President Obama and Communism: Holy Cow, I Never Knew He Had All That Power!!

I have a problem with my country. Indeed I have a problem with all of America. We are on the brink of losing our democracy.

The thing is…

It is not because of President Obama…It is not because of most Democrats and Republicans in Congress.

Hell, it’s not even because of Glenn Beck, Keith Olbermann, and other propagandists who appear 24/7 on Cable TV.

No, my friends…

We are losing our glorious democracy because, well…Americans are stupid, and they have a herd mentality. Well, not all, but a sizeable minority do. And, it is fucking up our country.

There is a website I read more than once a day because I am a “folk hero” there because I leave comments that run against their grain. That’s right, it’s a site called Sarge Charlie.

The guy is a hoot. He’s a Vietnam Vet and as you know, Vietnam Vets are untouchable when it comes to love for their country.

They love their country more than you and I, and…many of them are just flat out, insufferable.

In fact, along with many Beck-Tards, many "patriotic" Vietnam Vets think Obama is a spineless weasel, who knows nothing about the military. Take for instance, Ol’ Sarge….

Ol’ Sarge would say that if Obama took a crap, he didn’t wipe his ass correctly. And, if Obama blew his nose, he would say, “Did you see how he directed that sneeze towards a Vietnam Vet?”

What a dick.

Hey Charlie…while you are getting treated for your affliction (which I hope you beat) on the government dime, why don’t you tell people how much you hate government health care?

Oh, that’s right, you do. How I-Fucking-Ronic.

More so than Charlie, his readers are over the top ideologue nuts, and definitive of the craziness that is going on in this country.

Take for instance, the nut job named Gracie…

This wacko chick, who claims to be a Christian, imparted her wisdom on how the U.S. should deal with Afghanistan, and here is her well-developed foreign policy plan:

“The Afghanis are fierce, always have been. We need to give notice ahead of time and then bomb the holy hell out of them. We already know they’ll put babies and women on the front lines.”

I guess giving them notice first, is her idea of Christianity.

Call me crazy, but I thought if we were trying to instill democracy into a country, turning said country into a glass factory wouldn't be the best way to go about that.

Of course, I am but a novice in affairs such as this, but that plan seems silly, unless of course, one is heavily invested in Mason jar futures.

Oy…My point is, is that these Beck-Tards think Obama is going to turn our country into some type of Soviet state.

If they think that Obama is that powerful, doesn’t that suggest that they don’t believe in the power of our Constitution and the separation of powers? Uh-Huh…

Who among us, doesn’t believe in our democracy? Evidently it isn’t me. It’s those two “patriots” and millions like them.

Anyhoo…Schmoop told me to let all of this go. She said that these people aren’t worth it…And she’s right.

However…

Just like I need to call out a jerk who thinks that all that I am is a schmuck who works at a Beer Drive-Thru, I need to call out the stupid that exists in this country.

I’m much more than a schmuck, and this country is much more than a land of morons.

The informed majority, whether they agree with this administration or not, need to speak up…and speak out. And most importantly, do it in a learned way.

Cheers!!

Glenn Beck Is An Asshole, But He Is Not Who He Appears To Be

I announced back on September 15th the founding of a new political movement called, “The Speleology Coalition”.

It is a coalition of people who politically, are open to new ideas, think for themselves, and are not right or left wing psychopaths.

In my announcement, I discussed Plato’s, Analogy of the Cave.

I talked about how folks who watch, listen, and nod in blind agreement with the likes of Keith Olbermann and Glenn Beck are merely watching shadows on a wall and accepting them as real.

When I wrote that, my mind kept going back to Glenn Beck and what an asshole he is. I knew that he reminded me of someone from the past with whom I was familiar.

However, I couldn’t quite put my finger on who it was. It’s been driving me crazy.

Here’s this guy, Glenn Beck who can emote with tears at the drop of a hat…who can then shut off the waterworks and go on a tirade against non-existent threats to our nation.

Beck will then look into the camera with his empty eyes and speak directly to his legion of Beck-Tards, by channeling and often misquoting Jefferson, Madison, other Founding Fathers, and sometimes even God Almighty.

He is now calling for a day of Prayer and Fasting during Yom Kippur in order to save our Republic. Ha...Like Glenn Beck is going to be able to fast for a day. Freak.

He’s an amalgam of paranoid goof, carnival barker, fear monger, and ratings whore. Most of all, he is simplistic and loose with oh so many facts.

But hey, Beck-Tards don’t mind, even when he calls President Obama a racist. Beck-Tards simply clench their fists and yell: “Damn Right Glenn, Off with his Head!!”

Beck will incite his considerable audience with intellectual gems such as, “President Obama is addicting this country to heroin---the heroin that is government slavery.” Or this one…

“The president has an agenda that is radical, revolutionary, and in some cases, MARXIST!!”

I was still trying to put my finger on the person of whom Beck reminded me, and then, yesterday morning, the clouds blocking my recollection began to part.

I had partially figured it out. He reminded me of a game show host. But which one, I thought.

Bob Barker? Alex Trebek? Or my favorite, Wink Martindale? No, none of those fit the in your face lunacy of Beck, nor do they have that burning hate and fear.

