Friday, July 22, 2011

Time Warner Cable: Matt E. Coyote Chokes the Roadrunner

Hey!!

Hot enough for ya? Sorry Matt-Man, couldn’t resist.

I don’t know what the temperatures are where you live, but it’s hotter than Kelsey’s nuts in Bagwine. That is fucking hot, people!!
 

It’s pretty bad when going out for a five minute smoke at work causes me to sweat. I am not one to sweat usually; I’m mainly cold. This week though…

I’ve been going from air conditioner to air conditioner.

Anyhoo…

Thanks for joining me here on Bagwine Ruminations today. Just wanted to mention the suffocating heat where I am, because as we all know, it’s all about me.

Ha. I’m kidding. I kid because I love, and…this post is brought to you by random musings.

My cat, for now…for some odd reason gets on the top of the fridge and the very top kitchen cabinet. She hasn’t done this in years.

We figured it was her age, and um, shhhhh in case she is reading this…her girth that was keeping her from her fave perch. 

So now, when she is perched there, every time I leave the kitchen, she bitch slaps me on the back of the head. Bitch.

Lessee…

I made a most splendid macaroni and cheese the other night. It was NOT a box thing, I made it myself. Matt said it was awesome, but I think he just wants to get laid. He also says I’m pretty. 

Hmmm…I’m sensing a trend here.

I really need to start writing about important shit. You know…politics, the media, the financial crisis…

Who the Hell am I kidding? I am the drivel queen!!

Sorry this all over the place, but I am typing this at work and I need to keep stopping to find things. I don’t even know what I have written. I won’t know until this posts on Friday. I have an editor, y’know.

Oh shit, listen up!! Define irony…

Matt-Man stages a one man campaign against Time Warner, and what did I do yesterday? I paid the cable bill, however…

Less than 48 hours after he threatened to publicly humiliate them on Bagwine, I’m With Stupid, the I’m With Stupid radio show, and hold a rally outside their office in Bagwine, Ohio…

Those bastards caved, and we will be getting our non-dropping internet cable upgrade on the 27th, or as I pray, we better be, ’cause Matt-Man will get uber-ugly wif em if it doesn‘t happen, and I saw him when he worked for SEIU, his ugliness is not a good thing.

Who loves themselves?

Zoooooves!!

18 comments:

Jay said...

Just wait until August. That's when it gets REALLY hot!

No complimenting TWC until they actually do the upgrade.

sybil law said...

I love myself.

What did you do to piss off that poor cat? So funny!

Mike said...

'...the ...... heat where I am..'

That's just you thinking about the Matt-Man. He does make you hot doesn't he?

Beth said...

Jay: Knowing Ohio, it will be fall by August.

Sybil: I do nothing to make her mad, she just feels it's her right.

Mike: Why yes indeed he does, but it's really, really hot outside;)

Joker_SATX said...

Time Warner Cable...ATT Uverse and the major of other high Speed Internet companies that own their own carved out portions of America suck major monkey balls...

That is all....

Beth said...

Joker: You are correct sir.

IWS Radio said...

I'm just here to help. Thanking me with a sexcapade is always the furthest thing from my mind. How's the ferret? Cheers!!

Matt-Man

Beth said...

Matt: Ha! Liar! You know how the ferret is goof;)

Phfrankie Bondo said...

I love my self, but my self is ambivalent towards me.

Beth said...

Phfrankie: Ha! You never fail to make me laugh!

ISRAEL CARRASCO said...

I've been burning up in CA also. It is hell, almost literally.

Beth said...

Israel: Isn't it though? You can hardly breathe here. Drink more;)

Four Dinners said...

Spent many a year with AOHell myself...went to leave them but found I was addicted to having shouting and swearing matches with complete morons in call centres in New Delhi or Islamabad or wherever the hell they where....

I always won merely by saying at some point..."Can you put me through to someone who actually speaks English?"...they often hung up at that point...

Anyroad AOHell finally stopped chasing me for monies owed as I threatened to expose their incompetence when it went to court!!!

Anonymous said...

I feel your pain, lady!
I can't even look outside without sweating.
Here in West TN, we may have Autumn around December. Funny: one Christmas the girls will be playing outside on a sunny, warm day in short sleeves, one Christmas they will be bundled up playing in snow. Stupid weather!
Not funny: having to go all bitch on a company that gladly takes your money, but God forbid you should ask for anything.
Had trouble with our insurance company few months ago. I knew I was right, so did they. I told them they could either deal with me, or deal with my husband, told them they DID NOT want to deal with my husband.
It wasn't a threat, just a statement of fact.
Anyhows, they ended up dealing with the husband and realized Hey! She was right! We really didn't want to deal with him!
When I worked in customer service, it made me happy to be able to solve a problem. I can't explain why it isn't the case with others.
Ame in TN

Rich said...

Npw if you two can get the a\c fixed, you'll be golden. :-)

Schmoop said...

Four: OMFG! You crack me up! I did AT&T for awhile, but the charges kept adding up. I'd call to ask what some of them were, and I'd get "well it just is, so pay it". Bloody fuckers.

Schmoop said...

Ame: Oh God I know. Personally, I'm ashamed to say...I wouldn't have done a damn thing about it. Thank goodness Matt will have none of that shit.

Rich: Shut your pie hole mister, and knock on wood! It's running fine right now. If it goes down in this heat, I'm coming after you.

Rich said...

If it goes down I'll let you catch me. ;-)