“I clearly think Christianity is better, which is why I practice it, but that is not the reason I am against the masque (sic) at Ground Zero. I am against it because it would be a thorn in the eye of anyone who lost a loved one on 9-11.”
--Karen 7/26/2010
I dig Karen. Always have…even though she is a raging Republican. No, not a raging conservative, a raging, right wing Republican.
Someone who follows lock step with FOX News, Rushbo, and Sean Hannity.
I think Karen, my ol’ pal Uncle Charlie, and others of their political ilk, have lost their minds…especially when it comes to this “mosque” controversy in NYC.
Republicans like these two, and there are more than a handful, believe in America Uber Alles. They believe in Christianity Uber Alles. They “believe” in the Constitution Uber Alles.
They don’t follow all of those tenets, but two out of three ain’t bad.
I find it ironic that Karen, who is a lawyer by education, yet evidently is less than that by practice, is against the building of a mosque near the former World Trade Center buildings..
She can utter all the anti-Muslim crap she wants, but the law says that if zoning approves, the house, or in this case, the “mosque” shall stand.
Karen, and other Americans can say they will “hurt” if a mosque is built on this “sacred” or “hallowed” ground, but really, you need to get over your religious bigotry.
You need to get over yourselves and your unfounded agony and treatment of one of the world’s oldest religions.
Say what you want about Islam, it is no less believable than Christianity or Judaism. Seriously…
A kid born because an invisible man impregnated a woman? A candle burning for eight crazy days because an invisible man made it so? Gimme a break.
I can’t stand all of the furor over the differing beliefs. I hate it!! But I do know one thing…
One of the cornerstones of this country was that it was built to allow the free, unfettered, practice of religion.
Some Muslims want to build a community center and mosque near the site of the World Trade Center attack. So?
Some “Americans” say, “No way, Muslims are evil!! They should not be allowed to build a place of the Devil’s worship.”
To those nay sayers, I say…
How about this? We’ll build a Catholic Church, a Jewish Temple, and an expansive Evangelical parsonage on the site, and all will be right with God.
Of course, if we do that, we are also doing another thing that may be second only to our love of “the one true God”
That one thing being, peeing and shitting all over our Constitution.
It’s ironic that Tea Baggers and their right wing ilk are behind this movement to stop the building of this Muslim center and mosque, ’cause let me tell ya…
If Jefferson were alive today, he would say to them, “Are you morons fucking crazy?”
Of course then he would say, “Hey Matt-Man? Know any hot, black chicks in the ’hood?”
Cheers!!
I have a bit of Hump Day Hodgepodge for you all today. Shall we begin? Great…
If you read Bagwine Ruminations yesterday you are aware that I talked about the residents of Englewood, New Jersey being none too pleased that Muammar Qaddafi may hold a soiree on the Libyan estate located there next month when he comes to address the United Nations.
Karen of, Smiling Through It All, suggested in her comment to me that since she lives near Englewood, she could tell Qaddafi through Mayor Wildes that he is welcome at The House of Bagwine and that he should pay me a visit.
I thought about her comment for a second, and then said to myself:
“Damn right he’s welcome here. I’d dig the chance to meet him and his cadre of sexy, female bodyguards.”
So ladies and gentlemen…I fired off an e-mail to the Libyan Mission office at the UN. What follows is a copy of said e-mail:
Dear Diplomatic Corps of Libya,
I have read that your Leader Muammar Qaddafi will be in the U.S.A. next month to address the U.N. General Assembly.
I have also read that many people in the State of New Jersey are complaining that he may want to entertain guests at the property that the Libyan Government owns in Englewood, N. J.
I am offering you the opportunity to visit my apartment in Ohio. If you want to see how a typical American couple lives, you are more than welcome to stop by our place and stay awhile. I'll even cook for you and your bodyguards. Purrrrrr.
I have even dedicated my daily article to the ghastly non-welcome you are receiving from the residents of New Jersey. Here's the link:
http://bagwine.blogspot.com/2009/08/muammar-qaddafi-muammar-gaddafihowever.html
If you are interested in familiarizing yourselves with "typical" Americans and being welcome at the same time, please let me know, and we'll set something up. It would be an honor and a pleasure.
I hope that you and your folks are enjoying your Ramadan season, and please let me know if we can make this visit happen.
Sincerely,
Matt-Man
Springfield, Ohio
xxx.xxx.xxxx (phone number)
www.bagwine.blogspot.com
I haven’t heard back from them yet, but I hope to soon. Thanks for the idea Karen. I’ll get you an autographed picture of Muammar should he take me up on my invitation.