I was trying to think, and then in my head, I could hear the voice of the game show host I was trying to recall saying things like, “You Bastard. Drop Dead!!”…and, “Who loves you, and who do you love?”

And then, the quote that jarred my memory like a juggernaut, fired up my synapses, and involuntarily left my brain, came out of my mouth:

“Hello, this is Killian. Give me the Justice Department, Entertainment Division.” And it hit me…

Holy Cow…Glenn Beck is Damon Killian!!

Damon Killian was the game show host character that Richard Dawson played in the Schwarzeneggar movie, The Running Man.

Killian and Beck are cut from the same oil cloth. They both play upon fear and the worst and basest instincts of people. And it doesn’t matter to them, only the ratings do.

As Killian said, and I can hear it coming from Beck’s mouth as well:

“This is television, that's all it is. It has nothing to do with people, it's to do with ratings!!”

Hey Beck…I’ll Be Back, and one other thing. Suck It!!

Cheers!!

*For those of you interested, Jay-Man has written a brilliantly funny post that offers advice to my slacker son. You can click HERE to read it. Thanks Jay!!

*Holy Crap, one other thing...My nephew and his wife, Jamie, are in California today. She made it on to Jeopardy and they are taping today. The show will air the week of October 19th. Wish her Luck!!

Beck, Maddow, Hannity, and Followers Thereof...The Speleology Coalition Is Going To Stick The Stalagmite of Common Sense Up Your Ass

Over the past few days and weeks, I have been taking shots at Glenn Beck, Keith Olbermann, Rachel Maddow, Sean Hannity, Tea Party protestors, and those who watch them in order to determine what they should think.

I announced on Thursday September 10th, that I had had enough with these dullards and was determined to form an effective third political party.

My desire was to form a group that could counteract the stupidity that flows from the minds and mouths of the aforementioned morons.

I am still in the process of putting this idea into an entity of tangibility, but I have made progress. I have come up with the name of this political movement, and our basic purpose…

The Speleology Coalition.

“Matt-Man,” you ask, “what the hell is speleology?”

Speleology is the study of caves…and why have I named this movement after the study of caves?

Sure, some of you who have known me for awhile, may think it refers to a perverted desire of mine to be a caveman who engages in sex with hot Neanderthal chicks who, instead of having language capabilities and the ability to talk back, can only grunt.

As appealing as it would be to have sex with a chick who is unable complain, that is not the reason.

No my friends (and critics), my reason for choosing, The Speleology Coalition refers to the Allegory of the Cave set forth by Plato in Book VII of his epic work, The Republic.

No, I have not lost my mind, so stay with me…

In the Allegory of the Cave, Plato, who is writing in the persona of Socrates, describes a hypothetical situation in which people since childhood have been held prisoner in a cave.

Their arms and legs shackled; their heads stationary, gazing at a wall, they are forced to watch shadows of animals, humans and other material things being cast upon the cave wall through the cooperation of a blazing fire and people walking behind them.

To the prisoners, the shadows and accompanying noises and voices they hear, are to them, what comprises the “real world”.

To the incarcerated, the beclouded specters and muddled voices combine in concert to compose what is the, Symphony of the Real World in B Flat.

In 2009, Plato’s Cave Allegory is being put into practice. Millions of Americans are shackled to their couches watching the shadows of ignorance and unyielding ideology being played out on TV, while in the caves of their homes.

Millions more hear the muddled voices while in their cars as they listen to talk radio.

They are prisoners to a marionette show put on by self-aggrandizing, puffed up puppet masters who are pulling the strings of fear, intellectual incapacity, and herd mentality.

This modern day, cave staged, Punch and Judy show, and the ensuing, go along-get along attitude towards it from the audience, is what feeds the lack of non-thinking realism to many, and gives this movement its purpose.

It is up to us as members of this organization to lead prisoners from their cave of shadows and fear.

It’s time to let the light of common sense and heated, yet respectful debate between those who agree and disagree, shine as a rainbow of humanity's evolution through the prism of informed personal discernment and social debate.

The 21st Century cave dwellers of whom I speak, need to realize something, and realize it quickly, lest we all lose...

In the words of Plato’s fellow Greek, Plutarch:

“I don't need a friend who changes when I change and who nods when I nod; my shadow does that much better.”

Glenn Beck, Rachel Maddow, Birthers, Truthers, Tea Baggers, et al., have become shadows of each other. A shadow does not think for itself. It follows blindly. But…

When light is shone from a point that has no angle one way or the other, and is straight up, a shadow dissipates, and a person is left with only him or herself.

It is at that point when actions and thoughts are the sole responsibility of the person in question.

It is also at that point, that no matter how painful and unfamiliar that intellectual soliloquy may be, a person must think for him or herself, and climb out of the cave.

Shining that light and being a catalyst for others in order to make that metamorphosis happen, is the purpose of this movement.

And for his wisdom, which is as ancient as the scorpion, I thank Plato.

However...

Unlike Plato, I am not calling for Philosopher Kings. I am calling for Philosopher Citizens.

I hope you join The Speleology Coalition and along with me, become a Spelunker.

Cheers!!