done.

Clay Perry said...

its like jerry springer over here... snugs seems like she needs a good fucking.

Matt-Man said...

Micky: Best of travels to ya. Cheers Mick!!

ASM: Ha...So do I. Cheers ASM!!

Knight: I would never create something that evil, and well, stupid. I have standards. Cheers Knight!!

Matt-Man said...

Clay: Ha!! That's what I think too, or as Schmoop's brother would say, "She needs the High Hard One." Cheers Clay!!

Raquel's World said...

OMG I always miss everything,,,, Damned kid with his throw up virus.
I love you Matt but I have to be honest here, I really dig Snugs. I really do. I enjoy her back and forth with you guys, especially Dana. I think she's rather savvy and I so wish she would get a blog.