I like very early morning rises. No noise from the traffic outside. Schmoop is in the bedroom snoring softly. And…
As soon as I sit down to my computer, my cat, Corky comes out from wherever she was sleeping, hops upon the arm of Kelly, and lays there while I type.
It never fails. If I type a post at night or in the morning, my faithful feline companion is at my side.
And so it is this morning…Anyhoo…
I woke up early today for two reasons. Number one…
I had to pee…alot. It was an Austin Powers, newly unfrozen type of de-urine-piss-a-fication. I bet I woke the neighbors.
The second reason I awoke was because as I was battling between consciousness and slumber, I had a great idea related to the breakfast cereal industry.
I came up with a type of cereal that will open up a new market in the industry.
Cereal today is marketed to kids who enjoy prizes and sugary goodness. It’s marketed to old folks who feel the need to have powerful bowel movements.
And, to women of all ages who are actually concerned about what goes into their bodies.
As I was awoke, I figured, hey, who is selling cereal to men 18-55? No one.
Men 18-55, for the most part, have moved beyond the sugar and prizes. They couldn’t care less if they shit or not, and unlike women, they don’t give a damn what goes into their bodies.
So, I think that the vast, male 18-55 market is all mine. So what kind of cereal will I develop?
This cereal right here my friends…
That’s right, bitches. Vagina Charms. Each piece will look like a tiny hoo-ha. And best of all, they will be dripping with milk.
What kind of guy wouldn’t like to wake up to a bowl full of wet va-jay-jay? Okay, gay guys, but other than that, I mean, c’mon.
Yes guys, this cereal is not just simply delicious…It’s Labia-Licious!!
And guys, when you buy it and your buddy asks if you can share, you tell him, “No way dude, eat your own box.”
Also, if your wife or girlfriend gives you any crap about buying it, just remind her that eatin' ain't cheatin'.
Oh yeah, I think I’m on to something. Yum-Oh!!
Enjoy your Friday and your weekend all. And don’t forget…
Vagina…It’s What’s for Breakfast!!
Cheers!!
