Showing posts with label Baby Jeebus. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Baby Jeebus. Show all posts

Wednesday, December 02, 2009

The Merry Christmas Billboard Ladies Are Back And Jesus Hates Them

The Merry Christmas Billboard Ladies are back for another yuletide go ‘round with retailers who refuse to use the words, “Merry Christmas” in their advertising and/or prohibit their employees from uttering the phrase while servicing customers.

Judi Hanna, Linda Bennett, Joanne Brown, and Pat See from warm and wonderful northeast Ohio are pressing on with their crusade to decorate our highways and byways with billboards that attempt to put Christ back into the Saturnalian festival that has become Christmas.

These ladies are as mad as heck, and aren’t going to put up with the snubbing of the birth of the Little Baby Jeebus.

As Ms. Bennett so eloquently puts it:

“It’s not a secular holiday... as Christians we have a calling to follow God’s example ... he gave us his son. We need to take the Gospel message and help those less fortunate…The billboards remind people what Christmas is really about ... the gifts are secondary,”

If you go to this group’s Home Page, merrychristmasbb.com you will see that they are indeed more concerned with celebrating the birth of Christ than participating in the commercial orgy that is Christmas:

Retailers would prefer to offend 78% of Americans who consider themselves Christian by taking Christ out of Christmas. They prohibit their retail employees from saying Merry Christmas, or from displaying anything referring to "Christmas".


The same retailers want business from Christian customers, and rely on Christian customers for the vast bulk of their business during the Christmas season.

This same seventy-eight percent of Americans account for a 37% increase in clothing sales, a 137% increase in jewlery sales, and a 46% increase in electronic sales in November and December. Without Christmas, retailer's bottom line would be devistated.


See the connec--…Hey, wait a minute…Are these chicks attempting to put Christ first during this time by threatening to “devistate” the bottom lines of retailers selling jeans, “jewlery”, and iPods who don’t say, “Merry Christmas?”

To me, that logic is non sequitur. In fact, if I were Mr. Spock, smoke would be coming out of my big Vulcan ears right now.

The ladies threatening to take food out of the mouths of merchants and their sweet little children, is not very Christ-like. It is a mockery before the eyes of our Lord and Savior, Jeebus Christ, and for that, Jeebus hates them.

In fact, his hate for these women is equaled only by their inability to spell the words, “jewelry” (the way they spell it sounds anti-Semitic, hmmm?) and “devastated”.

Okay…Okay…Jeebus doesn’t hate, but he is no way thrilled with this brood of boneheads.

Jeebus, doesn’t want people wishing him a Happy Birthday. While he would probably appreciate the brotherhood and harmony that takes place at this time of year, he would be appalled by the commercialism and boycotts that are initiated in his name.

Most importantly, I for one, know that Jeebus would prefer to see “jewlery” sales drop 137%. He is not a big fan of “jewlery”. The Romans giving him a thorny tiara and piercing his hands and feet, kind of turned him off to such baubles.

Anyhoo…

Like it or not, Christmas has for many Americans become a secular holiday, and these ladies through their implied boycott are willing participants.

Christmas for all that it has become is still a great time of year.

Whether one says, Happy Holidays, Seasons Greetings, or Merry Christmas, Good will is still shown… Good times are still had…Good works are still done.

And, that’s just fine by me.

Cheers!!

Monday, April 06, 2009

Jesus Effing Christ!!

I like to use expletives frequently. I try to use them as a form of emphasis and/or just to be rude.

Well since this is Super Happy Hole-ly Jeebus Week ™, I thought I should cut back or refrain altogether from cussing on here.


Especially avoiding the phrase where I say, Jesus Fucking Christ.

It wasn’t just my idea. Jeebus told me to try to clean my language up during His special week.

He said to me last night…

“Matt-Man, I love you, but please, try to stop using such colorful language. If I can do it; you can do it.”

Now for those of you not as intimate with The Lord as I, the “if I can…you can…” line may seem odd. Well, trust me it’s not.

Ol’ Jeebus may be the Son of God, but in addition to being that and a sarcastic practical joker, the boy used to cuss up a storm.

Damn straight, he did.

He used to call his apostle John a big girlie man and shout at him in Greek saying things like, “John ya big sissy, you are such a Kappa. Upsilon. Nu. Tau.”

He used to refer to Pontius Pilate as a, "mealy mouthed dago pussy." And referred to Romans in general as, "pasta eating pig fuckers."

