I am so sick of the United States. Tired of living here. Fed up beyond belief.
None. They all suck.
There a few bugs to work out and things to think through, but I am already working on these things.
First of all…
The secession and this new nation involves only this apartment, so when I send my letter of secession to the U.S. State Department, they will likely consider it to be the mere ramblings of a mad man and probably won’t dispatch the military to quash my rebellion.
Secondly, I need to establish a Head of State, so…
I am appointing myself, Philosopher King of Bagwine. I haven’t cleared this with the other resident of this natal nation, but I’m sure Schmoop will express her agreement when I tell her, by saying to me:
That pending, yet certain response may seem to be indifference, but what it really is, is a mandate.
And in all fairness, and since Schmoop is the only other human resident of the Benevolent Bungalow of Bagwine, in my infinite wisdom, I will appoint her to several cabinet positions.
This is all I am at liberty to publicly disclose for now, but no worries.
Let Freedom Ring, Bitches, and as always…