The Almighty spoke to me in a dream last night. The prophecies that I had predicted near the start of Lent are beginning to come to fruition. God told me that I am to be the rock upon which he will build his new church, a church that will stand until the world is less insane and it is safe for him and Christ to return.While I am indeed not Christ, God told me that I was the most “Christ-Like” person on Earth. He even praised me for my fine lyrics of worship and adoration. He went on to say that I even resemble his son physically, although I am not nearly as well-hung. (Sorry Allie)
I have a 10:00 a.m. meeting with Abraham and am meeting the head of John the Baptist for a light lunch after that. I will be back later today to discuss with you some the guidelines, ceremonies, and philosophy of God’s new church…The Mattlic Church. Until then my flock, Cheers!!
19 comments:
Are gays accepted?
(My only concern apparently! ha)
Gays yes, Pastor Rod Parsley no, although he would be nice to have around for comedic value and to serve as an example of what an ashole is. Cheers Deb!!
Something makes me very afraid to ask what the sacraments will be..oh my!
I smell a classic coming on TB!!
I hope some of Gandi's "practices" are incorporated..! ;-)
Peace
Maybe everyone will have to shave their head odat!!
Will there be any church-rate, Pope Matt-Man I.?
However I´m off to get my haed shaved right now!
Cheers,
signed
Sanni (The Hairless Not-So-Nun)
Sanni, as one of my first offcial acts I will offer you the position of Papal Caretaker and assign you the title of Ste. Sanni of the Bratwurst.
Yours in Christ,
Pope Matt-Man I
I think people that represent the church can be the most satan-like people of all. But that's just me :)
-N
A new day is dawning Nat and I am the light and the way....or something like that. Cheers!!!
Ste. Sanni of the Bratwurst - holy shit *AHEM* I mean... holy Christ!
I´m honored to be cononized although I´m not (as) dead (as I should be) *LOL*
I´ll kneel down immediately, Pope Matt-Man I.!
B.t.w.: Does my position as Papal Caretaker include kissing... any... feet?!
Sorry, darling man, but I don't do organized religion...only chaos and unruliness for me...
Bwahahahahaha!
Well, will we get to drink your blood, too, Matt-Man? The blood of the new covenant, a.k.a. WIR.
Ste. Sanni: Feet kissing? Sure, I'd be glad to kiss your feet. That's the kinda of giving person I am.
Songbird: Spoken like a true Catholic. Cheers!!
Lizza: Only through copious amounts of WIR can one truly see the face of God. ; )
Just what is it that one has to lick in this Mattlic Church? Mind you now, chocolate sauce can cover up a lot, but I do have a line I won't cross.
I
WILL
NOT
SHAVE
MY
HEAD
Anything else... ok....
Oh Travis? There will be CAKE. Lots and lots of CAKE. You can lick the icing, 'kay?
Travis: Feel free to lick or not lick...believe or not believe.
Cheesy: Your locks are free to stay, but they must be blessed.
Songbird: I will let them eat cake.
Oh my fav!! Anoint away!
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