I think Jeebus’ dad finally told him to cool it when he said to an adulteress woman…

“Neither do I condemn you; go and sin no more, you dick twizzlin’ ho-bag.”

Jeebus now swears very rarely, however if I happen to mention Joyce Meyer to him he usually let’s out a…

“Screw that used up, lyin’ ass, douche bag.”


Ha. That one always cracks me up, because his face always shrivels up like a rotten bell pepper when he says it.

So anyway…Since it is Super Happy Hole-ly Jeebus Week ™, and because Jeebus asked me to, I’ll try to control my bad language. Especially any phrase that uses his name and the F-Word.

However, if I see something funny that may contain some bad language such as that, I may falter and post it. But, I’ll try to be strong and refrain from doing so.

Do you think I’ll be strong enough?

.

.

.

.





Ha. I didn't think so either.

Have a wunnerful Monday.

Cheers

Tuesday, March 31, 2009

Blitzkrieg Benny and the Bagwine Easter Tree

Twelve days to go until Jeebus resurrects hizzelf.

As you can see, I have the Bagwine Holiday Tree decorated for the festive, life renewing event.


A video on that later.

However, while I looove the Baby Jeebus…His self-proclaimed mouthpiece, Pope Benedict XVI, has pissed me off once again.

Yep, Blitzkrieg Benny during his recent tour of Africa, said that condom use is evil. “No Condoms, Dammit!!”, he said.

Okay he didn’t say, “Dammit.”, but he said that they shouldn’t be used.

He says that condoms will cause more problems than they will help to prevent the spread of AIDS.

Benny, just because you were lecturing while touring the Dark Continent doesn’t mean you have to remain in the Dark Ages.

I know…God doesn’t want the gift of sperm-driven life wasted merely on the pleasures of sexual gratification, but…

What the hell? Should we take you and your Priests lead on how to practice birth control?

And no, I’m not talking about celibacy.

I’m talking about boinking 12-16 year old boys. I mean, yeah, that’s an effective method of not getting anyone pregnant, but c’mon!!

Sure, a good Priest can help to inject a person with the Holy Spirit, but damn…


Does he have to initiate a religious schism between a young boy’s ass cheeks to do it?

And another thing…Why can’t women be Priests?

Y’know…If you Joan of Arc, Mary Magdalene, or even the Virgin Mother herself were alive today, they would not be permitted to be Priests?

And as I said, still today, the Catholic Church is speaking out against responsible, safe sex and birth control practices.

The Catholic Church, and the current Nicene Nazi are just not getting it.

The hierarchy of that Church blows, and that is why I haven't considered myself a Catholic since Notre Dame won the National Championship in football back in 1988.

In fact, I think all organized churches blow. Jeebus never needed a church. He just needed a crowd with whom to discuss peace, love, and understanding.

And that my friends, is how it should be. And how I wish it was today.

And now…A short video of the Bagwine Easter Tree.


Enjoy, Bitches!!

Cheers!!

Monday, March 30, 2009

Do Not Give Me This Day, My Daily Bread

I started my meatless Lent at 187 pounds.

A week ago I was at 181, and yesterday I hopped on the scale to check to see if I had cracked that mythical 180 mark and perhaps would weigh maybe 179 or so…

Ha…Pictures don’t lie, Bitches!!


I’m back up to 1 frickin’ 85!! WTF!?

How could this be? I eat egg salad, tuna fish, beans, salad…I’m at a loss.

Okay, maybe it’s all of the mayo in the tuna and egg salad, and of course I put that shit in sandwich form. I eat biscuits with my beans.

I eat grilled cheese and this past week we had cheese pizza twice. Ya see a common theme with these things?

Uh-huh…BREAD!! It’s been a Bread-O-Frickin’ Rama ‘round here of late.

Hell, bread based foods have even invaded our health food cabinet.


Crackers, Cheese Nips, Cheesy Fries, Brownies, Swiss Rolls, cookies, corn chips and more…frickin’…bread. Unbelievable.

Except in its beer form, I am off the bread until Easter. No Mas. And guess what else I’m going to do…

Come Holy Week, I am going to fast (once again, that doesn’t count beer and Bagwine) completely on that Thursday, Good Friday, and Saturday.

No food for those 72 hours. I am going to hit that 179 pound mark and come Easter Morning I’ll be one holy, woozy, hung-over son of a bitch.

So let it be written; so let it be done.

