Wake Up With Al and The Weather Channel...A Less Than Dynamic Duo

Early Tuesday morning, I was thinking about the July 20th debut of The Weather Channel’s, Wake Up With Al show…again.

Thinking about my boycott of said show, I began pacing (I think better when I pace) through the Bagwine digs, when something caught my eye.

Upon looking out of my window, I was struck by a beautiful view. I went outside and snapped the picture that you see to the right.

Between the delicate pastels of the sky, the cooing of a mourning dove, and the low hum of the traffic, I felt at ease.

It was a feeling that I hadn’t experienced since I was but a mere fetus swirling, swooshing and swimming around within the warm, moist comfort of my mother’s vodka laden amniotic fluid.

Because of this feeling, I temporarily eschewed my displeasure with TWC and my loathing of Al Roker. With a summery smile upon my face and a spring in my step, I went back inside.

I sat down at my computer, opened my e-mail, and read the following:

Hi Matt,

Thank you for your letter. Clearly you are a passionate, long-time viewer of The Weather Channel, and we are grateful for that. We appreciate your honesty and willingness to share your feedback about some of the things we are doing. As you might imagine, we cannot please every viewer with everything we do, so our goal when we make changes is to appeal to as many viewers as possible. The majority of our research and viewer feedback indicates we are moving in the right direction.

I understand that this may not include you and may not address your specific concerns, but please know that we have reviewed and considered them, as we take all viewer feedback seriously, including those I will get due to your blog direction.

Thank you again for contacting us. I do hope you may, in time, reconsider tuning to The Weather Channel, but we are always happy to hear from our viewers and appreciate you relaying your position.

Sincerely,
Melissa Medori
Public Relations Associate Manager
The Weather Channel
www.weather.com/press

I thought that was incredibly nice of Ms. Medori to respond to my letter of intent to boycott and to check out my blog. And, in such an incredibly quick manner I might add.

I gave second and even tertiary thoughts to my proposed boycott after reading her well thought out response. She seems so sincere and nice, and…I bet she’s hot.

I mean, I went to High School with five chicks named Melissa and all of them were good looking…but I digress.

Maybe, I thought, I should give Al “Global Warming Is The Result Of The Vapid Carbon Emissions That Emanate From My Mouth Whenever I Speak” Roker another chance. But, later in the day I snapped a picture of this:

It’s a picture of cirrocumulus clouds obstructing the sun and forming a mackerel sky. I knew then, that we in Bagwine, Ohio may be in for some storms within 12-24 hours.

Which made me ruminate…If there is a severe storm threat between 6 and 7 A.M. during the weekdays…

Do you want Al “Now, Tell Me Again…What’s The Difference Between a Warning and a Watch” Roker helping out the smart and uber-pleasing to the eyes meteorologist, Stephanie Abrams, or would you rather have another well-informed meteorologist manning that Doppler?

I think the answer is clear, and it leads me back to my original position. I will boycott The Weather Channel as long as NBC’s corporate clown and shill, Mr. Roker is employed by TWC.

I’ll find my forecast and warnings elsewhere…I hope you’ll join me, and if you have a second, be sure to email the most kind and responsive Melissa Medori at:

mmedori@weather.com

and let her know that you are, Just Saying No to Roker. Or if you're in a hurry, just type in, Just Saying No-ker.

Knowing that you have let your opinion be heard will keep me singing in the rain…

Lastly, I want to let you know that this boycott is being joined by the one and only Cynical Bastard hizzelf, Jay.

Yes, Jay has become, like me, a TWAT. Those Wanting Al Tossed.

For the mighty Viking of Arkansas’ take on this and his open letter to Ms. Medori, stop on over to his site by clicking HERE.

Remember folks…Take shelter when a tornado warning is issued. Never play golf during a thunderstorm, and never…And I mean NEVER, Wake Up With Al.

Cheers!!

Wake Up With Al and Boycott The Weather Channel

Okay people, listen up.

It is now T-Minus 7 days until my beloved, The Weather Channel, forever sells its meteorological soul out with the addition of Al Roker to its lineup.

As I mentioned last Friday, on Monday July 20th The Weather Channel will be airing, Wake Up With Al from 6-7 A.M. on weekdays.

Why is a network which has based its nearly 30 year existence on meteorological excellence selling out to the sea of mindless goo that is Cable TV?

Well, NBC owns TWC now, and the times they are a-changing’. But this, you already know. So why I am posting about this topic again so soon?

Because Bitches, I am upping the atmospheric ante. I am calling for a boycott of The Weather Channel, or as I now call it, The Blather Channel.

Boycott them now…Boycott them ’til Al “I’m Not a Meteorologist but I Play One on TV” Roker dissipates like a hurricane hitting wind shear.

Most of this interjection of Gastric Bypass Boy is the fault of NBC and Lisa Gersh, interim CEO of The Blather Channel, and who, while working for NBC, played a key role in the buyout of TWC. Listen to this nut’s comment…

"Simply put - Al Roker is synonymous with weather. He has an energy and a style that jumps off the screen, and we already know that people want to wake up with him in the morning."

Did Gersh say this with a straight face?

