Hello folks, and Happy Monday!
Oh who the fuck am I kidding. Mondays blow for everyone…regardless.
So what is on your agenda this fine day? Yeah, me too.
Hey, I forgot to mention something. Matt-Man. Are you ready for this? Has a new stalker! Hee!
That’s all I’m going to say about that. Hee!!
So if you’re like me, you are stuck in an office with bugs, crumbling, crippling front steps, bats, (yes I said bats) and asbestos flowing like rain.
Oh, you’re not like me? Well then my friends you have NO idea what you are missing!
One good thing, my work cohort brings me the GRANDE cappuccino at least two times a week. Oh how I love the Speedway.
I’d like to give a shout out if I may, to several people. If I may. Bitches…please.
I’ve never done this, but since it is my blog, I’ve decided to acknowledge the talent, and funny shit of other blogs that I read all the time, but they do not know, because I never comment.
I only have something to say on my own blog, and of course on, I'm With Stupid.
So on Mondays, I am and shall list three blogs that I read, and love. Check them out. Seriously, check them out, or I’ll cut ya.
Dooce is a given, morons. The bitch has a trademark for God’s sake! I love her, some do not. Jealous much? Yep.
Anyhoo, here is this week’s:
Trinity of Internets Talent…
Bye Bye Pie (June Gardens)
Mommy Wants Vodka (Aunt Becky)
I'm With Stupid
(I was forced…by Jay no less)
Next week, there will be three more. This is a public service announcement.
Kisses my Pretties, and until tomorrow, when the saga continues…
Zoooooves!!
P.S. Listen to my boys Jay and Matt-Man on I’m With Stupid on Blog Talk Radio Monday at 11:00 AM EDT.
They will be talking about New York’s gay marriage bill, and I’m sure they will mention Michele Bachmann a time or two. God only knows why…
You can check out their radio page HERE, and their new companion IWS website by clicking HERE.
It’s Friiiiiiday and you know what that means. That’s Right!!
It’s time for another installment of Matt-Man’s Private Conversations™
Thursday evening at the Beer Mine talking to Pizza Bill…
Me: Yo Billy-Boy can you use your van to help me move a couch from David’s house over to the apartment the first Sunday in October?
Bill: I’ll have to take the seats out, but sure.
Me: Thanks. Schmoop said that if you helped us out she’d show you her tits.
Bill: Hee Hee.
Me: Ha…Naw, I’ll pay ya.
Bill: I’d rather see Schmoop’s tits.
Me: Deal!!
Thursday morning taking Ryno to school…
Me: I’ll pick you up this afternoon. I’m going to park in that cornfield way behind the baseball diamond.
Ryno: If you park way back there, when I eventually do get to the car, I’m gonna park my fist in your face.
Me: Ha!! Good One.
Monday morning talking to Schmoop following Sunday’s post tryst admission fall out…
Me: You’re not going to work today?
Schmoop: No…I feel like shit this morning. I’ll just blame Dana. Ha.
Me: Ha...I’ll tell her.
Schmoop: And when you do, tell her to stop being a whore!! I did. I mean, shortly after you left your wife and moved in with me, I did.
Me: Ha. Hey-Oooooooo
Schmoop: I crack myself up…ugh, I’m going back to bed.
And that’s it for this week’s installment, but I do have a few things to pass along to you chuckleheads.
First of all, this past Tuesday I wrote about and professed my love for national radio talk show host, Leslie Marshall. Well kids, now dig it.
She read it Tuesday night and got a hold of me via Twitter. We had a brief Twitter convo and she was incredibly sweet.
I just want to say thanks to her for taking the time to read it and actually contacting me. Here’s to the lovely Leslie. Cheers to ya, Mizz Marshall!!
Today marks the 51st birthday of the sexiest librarian in the world, Bagwine buddy, Michele!! I want to give a big ol’ Happy Birthday to Michele. Have a wonderful day, dear!!
Lastly, I’m With Stupid will once again rear its ugly head at 11 AM EDT Sunday on Blog Talk Radio. Please join Jay and myself for some Sunday morning fun.
In addition to our weekly NFL picks and my weekly fucking by Time Warner, we will be talking about bad and/or funny things that have happened to us while drunk.
We invite you to call in and lay your stories on us as well.
And, since many of you will be listening to us with a hangover, we will also discuss what our favorite hangover foods are.
Off today so I’ll be whoopin’ it up I hope you all do the same. Have a good one!!
Cheers!!
I’ve really got nothing today and I am working through the day on Tuesday so I won’t be around until tonight.
So…
I have a handful of questions for you that hopefully will offer me grist for future posts beginning Wednesday. If you have a minute and feel like answering, by all means, lay your truth on me…
No matter how ugly it may be…Answer one, answer a few, or answer all…after 9:15 A.M. EDT, it’s a Matt-Man Free Day until Tuesday night. So, here we go…
*When you blog or even more so, when you comment on blogs, do you couch your message in a way to agree with a reader or writer so he or she will like you? Maybe even thinking you might "get some" off said person in the future?
*What if anything (‘cause I know I’m damn near perfect) really irritates you about me? Be Honest…I have big shoulders. And yes, you too can answer this as well Schmoop.
*If you are into sex lubricants, would you prefer a bacon grease based lube, or sausage gravy?
*Is the Obama Beer Summit going to result in a positive result for race relations, or will it merely result in two bruthas smackin’ down a white guy over an argument as to whether the beer tastes great or is less filling?
*Do you prefer Corned Beef Hash or Roast Beef Hash? Or…are you one of those goofballs who doesn’t like either? (Sorry Michele, as much as I dig ya, but to answer my first question, I don’t couch my message on the basis of liking someone.)
*Would you like to have sex with me? If not, why not? If so...when will your husband, significant other, and/or common sense be away from home for awhile?
Okay…I think that gives you all some points to ponder…or not. Have a lovely Tuesday, all.
My normal routine begins again on Wednesday.
Cheers!!