And now, to end…a pretty picture for your Monday morning.

Schmoop and I aren’t big Birthday people, but I did buy some flowers for Schmoop for her Birthday the other day.


Pretty, no? And what’s more romantic than placing them in a Budweiser beer stein? Nothing. Even Jeebus liked the array.


Praise be to Jeebus and to a pretty bunch of Alstromerias.

Have a lovely Monday, all.

Cheers!!

Tuesday, March 24, 2009

The Pocket Fisher of Men

I’ve got a problem with The Almighty.

On Sunday, several children (as well as some adults) died in a plane crash in Montana…500 feet away from the runway, nonetheless.

It makes me sick to my stomach. It makes my heart hurt.

It also makes me wonder, not necessarily if God exists; I'll allow for that possibility...


It makes me wonder what the hell kind of being this God is.

Don't tragedies like this make you wonder?

Believers will tell you that God is Omnipotent, Omnipresent, and Omnisci...Omnisee...um...and Omni-Knowing.


Even if I stipulate to those three things as fact, that doesn't necessarily make God Omni-Beneficent.

Why didn’t he save those little kids? Why didn’t he raise his almighty hand and guide the plane safely to the airport?

Well, some may say that through their death those around them will appreciate life more. It will show them that life is fleeting, and they should make the most of it.


And...That those kids are now with the Lord in Heaven and some day, just like the kids, your suffering will pass and Heaven will seem even more glorious than can be imagined.

Fuck that.

If The Almighty is using kids (or anyone for that matter) in this manner and for those reasons, he's nothing more than a Madison Avenue marketing magician.

Dostoyevsky, one of my all-time faves, once stated that if God is using the death of children to fertilize the garden of life, he is not all-good.

I agree...Anyone, whether it be me, you, or The Almighty, who uses others, is far from all-good, and in a word, sucks.

Of course, this use of others is a two way street. So called people of piety use God all of the time.

In his name, they attempt to make law, shame others, and try to collect a tidy personal fortune along the way.

Uh-huh. These people are using God, Jeebus, and others to create a little Heaven on Earth.

And, maybe that's the master plan. People like Benny Hinn and Joyce Meyer use God, and God uses others...each with their own purposes.

Perhaps, God did make man in His image, and God looks and acts alot like Billy Mays or Ron Popeil.

And maybe, when one's life on Earth is done, he or she is transported to God's Kingdom where they live 24/7 in a late night infomercial for all eternity.

If this is God's plan for me....If this really is as "good" as he gets...

I may as well place my Bible in the closet, and Just Set It and Forget It.

Cheers!!

P.S. Today is Meg's (Prefers Her Fantasy Life) Birthday. She stopped by Bagwine briefly a couple of weeks ago and I got to meet her.

She is complaining about being older, but trust me...She's hot and it appeared that she has great boobies. So, click HERE and go wish Meg and her boobies a Happy Birthday!!

Sunday, January 11, 2009

Sunday Morning Church Disservice: Faced With a Dilemma

It’s gonna be a cold and gray Sabbath here in Bagwine, Ohio today.

The high will only reach 26 today, so the Drive Thru is going to be a cold and painful place for me today.

I will be spending eight hours doling out the imbibeables inside of a virtual icebox.

Brrrrrrrrr.

It’s supposed to get even colder later in the week, which has lead me to a bit of a conundrum.

I’m thinking about growing a full beard. I mean, I have had my goat for a few years, but haven’t had a full beard in ages.

It’s hard to tell from the picture, but I have let more than my goat grow in for a couple of days now.

I’m not used to it; it itches me, but a full beard could offer some protection from the harshness of the bitter cold of January and February in Ohio.

Will I look stupid in it I ask myself.? Will it detract from my dashing good looks? Will people see me as some kind of caveman?

Will anybody even notice and/or give a shit? These are the burning questions on my mind…and on my face.

I don’t know what to do. Should I go all Billy Mays on you all? I need your guidance, folks.

I prayed to the Baby Jeebus over this.


He responded by telling me that facial hair wasn’t his bailiwick, however, he did suggest that I choose a different earring for my next picture.

Jeebus is a hoot.

Well, there you have it. Let me know what you think.

Schmoop has already weighed in on the issue.

She said that if I grow a full beard, less of my face would be showing, and that wouldn’t be such a bad thing.

She’s such a bitch so precious. She kids because she loves.

Well my friends, if you have an opinion please pass it along.

