Obama Addressing School Children: How Dare That Communist Bastard Do That!?

I have had it. No, really, I have HAD it.

President Obama has a video feed set for Tuesday September 8th that will have him asking for school kids to do their best and work hard during this school year.

How partisan can a group of people…right wing talk show hosts, pundits, and yes, many parents be? Jeebus, Mary, and Joseph!!

Fuck Em….

I have nothing other than that to say…Indeed, I can only say, Fuck Em.

Okay…that’s not true, I can say more than that.

Has a large portion of Americans simply lost their goddamn minds? Is a large portion of Americans saying:

“Screw that Kenyan born motherfucker; how dare him ask my kid to do well in school.”

From Glenn “Oligarhy” Beck, to Laura “Keep Your Kid Home From School” Ingraham, to Michelle “My Eyes Are Not Only Slanted, They Are Three Feet Apart” Malkin, and a host of other low IQ fanatics have been bashing Obama over this.

People like these morons and others like Billy Cunningham of 700 WLW, and Rep. Greer (R-FL) are saying that Obama is attempting to indoctrinate our youth….

Some have said, that much like Mao, Kim Jong Il, and Stalin, the O-Man is trying to lure our children to Socialism..

Gimme a fucking break.

Yes, our representatives of late do nothing but watch their own backs, however…

The people who elect said representatives have devolved into a series of cable TV and sound byte impulses.

They think not for themselves, and in many cases, they think not at all. And many, eat this "indoctrination by Obama conspiracy" shit up.

This anti-addressing of American students is the last straw for me.

I think I am fairly reasonable…I think in some aspects of life, I am quite smart.

However, I have over the years, at times, thought maybe I was a bit crazy. With the stupid right wing smack down that is going on over this crap, I have finally realized that I am not crazy.

Although…

I wish I was crazy like these dumb asses, because it would make life so much easer.

Cheers!!

And...I just thought of this...Many of those protesting Obama, would have no problem with public prayer and "Christian" leaders giving a video message and "indoctrinating" kids in public schools.

Euna Lee, Laura Ling, and Bill Clinton's Egg Roll

Former President Bill Clinton after being out of office for eight years proved on Tuesday that he is still The Man.

Bill Clinton flew to North Korea, or as it is officially known, “Democratic Peoples Republic of Korea” (that name still cracks me up) and less than 24 hours later, he lifted off to return back to the U.S. with recently imprisoned journalists Euna Lee and Laura Ling in tow.

The charm, persuasion, and charisma of Clinton was too much for the Crazy Motherfucker-in-Chief of North Korea, Kim Jong Mentally-Il to resist.

After spending time with Clinton, Krazy Kim pardoned the journalists who had been sentenced to twelve years hard labor for illegally entering the paradise that is North Korea.

Hell, I guess the two had a great meeting and good times discussing things other than the fate of the two journalists.

Kim even held a State Dinner for former Prez Clinton.

I don’t know how Clinton felt about that, because it’s kind of hard to get excited about a meal consisting of fettered water, tainted rice and dirt sandwiches. But, it’s the thought that counts.

Anyhoo…Clinton pulled off the release and I say to him…

“Way to go my man. Your years of having Al Gore by your side have given you unparalleled skills in dealing with crazy people.”

Oh how we need to send Clinton elsewhere in this world full of people whose cranial glue has melted.

I truly think his actions and successful negotiations are strokes of beauty. I hope other people recognize that as well. I seriously doubt that anyone else could have pulled this off. Kudos, Mr. Clinton.

It reminds me of the time fifteen years ago when former President Carter visited North Korea. He was smoothing things over on behalf of our two nations…and that worked pretty well too.

Eight years after Carter’s peace and humanity talks with the North Koreans, he won the Nobel Peace Prize and the Koreans had a nuclear weapons program. Talk about your win-win situation!!

I can’t see where this effort by Clinton will win him the Nobel Peace Prize, but I wouldn’t feel too badly for Clinton. Being a man who has no ego, Clinton is not into awards, praise, or acknowledgement.

No sirree; he is into one thing, and one thing only…

Is it personal success? Is it his sense of duty to his fellow man? Is it simply his adherence to the Golden Rule? No…

Bill Clinton is really into chicks of Asian descent. And trust me, while he won’t get a major award for his actions, all the way home, he was eatin’ at Euna and Laura's Sushi Bar.

I hope the three of you had an incredibly hot, steamy, and bumpy flight home together.

Congrats to Bill Clinton and a warm welcome home to Euna Lee and Laura Ling.

Cheers!!

It's Go Time!!

There are only a mere five months until the Presidential election.

It appears my two most noteworthy opponents will be Sen. Barack Obama and Sen. John McCain.

As I am a sensitive soul, my campaign will be above board, stay focused on the issues, and of course, be full of rude, personal attacks.

Take John McCain for instance, he’s old.

He’s pushing 72 and I am a mere 43 years old.

Should our nation engage in talks with the Iranians that could forever bring peace to the world, and these talks go past 9 P.M. at night, I would still be at the table…and McCain?

Johnny Mac would be in bed, fast asleep, happily dreaming of his breakfast of Cream of Wheat and prune juice.

Consider this scenario…

Kim Jong Il will no longer act like the crazy despot that he is, if he can videotape the President of the U.S. having sex with a half dozen Korean prostitutes.

I am typically a breast kinda guy, and therefore not a big fan of Asian chicks, however...

I would happily get Oral-ental with six Korean kuties, if it would make the world a better place.

Consider me, Matt-Man: The Prick of Peace.

Could Old Man McCain do that? Of course not, for two reasons. One, he can’t raise his right arm, let alone his middle leg.

And number two…He’s gay. It's true...'cause I believe it.

Step aside Grandpa Tinkerbell, Matt-Man is runnin’ the show.

And what about Obama? Hello…Black Man.

A black guy has as much chance getting elected as a wheel-chair bound husband of a lesbian does. Okay, bad example…um

As much chance of getting elected as a second rate actor does…er…I’ll get back to you on that one.

Obama, is also a Muslim. Oh sure, say that he isn’t really and it’s a lie created by right wing bloggers, but as I like to say, “If you believe it, it’s not a lie.”

Oh yeah, for the next five months I am going to beat these two like rented mules.

And now a message for our vacationing buddy, Dana…

I did you a favor and broke into your checked on your house…I will wash your bras and underwear when I get done wearing them. Also, you might want to pick up some Vodka on your way home.

Cheers!!