Showing posts with label Freaks. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Freaks. Show all posts

Saturday, August 01, 2009

Bacon and Cracked Eggs

Ahhhhhhh it’s the first Saturday of August. I like August because that means that the College Football season starts at the end of this month.

However, that is still a few days away from now, but this Saturday is kicking off with me taking my nearly 15 year old (Oh Dear God) son and eating machine, Ryno, out for breakfast.

As of the writing of this, I am not sure where we will go. One thing is certain however...


No matter where we end up eating, we will be involved in a freak show.

Seriously, every time Ryno and I go out to eat, we either are eating our breakfast to the sound of a close by middle-aged patron who looks like Charles Manson screaming about his manly prowess on the slow pitch softball field or…

We are handed our lunch by a waitress who appears to have just been released from the Ohio Reformatory for Women after serving time for sawing her husband in half and eating his brain.

It never fails.

One lunch involved the aforementioned softball guru. Another involved the ex-con chick.


We went to Appleby’s recently and were waited on by some dude who kept giving me the eye. Yeah…the sexual eye.

Ryno was quite amused by that. Some of you who have read me for awhile may remember one of the Christmas presents that I gave to Ryno this past year…





Why is Ryno laughing? It’s a picture of me replicating the look on the face of a guy who was sitting across from us when I took Ryno out for lunch last October.

That disturbing gaze never left the dude’s face as he chowed down on a lunch of onion rings and a fish sandwich.

Ryno and I were so disturbed, fixated, and amused. We couldn’t take our eyes off of this guy. It got better.

Ryno and I went to the bathroom after we were done eating, and what did we see?


We saw the same guy taking a leak in the bathroom still sporting the same maniacal look on his face as he gazed down upon his golden stream of craziness.

Ha. It is a face that we both replicate to this day, and Ryno will even use it when he is guarding an opponent while playing basketball.


It truly unnerves the man he is defending. As it should…

So, I am looking forward to a little freakiness to go along with my bacon (Mmmmmmmmm, Bacon) this morning.

And the best thing about my outing with Ryno? It reads like a MasterCard commercial…

Breakfast: 25 Bucks

Nearby Asylum Escapees: Annoying

The Laughs You Will Share Forever With Your Kid Over This Simple Meal: Priceless.


Have a wonderful Saturday all. I’ll have my camera with me just in case our string of encountering restaurant freaks continues.

Cheers!!


Post Breakfast Report

The Boy Ate...It...All


Three Pancakes...A Sausage Patty...Two Sausage Links...Two Scrambled Eggs...Two Strips of Bacon...Two Kielbasa Links....and, get this...Two Diet Cokes. WTF?