If you’d like to tell me that I really need to concern myself with more important things, that’s fine too.

Happy Sabbath to you all.

Cheers!!

Wednesday, December 24, 2008

Christmas Eve in Bagwine


It’s Christmas Eve in Bagwine, Ohio.

The excitement is palpable and on every block, in every house, on every stove...the meth is cooking up.

For me, I have to wrap some presents early today. Pick up Ryno later, and then…

Head to a brother’s house to party down with my clan.

It’s always an incredibly drunken fun time. Okay…it’s both fun and drunken.

After that I will spend the night over at Ryno’s house…on the couch…four feet from the fireplace in which the ex has built a raging fire so I toss, turn, and sweat all frickin’ night.

She’s clever that way. Ha. But it is a good time and worth being there Christmas morning when my not so little guy wakes up.

Schmoop and I will be “celebrating” here tomorrow. I may post a couple of pictures tomorrow of our Christmas festivities.

Check in, if you need a break from the kids and the family.

Well, I must get wrapping. I wish you all a Very Merry and Safe Christmas. But before I go…

a Christ-Ku...

Baby Jeebus Eve

Time to wrap, and greet, and wish

Pass me the Bagwine


Cheers!!

Tuesday, December 23, 2008

The Truth About Christmas

Christmas is upon us, but…

How many of you are aware of the actual events took place lo, those many years ago?

As Vinny mentioned in a comment yesterday, I have been serving up religious history on occasion for roughly 2 ½ years.

Unlike the blather you here at church or read in textbooks, I give you the truth.

Jeebus was actually born on September 29, 5 B.C., not December 25, 0 A.D.


The fact that he popped out of Mary’s Holy Hoo-Ha nearly five years before he was due, makes him the most premature baby ever.

Was the Baby Jeebus born in a manger? Yes he was.


There actually was no room in the inn, but it wasn’t because Bethlehem was full of people participating in a census.

The real reason?

The First Annual Judea-Palooza Concert was going on. Bands from all across the Middle East and other Roman territories were there.

IX Inch Nails, Better Than the Book of Ezra, Genesis, The Ecclesiastics, and even that new Asian Sensation, Buddhist rock band, Nirvana was there.


It was emceed by a very young, and up and coming, Morey Amsterdam.

It was the first time in recorded history that Jewish entertainment promoters sold overpriced concert T-Shirts.

Conversely, it was the last time in recorded history that when people in that area of the world “rocked”, it didn’t mean throwing stones at each other.

So, Mary and Joseph were lying around in a stable with some smelly farm animals while PETA members (Philistines for the Ethical Treatment of Animals) were protesting outside.

Just then a star appeared over the stable…well, it was actually a pyrotechnic gone awry during an encore performance by the Greek band, Boyz II Men. Anyhoo…

Three Wise Men, named Re-Run, Raj, and Duane followed the light, Mary’s holy water broke, and out popped the Holy Baby Jeebus.

There was no Little Drummer Boy. There was no fanfare. There was no fruitcake.

However…

Two angels appeared over the scene…


They were winged twins sent by God to honor the birth of His son.

Their names were Micah bin-Harold and Malachi bin-Harold.

The twins broke out into angelic song.

And that is when the Wise Man, Duane uttered…

“Hey, Hey, Hey…Hark!! The Harold Angels Sing.”

And that my friends, is what truly went down during the first Christmas.

And it is the truth…because I believe it.

Cheers!!

Wednesday, December 17, 2008

Let's Get Jiggy With Kwanzaa

Christmas, Hanukkah, and New Year’s Eve/Day…

The long time Holy Trinity of the Holiday Season.

However, in 1966 some upstart social academic decided that this time of the year needed a little ebony mixed in with all of the red and green.

Maulana Karenga founded a seven day celebration of African and African-American culture known as Kwanzaa.

There’s a candle lighting, a feast, gifts, and some kind of drinking going on. There’s an observance of things such as unity, faith, cooperative economics, purpose, blah, blah, blah.

Eh, sounds pretty boring to me. It has caught on here and there, but just isn’t taking off like the robust parties that take place for Jeebus followers and Jews.

Kwanzaa’a problem? It needs to be marketed, updated…commercialized. Only then, will it take off among black Americans.

Not wanting to be referred to by the bruthas as , "The Matt-Man who is keeping me down.”, I of course, have a few suggestions to help put Kwanzaa on the Holiday map.

