Thursday, February 25, 2010

Take A Picture...It Lasts Longer

Hiya Kidz...

Schmoop and I are a bit under the weather today, so I thought perhaps I'd do a pictorial post. Or is that pictoral? Hell, I don't know...Anyhoo...

Here's a picture of me yesterday after I shaved my head...Tres Chic, no?

Last night I made Filet Mignon. Okay it's hamburger that I mixed with onion, parsley, garlic, What's This Here Sauce, held together by crumpled Sour Cream and Onion potato chips (can't eat bread ya know), and wrapped in bacon, but...

It looks good, no?

Here's a picture of it almost done. I had to put it back in the oven for 10 minutes so the bacon could finish cooking...

Schmoop dug it, and since she is home today, we are opening up the interwebz (Thanks Doc) for any questions you may have of her.

Feel free...she's open to answering any questions you may have about her and her sordid life.


I want to apologize to Gary Garedenhire who I so acerbically trashed the other day. Maybe he was coming on to me and I just didn't pick up on it...

As a petition of atonement and in order to maybe having sex with Gary, Larry Craig, and Ted Haggard in the future, I offer this song.

It's a song by a guy who was ridiculed and persecuted by the evil octopus that is the music recording industry.

Ladies and gentlemen, and especially you Gary, I give you my sincerest regrets and the musical magic that is David Soul...


Cheers!!

29 comments:

Dianne said...

David Soul was so dreamy
and such a better singer than Hasselhoff

I want to know if Schmoop will run anway with me to Vegas where we will both become undercover strippers and expose the mob

Beth said...

Dianne: I have but one word for you...YES!! Call Me!!

Phfrankie Bondo said...

Dear Schmoop:

Are you vomiting RIGHT NOW, as I am, after having watched approximately four seconds of that video?

Signed,

? and the Mysterians

Beth said...

Hee Hee...No, I'm not vomitting but I am crying 96 tears. Actually, I like that song. Is that wrong?

Ken said...

That song hurt, it really did.

WHY, Schmoop do you claim to like that song?

Almost forgot...good looking meat bags in that pan!!! Yum!

Beth said...

Mick: Ha! When Matt first played it last night, he was absolutely appalled that I knew the words!! I probably had it on 45 somewhere. Meat...Good.

Doc said...

Feel better and yes that Filet mignon did look great... Just needs some A1 (or AL as Mrs.D's blog would have you believe)
Thanks for the interwebz love...

Doc said...

Oh and the head shaving looks magnifique!

Beth said...

Doc: Matt refuses to sign me out so I shall say what he told me to type:

"I Love You, Doc, and Mrs. D can call it whatever she wants to, 'cause she's hot and has nice teeth."

bobbybegood1 said...

Hi Schmoop,

I liked the song when it first came out, but I can't stand it now. Wasn't that his only hit?

Anydiddles, you rock in that pic wearing those sunglasses. You are wwwwwwwwwaaaaaaaayyyyyyy prettier than Matt. As a matter of fact, I would prefer to blog with you than Matt, but don't tell him. Hahaha. Cheers Schmoop!!

Beth said...

Bobby: For some odd reason, I still like that song. I suppose it's because I still love 70's music. A hit? Nah, I just think Starsky and Hutch wasn't enough for him, kinda like John Travolta's album (which I had). Thanks for the pretty comment, and I won't tell Matt. I may have a blog coming soon.

bobbybegood1 said...

Excellent! I can't wait for your blog. I know it's going to be the BOMB!!

Beth said...

Bobby: Well, I had one before, but I let it go, could not keep up! I'll try again soon.

David said...

What's with that guy in the vid - does he take 100 showers a day? He can just forget that - he can't wash the gay away. If he is a musician, I suspect the skin flute is his instrument.

Speaking washing the gay away, I learned from an alert friend that there were mucho many posts on Craigslist here from attendees at the CPAC looking for conservative men to have hot Repulican man-on-man sex. Aren't they supposed to be anti-gay? No reports yet on any Larry Craig action at the Marriott conference center.

Schmoop - I can see why you enjoyed Matt-Man's elegant Faux Mignon.

Beth said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Beth said...

David: Do you not remember Starsky and Hutch? Come on Man!! Can't you be an on the spot reporter, and come up with some dirt on this CPAC (Conservative Pricks Against Cunniligus) thing?

David said...

@Schmoop - Oh, believe me I tried to get a chance for in-person reporting on the shenanigans at CPAC but being neither conservative nor a Republican (at least not since the Goldwater era) they could see me coming from a mile away and I couldn't get a foot in the door. There should be some inundo there about mine being a foot long but I'm just not feeling it this morning.

Beth said...

David: I'm not feeling it today either, although Matt-Man keeps begging me to.

Anonymous said...

Schmoop- How do you keep your skin in such good shape? I'm totally jealous. And I hope you do get a blog!

Beth said...

3, Can I call you 3? Oil of Olay Baby! Every freakin day!!! I had a blog once, but I think I'm going to start another one.

Scott Oglesby said...

I have only one question dear sexy lady; how did you come upon the nickname Schmoop? Which brings up another question…Jersey Shore season 2?

Jay said...

You can be wimpy and apologize to Gary all you want Matt-Man. I never will!

Schmooooooooooop! What terrible events in your life resulted in you settling for Matt?

Okay, that probably wasn't fair. I'm still a little bitter about the apology.

So, Schmoop baby, hypothetically if we were going to run away together, where would you want us to go?

Beth said...

Scott: The name Schmoop came from a Seinfeld episode. I don't know if you get that show in re-runs in the land of the goats, but it's the one with the Soup Nazi. Jersey Shore? Who me and Diane? Would be a cool show don't ya think?!!!

Beth said...

Jay: My Viking!!! Matt is a big fat liar!

Where would we go? Anywhere honey, except Ar-Kansas or Ohio!! Get me out of this snow covered shithole!!!! The skies are blue right now, but it's still snowing!!!

Lu' said...

Wrinkling your head like that I am reminded of Shar-Peis. Roll over and I'll rub your belly *wink*

Schmoop if you had to choose between a visit by the clean house show, a years supply of Cap'n Crunch or sex with Matt-Man which would it be?

Beth said...

Lu: Hmmm...sex with Matt-Man??? Ha! I'm right, aren't I? Well...the house is still dirty, I have stale Captain Crunch, and Frankenberry....and Matt has been "taken care of".

DILLIGAF said...

If I turned the pic upside down, with your shaved head and goatee you could give me a bl....

actually I think I'll just shut up...;-)

Dana said...

I think I might have to give that mock-fillet-minion a try??

Questions for Schmoop? I wouldn't know where to start ...

The Covert Lover said...

That song - GAG!!!
I'm late but do I still get to ask question?
"I probably had it on 45 somewhere"
Ummm 45?
Would that be some ancient music devise that they had even before 8 tracks?
You don't have to answer, I'm going to google to make sure that's what it is! lol

Oh and I hope you do start another blog Schmoop! :)