If you’d like to help me in my quest to bring Qaddafi to my home, you can e-mail the UN Mission of Libya at the following address: libya@un.int Tell them Matt-Man is a helluva guy and a great host. Thank You.
Next item…I just found out a couple of days ago that over the last few months, that the Chicago Sun-Times has published 11 of my posts on their website. Cool, no?
The most recent one was my Palin Picnic post. Here is the link to it as it appears on the Sun-Times website: CLICK HERE
As a demonstration of how sarcasm and sardonic wit runs in the family let me share something with you. I sent an e-mail to one of my brothers telling him about my posts appearing on the Chicago Sun-Times website.
This particular brother is a journalist by trade and had been an editor and reporter for a major newspaper for years. I thought he’d appreciate knowing this fact. His response in typical family fashion was the following:
This sez something about the state of today’s newspapers: Resorting to Bagwine to pump up circulation. But who knows? It may be the answer to the industry’s ills.
Ha…Our family is so warm, so caring, so god damn funny. His response made my day; thanks bro.
It’s almost football season folks and you know what that means? The Jay-Man has created a Fantasy Football League again this year. I played for the first time last year and it was fun because Jay makes it easy to play.
Well, our draft is coming up Thursday so I am going to be spending today and tonight after work ranking players so I can try to draft who I want. Last year my team did pretty well. They had a good name too. They were called the Bagwine Boners.
This year? Based on a suggestion from my son Ryan, this year’s team has a new, more fearsome moniker. What is it, you ask?
The Jonas Brothers!! Go Team; Fight Team; Winnnnnnnn Team!!
Speaking of Ryno…He is now officially a High School Freshman. He began school yesterday, and of course, before I took him to school I had to have him pose for a picture…
I guess he hasn’t discovered what a blow dryer is yet. Good Luck to Him, and to all of you…
Have a wonderful Hump Day.
Cheers!!
The next three days I thought I would explore Thanksgiving from the past, the future, and the present.
Today…Thanksgivings past.
I was trying to recall my earliest memories of Thanksgiving. I had trouble. Every recollection seemed pretty much the same…wonderful.
Mom, Dad, and the nine of us kids crowded together in the house. The older boys and the oldest sister would swill beer, and smoke cigarettes, as we watched football.
Mom would cook. Dad would try to find a quiet place to hide, and the youngest sister would be writing yet another love letter to her Medical Center dreamboat, Chad Everett.
For the most part, I simply remember the fantastic smells, all of us playing football in the backyard at halftime, and most of all, the laughter.
One thing we were never short of in our tightly packed house was laughter. In fact, an odd, but ultimately humorous tradition began one Thanksgiving.
The origins of why it was started and by whom have become a hostage of time and the fading memories among the clan.
My Mom, St. Mary Anne, had a huge picture of Pope Paul VI in the living room. One year, one of the kids drew a mustache on him. It was in magic marker over the glass.
When Mom saw it, the heavens shook, she yelled, and took on the form of Gabriel while threatening to punish the culprit with smacks on the butt from her feared bolo paddle.
Fortunately, for us all, Divine Intervention in the form of a kitchen timer sounding, saved our souls, and our asses.
Every Thanksgiving thereafter, even into adulthood, somebody would draw a mustache on Pope Paul, and in all of our juvenile glory we would laugh…Mom, most of all.
I do have one other Turkey Day memory that I may have briefly mentioned a long time ago. I was 16 or 17 and dating Sherri a sweet young girl.
After Thanksgiving dinner, we went to a party that an older brother’s friend was having. It was bitterly cold for November.
After a few unde
rage drinks, our teenage hormones kicked in and we needed to act upon our cornucopia of dirty thoughts.
Well, my friend and I headed out into the 20 degree night and started making out in front the house, near the street.
Within a matter of lustful minutes we were lying butt naked on the sidewalk, “giving thanks” to each other, and performing our version of “Pilgrims Gone Wild”.
The sex was good, well, as it good as it can be for teenagers. But, I did learn one very important thing that night.
Sex in 20 degree weather may make a chick’s nipples rock hard, but it does little to encourage the growth of a guy’s cock.
And man, my little wank needs all the encouragement it can get. For learning that fact so early in life, I am truly thankful.
A couple of things before I go…First of all, Karen? You are evil. Because of your comment to me yesterday, I now have to make dressing and gravy as well for T-Day dinner.
I hope you realize that you just added 15 minutes 2 hours to my work on Thursday.
And lastly, a Inky and Lola-esque cartoon from last Thanksgiving season. It is proof positive of my mad, artistic skillz…
Cheers!!
Say what you want about Islam, it is no less believable than Christianity or Judaism. Seriously…