First of all, ditch the multi-candle thing. The Jews already have the menorah.

If you want to light something, light something you’re familiar with…like a crack pipe.


Hell, do this every day for seven days, and even your white neighbors will be interested in celebrating with you.

Despite its religious foundations, Christmas offers some exciting, more secular traditions. You know, like Santa Claus.

You guys need to incorporate a jolly, gift delivering, midnight rider. Since Santa is taken, and keeping with your African theme, I suggest this guy…


Yep, Bantu Claus…riding threw the Kwanzaa sky in his wildebeest drawn wooden cart, delivering toys made by pygmies, to the good little black children.

He would playfully say, “Yo-Yo-Yo” in place of Santa’s “Ho-Ho-Ho” to avoid waking up black women all across the country who may think there’s a major booty call going on.

And since I am suggesting dumping the menorah, you can add color to your event with a Kwanzaa Tree. We, unlike uptight Jews, are happy to share our symbols...It’s a pagan thing anyway.

Here’s what I think would be a tree that you folks would all be happy to share and gather around…



And to all of my bruthas out there…this tree is nothing like how you feel about certain aspects of sex with the ladies, this is something even you would eat. Kwanzaa-Licious!!

If you do want to inject some religious solemnity into Kwanzaa, you need to have a human figure representin’.

I suggest a tale of how all of you of African descent can trace your roots back to a single baby boy. You can call him, The Masai-Uh.

A story about how he was found alone in an abandoned warehouse by some folks named Mel, Dre’, and Weezey would be cool.

You can refer to the holy trio as, “The Three Social Workers.”

See? Just a few adjustments and your Kwanzaa celebration will go from flat to phat in no time.

There is one problem with Kwanzaa, however, that just can’t be overcome.

You see, both the Christian and Jewish celebrations are based in fact.

Christians celebrate the birth of the Baby Jeebus…a boy who was fathered by an invisible man and given birth to by a woman who never had sex.

While a bit less exciting but no less true, the Jews have their magic candle. That burned, and burned, and burned….

As mentioned earlier, you guys are celebrating things like self-determination, creativity, and responsibility. You call that reality?

Gimme a break my brothers and sisters, you really think that type of celebration is gonna fly in America?

Do what we do. Dump the principles and any type of holiday meaning. It’s all about the bling.


Cheers!!

Tuesday, December 09, 2008

Baby Girl Says, "Death to Jeebus!!"

The Christmas season is a time of year that I still enjoy with all of the exuberance and joviality that I did when I was but a wee lad.

However, Christmas is a bit of a conundrum as well. It brings out three different things in people.

It brings out the best in people. It brings out the worst in people. And…

IT BRINGS OUT THE STUPID IN PEOPLE!!

See the picture of the cute, innocent looking doll? Don’t be fooled by her puerile charm.

Beneath that girly façade lies the automated heart and soul of an Islamo-Fascist mind control expert.

Her name? Little Mommy Real Loving Baby Cuddle & Coo Doll. Her game? Converting your 3-7 year old to the darkness that is Islam.

Mattel, specifically Fisher-Price, is trying to taint the birthday celebration of the Baby Jeebus by marketing a doll that says, “Islam is the Light.”

That is what those chicks with far too much time on their hands over at Moms Ask Mattel for Accountability (MAMA) are claiming…and railing against.

Here’s video evidence…




Stunning, no? I am shocked and outraged that Mattel would permit such a thing. Just think of the ramifications…

This Christmas morning, little 4 year old Suzy will be playing with Cuddly and Coo, and next Christmas she’ll be wearing a burkha and strapping a dirty bomb to herself.

Those bastard toy makers. They knew full well that little girls across America would pick through the electronic mutterings of the doll and succumb to its prime directive…Convert the Infidels!!

Iranians? Pffft, they got nothing. Hamas? Dirt eaters. Al-Qaida? Pussies. These groups are paper tigers in the grand scheme of things.

We should be more concerned about the 9 year old factory workers in China who mass produce these Muslim Mannequins of Death for Mattel.

Our Christianity and American way of life are being threatened by this toy of terror, and I’d like to thank these assholes MAMA for bringing it to our attention.

Godspeed you morons beauties of activism for our Almighty Lord and Savior, Little Baby Jeebus.

And now some pictures…


I splurged and bought us a new tree today. I call her, “Treesa”.


