Monday, November 29, 2010

Let's Get Casual...Casual

Some places employ the “Casual Friday” atmosphere in the work week, today?

I was thinking I would offer up, “Casual Monday” with some off the cuff thoughts, ponderings, and bon mots…or something.

I was thinking that today I would begin the campaign of trying to get Wild Irish Rose to be a corporate sponsor of Bagwine Ruminations and/or I’m With Stupid.

‘Cause…Ima gonna be needin’ to find a new source of income, and quickly.

Times are slow at the Beer Mine and I am definitely going to be getting my hours cut in a couple of days if not worse.

There’s no way ‘round it. The tough economic times have finally caught up with the drinkers of spirits and inhalers of tar and nicotine.

It’s sad…but understandable. Time to adapt and overcome, but I wish Christmas wasn’t so close. Oh well, it is, what it is.

Speaking of the Beer Mine, I have noticed something while working there…Nurses are crappy tippers and waitresses are excellent tippers. Go figure!?

The Holiday season kicks off this week. Hanukkah begins Wednesday at sundown, but prior to that, Tuesday is Dour Mike’s Birthday.


I can only imagine the wackiness that will ensue at the Dour Mike digs!!

I think both of those celebrations will be mentioned on this Friday’s edition of, I’m With Stupid. In fact…I’m sure of it.

I went to see Ryno Sunday night after work and dig it…His mom sent me home with nearly an entire Pizza Hut pie...Free!! Yum.

She’s off today and didn’t want to be tempted by its presence, so home with me it came. Dee Lish!! ON the down side…

I have been suffering from diarrhea for three days and the pizza didn’t help. I don’t know what the problems is, but…

Sunday while at work, I let loose five rounds of shit that more resembled pools of dirty, yellowish-brown water.

Kinda looked like a moist mix of Brown mustard, A-1 Sauce, with only a few chick peas sprinkled in.

It was like I was peeing out muh ass.

The only good thing about the Beer Mine being dead was that I got all of them taken care of uninterrupted.

I just hope Drive-By Mikey doesn’t charge me for the five rolls of toilet paper I used. Oy, I am still afflicted by it.

Well folks, I must start researching a variety of things, so I shall end this now.

I am working the Mine 2-9 today, at least I hope I still I am, so I shall catch y'all soon after that.

Have a wonderful Casual Monday, and as always…

Cheers!!

17 comments:

Average Chick said...

Popcorn Matty. That'll stop you up good. Tried and true butt pee remedy in my family.

Sorry to hear about the mine. I wish I was closer to donate to the economic stimulus of it. It would be awesome to have a drive through beverage/nicotine store!

Schmoop said...

Average Chick: Yeah popcorn probably would be a good idea. Thanks. And yeah, driving right through the Beer Mine is right cool. Cheers AC!!

Jay said...

Well that really sucks that things are so slow at the Beer Mine. Shit like this always happens around Christmas time. That's what makes it even shittier.

Mike said...

Generic immodium. Stops it every time. Stops it for an extended period of time too.

Hopefully I can get that picture out of my mind by Tuesday.

Scott Oglesby said...

You could always go on the road with me, working the long con and cracking wise. I like this idea, it’s got legs. Legs like a long legged dame.

I’m hoping that our long con doesn’t involve talking like pulp detectives because I’m pretty sure I suck at it.

Evil Twin's Wife said...

Sorry about the slowness at work and the quickness of your colon. Hope things get better soon!

Schmoop said...

Scott: That sounds good, and I wrote a post lonnnng ago writing in that style. I'll have to find it. Cheers Scott!!

Evil: Things all balance out in the end...at some point. Thhanks and Cheers ETW!!

MysteryChick said...

Sorry to hear the economic downturn may hit you too. I will be sending positive thoughts your way that things pick up. I thought surely all us unemployed people who resorted to drinking would help but I guess we're running out of dough.

Raquel's World said...

Well first let me thank you for the lovely description of your shit. That was real grand so early in the morning.

I too think Wild Irish should pay you. You should do an online petetion and send it to them. I definitely think Matt-Man now when I see some Wild Irish.

Sorry about the beer mine...sucks.

Schmoop said...

Chick: Thanks Hot Stuff. While beer and smokes are somewhat recession proof, it was bound to catch up with us at some point. You, I, and all shall overcome though. Cheers Chick!!

Raquel: Ha...I callz em as I seez em. And dig it...I was thinking of utilizing some type of petiton/email campaign to get them in my corner. we think alike. Is that scary? Cheers Sexy!!

Ken said...

That's to bad the cash vein is thinning out at the mine. Hope it's just a little thinning for you.

Begging is still somewhat acceptable and can be a prosperous way to make a living in many parts of the world, you just have to stuff your pride deep up your asshole, which could help you in your present condition. hee hee

Schmoop said...

Micky: I ain't too proud to beg, but it is too cold to beg. So my ass is gonna have to clear up on its own. Cheers Mick!!

Beth said...

Sorry you don't feel all that good baby. Don't worry things will be just fine :)

Schmoop said...

Schmoop: I knows. Cheers and Zooooves Baby!!

Knight said...

Brown Mustard and A1? That's some special sauce. Maybe you should bottle it and sell it in lieu of your beer mine pay that was cut. Give it out as Christmas gifts. Look at it as a Holiday blessing!

Deech said...

Matt,

Here is hoping that you go un-touched, economically that is...Best of luck to you at the Beer Mine.

Schmoop said...

KNight: I was thinking that if I could bottle whatever bug I have as a weight loss elixir, I'd be rich. Cheers Knight!!

Joker: Why thank ya sir. All will be well in time. Cheers Joker!!