Monday, December 06, 2010

Let Them Know It's Christmas Time

Today I begin my first full week of being on the public dole. It’s sad, but as I said upon finding out last week, it’s much harder on the little ones.

Especially at Christmas time.

I spent some time with my son Ryno Sunday night. The poor fellow…he’s very unnerved by my untimely occupational misfortune.

After some time discussing the situation and sharing more than a few tears, Ryno went over to his sparsely decorated Christmas tree, kneeled down beside it, and while choking back his despair, and asked…


“Daddy? Will we still have Christmas? Will We?”

As my heart sank, my hands trembled, and my thoughts turned to the Little Baby Jesus, I said to Ryno…

“As God as my witness, you will have Christmas no matter what. In fact, my pal Jayman and I have already discussed how we are going to make it happen.”

Yes folks…This Thursday at 11 PM EST on I’m With Stupid on Blog Talk Radio, Jayman and I will be holding a Radio-Thon for Ryno!!

We’re going to make certain that this Christmas is the best one ever for a kid, who simply goes through life with love in his heart and hope for the future.

Wouldn’t you like to help us, help a precious child...like Ryno?

Of course you would, and we know you will, because we know that the spirit of Santa and the natal Nazarene dwells within your hearts…and your souls.

So ladies and gentlemen join Jay and myself Thursday at 11 PM EST (That’s right Thursday!!) on I’m With Stupid and help us spread the Christmas joy to a worried little boy.

We will have celebrities galore chiming in, a new Christmas song, and we will be taking your calls and your Christmas pledges for I’m With Stupid’s favorite son....

my son, Ryno.

Make sure to tune in Thursday and help us to shine the light of Christmas upon Ryno…


Even Justin Bieber is helping out…

(Click where it says: "twaud.io)

You can go to our I’m with Stupid Radio page by clicking HERE.

And if you do, check out our Hanukkah Special from last week. It was really good, until I decided to join Moses for a walk through the wilderness and never returned…

Have a wonderful Monday, and c’mon….share the spirit with a babe in need.

Cheers!!

19 comments:

Dana said...

I was all, "YES! Let's do it for Ryno" ... that is until I heard the Justin Bieber promo. Then I hurled ...

Schmoop said...

Dana: Aw c'mon...Justin is there for the children. Show some Christmas Spirit...even if he did ruin my FFL team. Cheers Dana!!

Knight said...

I'm still having a hard time with you calling Ryno a little boy. I mean, if I can legally have sex with him (I checked and it is 16 in Ohio) he just isn't a boy anymore. I would rather participate because you are all fucking awesome and deserve a great holiday.

Jay said...

*sniff, sniff*

We're doing this one for Ryno!!!

Jay said...

I simulposted with Knight. Oh man that was hot!!! I need a cigarette now.

Schmoop said...

KNight: He's but a mere waif in the body of a 16 year old, but whatever it takes. it's cool too. Cheers Knight!!

Jay: Damn right, and yeah, enjoy that virtual post-coital smoke. Cheers Jay!!

Mike said...

But.... What about Ryno's mom? She sounded fraught about you job loss too.

Mike said...

...your...

Scott Oglesby said...

God bless you all.

Here’s what you do though. Watch one of those Salvation Army ringer people outside of Wal-Mart for a few days. Find out what time the truck comes by to switch out the money bowl thingy. The driver should be really old and/or a Christian so you just have to basically carjack his ass and take the van somewhere to empty. It’s not the best lick in the world to hit but it should get you over a grand or two. Then just ditch the van.

Merry Fucking Christmas!

Schmoop said...

Mike: Yeah....there is that. Cheers Mike!!

Scott: How about this. I knock the old dude over, roll him, and take his bell. Ryan really digs bells. Cheers Scott!!

Ken said...

With not having any kids of my own, that I know of for sure, I've pretty much said fuck it to Christmas.
Tell you what I'll donate to the little one (ha, I agree with Knight), every box of Christmas decorations and lights that I personally hefted out of my last house and into this house five years ago that have not even come out of the closet. All of them. Trust me, it's not a little donation and who knows how much it could fetch on the black Christmas market in these tough times.

Or, I could build a kneeling pad for Ryno.

Schmoop said...

Micky: Ha!! Make sure the Christmas lights are all twisted the fuck up and only a third of them light. Cheers Mick!!

Schmoop said...

Di: As one of his greatests microphones I am dismayed as well. I think perhaps Jesus is testing my mettle.

So, as I want to pass this test, there can be no crime spree, however, we could get together for a Sex Spree!! There's no crime in that!! Cheers Di!!

Paige said...

you had me at beiber...well not really...but you know what i mean

You can Call me AL said...

Holy Crap!

When I was 16 year old wee lad....... Where in the hell were girls like knight?????

The fact she looked it up and the way she replied ......Morgan Web, move over. Knight is taking your place tonight in the mind of AL.

Schmoop said...

Paige: If that's what it takes; that's what it takes. Cheers and thanks for the comment Paige!!

Al: Ha!! Knight is HAWT, and she sang to him for his 16th B-Day a month and a half ago. Who needs Chrsitmas? Cheers Al!!

desert rat said...

Well, shit. This does suck.

(Is that legal in Ohio?)

Schmoop said...

Rat: EH, it is what it is. 'm not the only one out of work. On the upside...Ryno was both appalled and extremely amused by the radio show topic. Cheers Lovely One!!

David said...

Geez Louise - I go on a simple little Caribbean cruise and come back to find IWS has moved again - now to Thursdays - and the glorious pride of the Beer Mine, Matt-Man, has been dismissed from his duties and paycheck.

What can befall us next???? Oh the humanity! What about the childrens?