Happy Halloween

Happy Halloween Weekend kids!!

I am working alllll weekend. That’s right.

Today 11-9 and tomorrow 11-7. God has given me a purpose. Serve others…

Serve others lots and lots of beer.

Actually, it should be fun, and I will have my camera at the ready, as there might be some hot chicks dressed up as pirate wenches coming through.

As for me? I am working the Beer Mine dressed as a Priest today. I can’t wait to say to the kids when they come through with their parents:

“Hey little boy, would you like a sucker?”

Good times, good times.

Jay and I had our best, I'm With Stupid show ever last night. No technical difficulties and I have my phone issues solved. It went really well.

We had some wonderful people call in such as the uber-lovely Warrior Kat and a new caller who really stood out.

As always, Dour Mike called in, but then he passed the phone on to his wife. She…was…a…hoot!! Holy Cow!!

You can listen to our Halloween Extravaganza here:

Listen to internet radio with Im With Stupid on Blog Talk Radio

Thanks to all of you who listened in and called in.

And now…as I must get ready for work here are a couple of classic Inky and Lola cartoons that I did some three years ago…




And this one...


If you are going to a Halloween Party tonight, have fun, but first and foremost, don’t drink and drive.

See ya soon…

Cheers!!

Random Acts of Kindness

I came out of the shower just before going to work Thursday evening when Schmoop handed me a letter she had just gotten out of the mailbox.

It was from the Kroger Co., which if you don’t know, is a large grocery store chain.

I opened the letter, and inside was a 25 dollar gift card to the aforementioned Kroger’s. I said to Schmoop, “Wow, that’s nice!!”

Now…

In addition to my family, many of you chuckleheads have never failed to astound me with your generosity and thoughtfulness directed toward Schmoop and me over the past 4 plus years.

The likes of Lu, Dana, and Rat quickly come to mind, but this act of kindness was a bit different.

The card was sent anonymously and postmarked from an area of the country that offers me no clue as to who sent it.

I have no idea why it was sent either. Perhaps whoever sent it heard that my hours at The Beer Mine are getting cut a bit. Perhaps he or she was just being kind…perhaps both.

No matter, I am not one to look a gift card in the mouth. But…

I do want to thank the purveyor of this act of kindness and hope that your kindness is returned to you ten-fold. Thanks!!

And now…Another blatant, self-serving, promo for, I’m with Stupid!!

Please join Jay and me tonight at 11 PM EDT on Blog Talk Radio as we celebrate Halloween on I’m with Stupid.

Hilarity will ensue as we talk about all things Halloween related. From funny costumes, our favorite scary movies, madcap movie trailers, to Nipsey Russell’s take on football and Halloween!!

Help us welcome in the Halloween weekend by listening and calling in with your BOO-ty of wit and wisdom.

That’s, I’m With Stupid…Friday at 11 PM EDT. You can listen by going to our Blog Talk Radio page by clicking HERE.

And by the way?

Since I am off all day and will be quaffing more than a few beers, I may need a wake-up call at around 9:45 PM in order to make it to the show.

Your help would be greatly appreciated. If you don’t already have my number, email me, and I’ll send it along to ya.

I, and even more so, Jay, thank you in advance.

Have a ghoulishly fun Halloween weekend, and as always…

Cheers!!

My Charlie Sheen and Capri Anderson Moment

Were you expecting another fireworks filled installment between Schmoop and myself today in our weekly segment, He Said…She Said?

Well…

So was I. But…

When I woke up this morning to post it, I found that some drunken asshole evidently didn’t save the exchange.

Fucking moron.

This person needs to be severely reprimanded, publicly lynched, and then drenched in gasoline and set on fire.

Stupidity like this cannot and will not be tolerated, and it makes my job of providing daily frivolity to you the people, much harder to do.

This type of incompetence is unacceptable. So…

If any of you would like to come over and flog my stupid ass for not saving the post, I’ll be at home until 4:45 PM today.

I thank you in advance for punishing me for my Charlie Sheen/Capri Anderson moment.

On the upside…

I’m With Stupid after only nine shows, is already the number three rated comedy show on Blog Talk Radio!!

We attribute our success to many things…hard work, intensive show preparation, and the loyalty of our listeners, but mainly to dumb luck and labeling every show with the tag: Jewish Babes.

And…

This Friday (that’s tomorrow you chuckleheads) Jay and I will be making the I’m With Stupid magic happen once again as we broadcast on BTR at 11PM EDT.

We will be having our IWS Halloween Party. We will discuss Halloween party horror stories, our fave costumes, and our favorite scary movies.

Additonally, we will have our weekly football picks, Nipsey Russell and Dour Mike will probably be chiming in, and we have dug up several audio trailers of horror movies you may have missed out on.

We hope you listen and join the BOO-teelicious good times by calling in to our show.

That’s, I’m With Stupid at 11 PM EDT Friday night on Blog Talk Radio.

You can go to our BTR show page by clicking HERE.

And…

If you have a moment and are on Facebook, please go to our FB link on my right sidebar and “Like” us.

We want to be number one on BTR, on Facebook, and most importantly, number one in your hearts…or something.