Hell, the only things that jumps off of the screen when I see Al Roker is a nitwit whose minimal knowledge about weather rests on a cue card that was undoubtedly written by an actual meteorologist.

And Mizz Gersh, seriously, if a person wants to wake up with Al, they shouldn’t be at home watching his new show, they should be confined to a mental institution…wearing restraints…inside of a box…that has no air holes.

When NBC took over TWC, they let go longtime on-camera meteorologists Cheryl Lemke, Dave Schwartz, the newer but always smiling Eboni Deon, and other staff because of “costs”.

And now, they hire a no-talent goob like Roker? Sweet Baby Jeebus, how much does that cost TWC? Not only monetarily, but in terms of credibility.

I am done with The Blather Channel. I hope you’ll join the Matt-Man, a longtime fan of TWC, in this full on Bagwine Boycott of TWC.

Please e-mail Melissa Medori who is the Associate Manager of Public Relations for The Blather Channel at:

mmedori@weather.com

Tell Ms. Medori that you will no longer watch The Weather Channel until they return to their roots and Roker is swept away like a compact car in a Flash Flood.

You can also tell Medori this…That you are part of a boycott led by the group now, and forever known as the …

Those Wanting Al Tossed-Team. (T.W.A.T.-Team)

Indeed, let Ms. Medori know that you are part of the TWAT-Team. I hope you’ll join me in being one loud mouthed and serious Twatter by emailing her.

Cheers!!

Update 10:06 A.M.: Hee Hee...Looks like someone just leveled the playing field:

Visitor Information:
65.202.103.197 (THE WEATHER CHANNEL) [Label Visitor]
Location:
HUNTSVILLE, ALABAMA, UNITED STATES (WEATHER.COM)
Last Visit Time:
July 13, 2009 9:48:53 AM
Length of this Visit:
0 hours and 3 minutes
Page Viewed This Visit:
1
Returning Visits:
0
Entry Page:
http://bagwine.blogspot.com/2009/07/wake-up-with-al-and-boycott-weather.html
Exit Page:
http://bagwine.blogspot.com/2009/07/wake-up-with-al-and-boycott-weather.html
Referrer:
No referrer

Fuck Al Roker, I Want a Real Tornado Warning

Boy, Oh Boy do I have something to get off of my chest.

Listen up, Bitches. I have of all things, a complaint about TV.

Now listen, I’m not someone who watches much TV at all. No, not because I am some type of elitist, but because the only TV that I typically watch is as follows…

News/Political Talk Shows…Sports…Seinfeld Re-Runs, and The Weather Channel.

It is the last mention, The Weather Channel, that has me furious. And trust me, the last time I was furious was when I found out that Schmoop only came once during our sex session last night of June 14, 2008.

Laugh all you want, but trust me, I am pissed at my beloved Weather Channel. The meteorological muthafuckahs have sold out.

Let me ’splain.

Remember when MTV used to play music? Remember when VH-1 did the same? I know…I do too.

Of course they decided to go against their own grain and start showing and producing their own, “eclectic” productions.

The Real World…Tia, I’m an Ugly Bisexual Bitch Idiot…Best Week Ever (Hosted by B-List Comedians and Actors in Rehab)

Oy Vay, and What the Fuck!?

Well my friends, The Weather Channel, which had been on the same slippery slope, has finally and completely jumped the shark and gone the same way as MTV and VH-1.

Starting July 20th, The Weather Channel will air a new segment on weekdays from 6-7 A.M. called, creepily enough, “Wake Up With Al”.

And who is the Al, with you and I will be awaking? Al Fucking Roker. That’s right. That big tub of vacuous, chocolate pudding that is Al Roker.

Holy Cow!! Or should that be, Holy Occluded Front!?

Listen up, my friends…I am quite the amateur meteorologist, and know more about weather than the average person. And, this action by The Weather Channel?

Well…it sticks deeply within my dew point, and my barometer is tossing mercury left and right.

I understand that NBC bought the Weather Channel, but does that mean that they need to sodomize America by showing Al Roker on TWO networks instead of one every weekday morning?

The Weather Channel has Jim Cantore, Mike Seidel, Heather “I Love Thunderstorms” Tesch (purrrrrrr) and other ACTUAL meteorologists.

Why do they have to rain on my TV breakfast and pee on my eggs by thrusting Roker on me?

I hate Roker…First of all, he’s not an ACTUAL meteorologist and secondly he’s a hypocrite.

When Imus was on MSNBC, Roker said that he loved him and had always listened to him. Roker went on Imus’ show, and pimped his book.

When Imus called the Rutgers ladies b-ball team a bunch of nappy headed ho’s?

Roker was "OUTRAGED!!" Mainly because, Roker had already used Imus in order to pimp his book.

Gimme a break…I don't know, but I do hope Roker‘s stomach staples will someday give way. I do know a couple of things, however.

The Weather Channel is going to get ruined by NBC and their hiring of people who are not ACTUAL meteorologists in order to turn a profit.

And…

Al Roker is going to be struck down dead by lightning while eating a ham and cheese sandwich.

At least that’s my hope.

Cheers!!