Friday, September 24, 2010

Matt-Man’s Private Conversations™

It’s Friiiiiiday and you know what that means. That’s Right!!

It’s time for another installment of Matt-Man’s Private Conversations™

Thursday evening at the Beer Mine talking to Pizza Bill…

Me: Yo Billy-Boy can you use your van to help me move a couch from David’s house over to the apartment the first Sunday in October?

Bill: I’ll have to take the seats out, but sure.

Me: Thanks. Schmoop said that if you helped us out she’d show you her tits.

Bill: Hee Hee.

Me: Ha…Naw, I’ll pay ya.

Bill: I’d rather see Schmoop’s tits.

Me: Deal!!

Thursday morning taking Ryno to school…

Me: I’ll pick you up this afternoon. I’m going to park in that cornfield way behind the baseball diamond.

Ryno: If you park way back there, when I eventually do get to the car, I’m gonna park my fist in your face.

Me: Ha!! Good One.

Monday morning talking to Schmoop following Sunday’s post tryst admission fall out…

Me: You’re not going to work today?

Schmoop: No…I feel like shit this morning. I’ll just blame Dana. Ha.

Me: Ha...I’ll tell her.

Schmoop: And when you do, tell her to stop being a whore!! I did. I mean, shortly after you left your wife and moved in with me, I did.

Me: Ha. Hey-Oooooooo

Schmoop: I crack myself up…ugh, I’m going back to bed.

And that’s it for this week’s installment, but I do have a few things to pass along to you chuckleheads.

First of all, this past Tuesday I wrote about and professed my love for national radio talk show host, Leslie Marshall. Well kids, now dig it.

She read it Tuesday night and got a hold of me via Twitter. We had a brief Twitter convo and she was incredibly sweet.

I just want to say thanks to her for taking the time to read it and actually contacting me. Here’s to the lovely Leslie. Cheers to ya, Mizz Marshall!!

Today marks the 51st birthday of the sexiest librarian in the world, Bagwine buddy, Michele!! I want to give a big ol’ Happy Birthday to Michele. Have a wonderful day, dear!!

Lastly, I’m With Stupid will once again rear its ugly head at 11 AM EDT Sunday on Blog Talk Radio. Please join Jay and myself for some Sunday morning fun.

In addition to our weekly NFL picks and my weekly fucking by Time Warner, we will be talking about bad and/or funny things that have happened to us while drunk.

We invite you to call in and lay your stories on us as well.

And, since many of you will be listening to us with a hangover, we will also discuss what our favorite hangover foods are.

Off today so I’ll be whoopin’ it up I hope you all do the same. Have a good one!!

Cheers!!

23 comments:

Jay said...

Oh hell. If that's what one gets for helping you move a couch, I'll drive up there and we can tie that couch down to the roof of my car and I'll transport if for ya. ;-)

Matt-Man said...

Jay: I'm pretty sure you could just drive up and watch US move it while you drink and Schmoop would still be more than happy to show YOU her tits. Cheers Jay!!

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Matt-Man said...

Post: I'll get right on that. Cheers!!

Dana said...

Well I never!

OK ... maybe just once!

Any chance you and Jay can post the hangover foods shopping list prior to the show so that we can let you know which one is working while we listen to the show?

Matt-Man said...

Dana: I think we'll wait, because most people have a hangover AFTER listening to us. Cheers Whore!!

Mike said...

"She read it Tuesday night.."

Do you think she checks the net for stalkers? Has the restraining order showed up yet?

Matt-Man said...

Mike: Ha...She told me she read it, ya goof. I even got an "OMG ur funny." Cheers Mike!!

Evil Twin's Wife said...

So, if I just talk about celebrities I want to stalk, I mean TALK to, I can lure them in with the blog? Excellent!

Dianne said...

that's cool of Leslie to twat - uh - tweet you

Ryno mentions punching you in the face often - I like that about him

I will miss the show again this week
I have to go down dah pawkway to see some people
fucking real life getting in the way

Matt-Man said...

Evil: Ha. See? See how easy that is? She actually was incredibly nice and had good things to say about the post. Cheers ETW!!

Matt-Man said...

Dianne: Yeah it was pretty cool. And damn...I hate it when life gets in the way. Have fun though. Cheers Sexy!!

Raquel's World said...

Wonder if showing my tits to the power company will lower my monthly bill? I never thought of that.

Matt-Man said...

Raquel: I dunno. You could try it, but if you would, please wait until I get a job with the power company in your area. Cheers Roc!!

Beth said...

Good things it's Bill and not Mikey thats helping. God only knows what he would want as payment!!!

Matt-Man said...

Schmoop: HA!! You are correct. I think if Mikey helped, it would end up that you'd either have to pee on him or pay out the ass...so to speak. Cheers and Zooooves!!

Scott Oglesby said...

So did Schmoop over have to whip the puppies out or did he get drunk and forget about it?

Joker_SATX said...

I think Bill got a good deal there....

I am going to try my best to make it on Sunday. I feel I may have a story to tell....

Matt-Man said...

Scott: It hasn't happened yet, but I have no doubt that Schmoop will "pay off her debt". Cheers Scott!!

Joker: Sweet. The more the merrier Joker. Enjoy the weekend and hope to hear from ya on Sunday. Cheers Joker!!

Michele said...

Thank you for the birthday greetings.

So you are now tweeting with celebrities. Now, I can say I knew you when.

Matt-Man said...

Michele: I've hit the big time...or something. Happy Birthday Michele. Knowing how you talk about JR, I'm sure you guys will have fun. Enjoy!! Cheers and once again, have a wunnerful B-Day, Michele!!

MysteryChick said...

Between you and Evil Twins Wife, Friday is my favorite blog reading day!

Hmm, I may even be able to come up with a drunk story (or fifty) on Sunday. I seem to get dropped on my head a lot when I've been drinking! Hmmm, that might explain some things.

Matt-Man said...

Chick: That would be fantastic if your legs called in...er...you called in. I hope you can listen and join in Chick. Cheers!!