Sunday Morning Church Disservice: Basketball and Corned Beef

It’s going to be a cool and cloudy Sabbath here in Bagwine, Ohio and there is madness in the March air.

It’s a big week ahead…

This evening across America, college hoops players and fans everywhere will be jumping for joy, crying in their beer, and many crying foul.

The 2011 NCAA Men’s College Basketball Tournament brackets will be announced around 7 tonight.

Later tonight, I like so many other folks, will begin filling out my bracket so come Thursday evening I can watch my prognostications slowly lose hope and then crash and burn like Stewart Payne.

But, my crappiness in picking winners will be tempered by the fact that Thursday is also St. Patrick’s Day.

Come Thursday night I won’t care about my picks because I’ll be passed out on the couch with an empty bottle of Wild Irish Rose in my hand, my tongue green from beer, and corned beef and cabbage stains on my shirt.

Erin Go Braugh, Bitches!!

Amen, and Amen…

That’s all I have for today so enjoy your Sunday. I’ll be watching the bracket announcements with Ryno this evening and then I’ll head home and catch up with some of you later tonight.

Cheers!!

Sunday Morning Church Disservice: Spring Has Sprung

It’s going to be a decent day weather wise in Bagwine, Ohio today.

My 11-7 shift on this Sabbath at the Beer Mine shouldn’t be too bad at all.

As you know, Saturday was the first day of spring according to the calendar, however…

In addition to the calendar, there is another way to know when spring has sprung in Bagwine. It’s when folks around our part of the country see the following…



Damn right Bitches, Matt-Man’s pasty white chicken legs made their 2010 debut Saturday and let all who drove by and through the Beer Mine know that spring is officially here.

Damn I’m sexy…even if it does look as though I’m sporting some serious camel toe oddly enough.

There was one setback to the day yesterday. Just a little ways down the road there was a car accident.

I hope it was not the result of one of the drivers involved being temporarily blinded by the alabaster pixie stix that are my legs.

Today is also a big day in a Beer Mine related way.

Our fearless leader, Drive-By Mikey is celebrating his Birthday. Yes indeed, drive-thru entrepreneur, singer of songs about his prostate, and legendary pig inseminator turns 44 today.

He is an impressive guy in many ways but what I truly find impressive is just how deep and reflective he is…

And of course, how can you not like a guy who can somehow manage to have sex with a case of bottled water?

Here’s to you Mikey, may your birthday be a good one.

Amen, and Amen.

Have a wonderful Sunday all and to St. Mary’s College which defeated Villanova (the school which I picked to win the NCAA tournament) on Saturday, I just want to say…

You goddamn Catholics fucked me again didn’t ya? Happy, now?

Cheers!!

Sunday Morning Church Disservice: Jump Ball

I have to Praise Jeebus for Jay for today’s post…

I sent him a picture of this cheerleader from Morehead State and said the following…

"Exactly what this chick is cheering about is written all over her chest."

Jay in turn, made mention of a Catholic school that had made a tournament.

In fact, Catholic universities have made a profound impact on the NCAA tournament this year…

Dayton, Boston College, Marquette, Gonzaga, Siena, Xavier, and most importantly Villanova have made one helluva crappie crunching impact on this year’s tournament.

However, Jay sent me a picture of some fans from a Catholic University, in Nebraska of all places, that while they should have made the NCAA tournament, wound up in the NIT, the Creighton Blue Jays…

WTF? Is this what the Baby Jeebus wants from Catholic institutions?

A T-Shirt wearing chick who is never going to get laid, begging to give a blow job?

Screw the anti-Christ-like harlots in this picture...

I for one am offended by the fact that someone who is giving up junk food during Lent sent me this picture.

Is Jay merely giving lip service to the Holy Baby Jeebus? Is he firm in his love for the Lord?

I hate these types of pictures. They are misogynistic, disgusting, hot, and sinful.

Jay…while my initial thought is to rebuke you, I pray for your soul.

Repent, my good man…repent.

Amen, and Amen.

That’s all I have for today. I am working all day on Sunday, and then off to see Ryno.

Until the 'morrow…Enjoy your Sabbath.

Cheers!!