Sunday Morning Church Disservice: Shake Down The Thunder

It’s going to be a cool yet sunny Sabbath here in Bagwine, Ohio today.

Although, I doubt if it will be as cool as the reception that President Obama gets from the alumni at Notre Dame University.

So, President Obama is going to speak at Notre Dame today. Oh my God!!

Get It?

I’m sorry Bill Donahue. I’m sorry Pope Benny. I’m sorry to all of you priests who ruined the lives of little boys.

(Albeit it was a tiny percent who besmirched your calling because of a few assholes…so to speak.)

More than the Priests involved, I’m sorry that the Vatican bureaucracy and dioceses tried to cover up that fact of the abuses.

Yeah, so, Obama is pro-choice. Many American Catholics are as well. I understand your, private University status and all of that, but…

Could you, the Catholic Church, not try to make up for your own hypocrisy by making a “stand” against a thoughtful guy like President Obama?

You may ask, why I use the word “thoughtful.” I am not talking about respectful and well-mannered.

I am talking about “thoughtful” in the sense, that he thinks. Obama thinks. By God!! We have a President who thinks!!

And not one who thinks what he thinks, but rather, one who is open to new and different ideas and thoughts.

I find that refreshing. As refreshing as the beauty of the Eucharist and the Holy Water. Bathe in its glory, Donahue; you religious bigot, dirt bag. And by the way, try Confession, you need it.

I won’t get to see it live, but I have no doubt that President Obama will make the best of a “bad” situation.

He will, in his usual way, wax poetic about personal growth and being all that one can be, as it should be during the course of a commencement.

This entire thing is a joke. It’s the President of the United States for God’s sake. Get over yourselves.

Bush 43 spoke at ND, and he was a HUGE Death Penalty advocate. I know, you Catholics are big on thumb screws, but c’mon…

Let me give you protesters and gnashers of teeth a little Sunday morning St. Augustine...

"If you believe what you like in the gospels, and reject what you don't like, it is not the gospel you believe, but yourself."

Amen, and Amen.

I am not typing this to argue the virtues or lack thereof of abortion, that will never change anyone‘s mind either way. I am saying this…

Notre Dame prides itself on being one of the finest Universities in the world. It is a bastion of learning, thought, exploration, and Catholicism.

In spite of its religious roots, can it not live up to those traditions and allow for Obama, or anyone for that matter, with differing opinions, to speak?

Are some of the University’s staff, alumni, and more importantly, donors, afraid to have their faith challenged?

Evidently so. And the funny things is, President Obama will not make a case for the legality of abortion.

He probably will not even mention it, other than in passing to recognize differences of thought and the great American right to protest.

He will simply tell the grads, in a very eloquent way, to do their best. As it should be.

Cheers!!

Sunday Morning Church Disservice: Faith is a Funny Thing

As you may know, Pope Benedict XVI has been here in the U.S. for the last couple of days.

Benny will even say Mass today at Yankee Stadium.

Can you imagine how many smelly, hung-over, micks and dagos will show up for Communion? Oy Vay!!

Of course, his visit cannot go without some type of controversy. Comedian Bill Maher has supplied that controversy.

This past week Maher, who is vehemently anti-all religions, referred to Blitzkrieg Benny as a Nazi who wears funny hats.

He also said that had Benedict been in charge of a chain of day care centers, instead of the Catholic Church, and covered up sex abuse, he would have been fired and jailed.

Oh the Humanity, Mr. Maher!! How dare thou!?

Outrage over these comments abound from the likes of Faux News and Crappie-Crunching whack jobs such as Catholic League President, William Donahue.

There have even been calls for a boycott of Maher’s TV show and for the network on which he appears, HBO.

My sage, spiritual words to those of you who are offended:

Get over yourselves, and suck it up, you whiny, thin-faithed bastards. Amen.

Be you Christian, Jewish, Muslim or one who worships the mochachina beauty of Tyra Banks’ breastesses, ignore the slings and arrows cast upon you.

I poke fun at Catholics, Jews, evangelicals such as Rod Parsley and Joyce Meyer, and will in the near future, take on Islam.

My religious rants hopefully have, and will continue to elicit a strong laugh from my readers; however…

If my satirical diatribes bring about an outrage in someone stronger than that of the intended humor...

Does that not mean that my words are more powerful than that person’s faith?

If one truly has faith, no matter what that faith may be;

No words, no jokes, no satire, should be able to shake that faith, or elicit the gnashing of teeth.

And that my friends, is my message for this Sunday.

Amen, and Amen.

And now for our Sunday Serenade…Since we have discussed the topic of jokes and the ensuing outrage, I offer you the following.

I am a big fan of the Bee Gees’ music up until they decided to adorn platform shoes and become the Belles of the Disco Ball.

Here is a tune that pre-dates those days.

I’ll be gone most of the day today, but I will catch up with all of you and your blogs tomorrow.

Cheers!!

If you get the chance, listen to Turnbaby’s Blog Talk Radio Show tonight at 8 EDT. For details, click HERE.