If you read yesterday’s post you may have picked up on the fact that my kid loves Grippo’s Bar-B-Q potato chips. They’re the best. And so, one present I have bought for him is this…


Yep, a whole case…Three pounds of Grippo’s Goodness. Lastly…I bought a new festive chapeau…


Anyone want to sit on Matta-Claus’s lap? Ho Ho Ho.

Cheers!!

Sunday, November 30, 2008

Sunday Morning Church Disservice: First Sunday of Advent

“For unto us a child is born, unto us a son is given: and the government shall be upon his shoulder: and his name shall be called Wonderful, Counselor, The mighty God, The everlasting Father, The Prince of Peace.”

Isaiah 9:6

The prophet Isaiah, or as I call him, Izzy, said words to that effect nearly 2,800 years ago. He prophesized, the birth of the Holy Baby Jeebus.

Most think that Izzy’s visions were divinely inspired; I however, think they were the result of smoking too much Assyrian grass that had been tainted with goat piss.

Nonetheless…

Today marks the first Sunday of Advent in the Christian church…a period marking the anticipation of the Virgin Mary spittin’ out the infant J-Man from her most Holy Hoo-Ha.

Today, we light the first of four Advent candles, the Candle of Hope.


While the lighting of this candle marks the preparation of making one worthy through grace and communion to befit the Lord’s arrival…

In the Catholic Church, it is also an igniting of hope that this year’s Advent services will be far shorter in length than previous ones.

We have already had a bang up start to the Jeebus Birthday season…

A trampled to death Wal*Mart worker, gunfire over X-Boxes, and Bill O’Reilly’s War on Christmas hard-on warming up in the manger.

Merry Fuckin’ Christmas, indeed…This Christmas season is going to be great!!

And tomorrow, here at Bagwine Ruminations, we shall kick off our month long tribute to the holidays.

Christmas, Hanukkah, and that quasi-holiday celebration of Kwanzaa shall all be covered with the discerning professionalism that only my staff can deliver.

Be Afraid Merry…Be Very Afraid Merry.

We will post some traditional Bagwine stuff…Some new music, videos, and pictures of the tackiest of decorations that can be found here in my lovely town.

Tomorrow, we will start with my second installment of, Under the Bagwine Christmas Tree. I will be handing out virtual presents to Schmoop and to Sometimes Saintly Nick.

Weather permitting, I will also shoot a video tonight after work of our downtown and its Christmas decorations, and post it tomorrow as well.

Aren’t you excited? Amen and Halleluiah, I know damn well you are.

So with that…I am working all day again today in the beer mines. I hope to catch up with you all on Monday.

Let the final days of the Jeebus Gestation period begin!!

Cheers!!

Friday, November 28, 2008

Don't Give Baby Jeebus a Black Friday Eye

Wow…

What a wonderful Thanksgiving we had here at the Bagwine digs.

The food, prepared lovingly by Chef Me, was fantastic. We drank mucho grog, and I phoned a few friends and family members.

I hope all of you had an equally good time…Not a better time, just…equally good.

But all good things come to an end, I guess.

I have to work tonight and ALL frickin’ weekend. ALL day Saturday, and ALL day Sunday. Such is life; I shall muddle through.

At least it’s sunny. A sunny day in Ohio in late November is a rare as a one sentence answer from Joe Biden.

I guess that a couple of short posts this weekend, and a quasi-respite away from the computer is actually a welcome thing.

I don’t want to just jump into the Christmas season frivolity here at Bagwine Ruminations, right after Thanksgiving.

I refuse to be like the department stores who mock Thanksgiving and use today and this weekend to usher in the crass commercialization of the birth of the Holy Baby Jeebus.

(Mad Low Prices at My Café Press Shop…Click on the Bagwine Tank Top on the Left!!)

I’m above the fray as far as bastardizing such a (Want Matt-Man on Your Hoo-Ha? Buy a Bagwine Thong!!) season of solemnity, with greed and avarice.

This next month will be the most offensive holy tribute to the Christians, Jews, and Kwanzaa celebratin’ mo-foes ever witnessed here at Bagwine Ruminations(Which Offers Quality Products via Café Press…just click HERE)

So folks, enjoy your Friday and your weekend (Enjoy it Even More in Your Bagwine T-Shirt!! Your Friends Will Be Green With Envy!!)

I’ll be around here and there with a couple of brief posts, but I am going to idle things down here over the weekend.

Until the Kick-Off of the Holy Baby Jeebus Season on Monday…

Cheers!!