Have a wunnerful Thursday and as always…

Cheers!!

Hump Day Hodgepodge

Happy Hump Day, Bitches!!

Many of you in the Midwest experienced some violent weather Tuesday and we did too. However…

While some areas near me got hammered, Bagwine proper did not suffer anything devastating.

I did shoot two minutes of the storm that passed through Bagwine as Drive-By Mikey and I were at the Beer Mine…



That was pretty much it. I was hoping for more meteorological excitement, but alas, it was not to be.

I’m off all day today, and you know what that means…Damn Right!! Drinking and Cooking!!

It is Chicken Shit night at the Bagwine Digs. I will be making my recent culinary invention once again and it will look, as it did the last time, something like this…

I may have a new twist. And, if the new twist meets Schmoop’s approval, there me be Hump Day sex in my future.

Today I will also be prepping hard with the Jayman in order to get this week’s installment of I’m With Stupid ready for our Friday night broadcast on Blog Talk Radio.

Friday night you say? That’s right, Bitches!!

Due to a change in my Beer Mine schedule, I’m With Stupid is moving to 11 PM EDT beginning this Friday October 29th.

Friday’s show will be our, I’m With Stupid Halloween Party.

We will have Halloween related movie promos for you, discuss our Halloween Party horror stories, and of course our weekly I’m with Stupid football picks which will include some college games this week.

We hope you will join us, listen in, and call-in to discuss all things Halloween such as the most creative and or funny costumes you or your friends have worn.

It will be ghoulish laughs galore, and blood curdling screams of hilarity this Friday at 11 PM EDT on, I’m With Stupid.

You can go to our Blog Talk Radio page by clicking: HERE.

And don’t forget kidz…As tomorrow is Thursday here on Bagwine Ruminations there will be another award-winning installment of, He Said…She Said.

Schmoop and I do so enjoy doing those. But…

As Jay and I have a short week to prepare our weekly radio nightmare, I must now bid you adieu.

Until tomorrow…

Cheers!!

Hump Day Hodgepodge: Thanks, Oops, And Halloween

It’s another Hodgepodgical Hump Day here at Bagwine Ruminations.

First up…I want to thank of all of you who left a comment, sent an e-mail, or even did an entire post (Jay-Man!!) in order to offer advice to my son and address his lack of effort in his first year of High School.

I printed your pearls of wisdom and personal stories off and put them into a nice, book type portfolio which was graciously stolen supplied by Schmoop.

The book looks very nice and the contents of each page are what make it an instant classic.

I gave the book to Ryan’s mom Tuesday morning so she could read it at work prior to handing it off to Ryan.

She gave it to him after work yesterday. He read each and every one your offerings, and in the words of his mom, “He was very touched.”

He was puzzled as to why people who do not know him would take the time to do such a thing, but his puzzlement became secondary.

Ryno’s mom, said that while he was reading it, he would periodically laugh, mostly looked thoughtful, and a couple of times his big brown eyes welled up. He likes it…a lot.

I was working so I didn’t get to talk to him very long, but he is already asking me about each of you.

I don’t know how effective your efforts will be upon him, but I do know he digs the thought, and Saturday we’ll talk more about what was written and I’ll let him know what a bunch of perverted psychopaths you all are.

I thank you all for helping me to reach through his thick head and wake that boy up. You’re all top notch.

I screwed up at work yesterday…

It was my first major one in the nearly 18 months since I’ve been working in the Beer Mine. A customer drove in and wanted a 12 pack of Non-Alcoholic beer. This person asked me what kind we had, and I said, “Old Milwaukee N/A.”

Well, the patron took said 12 pack from me, paid, and drove off. A few minutes later, I went to re-stock the Old Milk N/A, when I discovered something odd. There wasn’t one missing. Are ya seeing what happened?

I gave said customer REAL Old Milwaukee not the N/A version. Holy Cow…I may have messed this person up, because it was never returned.

I feel like I’m in the episode of Seinfeld when Jerry sat a drink down near Elaine’s alcoholic boyfriend at a Christmas party, the guy accidentally drank it, and fell off the wagon. Damn, I feel badly about it.

Speaking of work…Halloween Weekend? I am working ALL FUCKING WEEKEND!! Damn straight bitches. I’m closing Friday the 30th. Working 11A-9P on the 31st, and all day the following Sunday.

Boy I tell ya…When Mikey, Little Bill, and Pizza Bill screw someone they leave no doubt that they were there. Lousy Bastards!!

It does have its upside…There should be some scantily clad Halloween chicks coming through that night. I’ll make sure to take pictures.

I think I may dress up as well. I was thinking as going as a Priest. I need to be able to move around to do my job, so that might work pretty well.

I would like to dress up as Jeebus Christ but I worry about that.

What if towards the end of the night some already drunked up customer comes through and sees Jesus waiting on him or her, and freaks out?

That probably wouldn’t be good…Although it would be pretty God Damn funny. Let me re-think that idea.

Happy Hump Day, All!!

Cheers!!

October Observances

Wow…It’s October folks!!

Where did the year go?

Ha. Isn’t this about the time every year that people begin asking that annoying question?

I always feel compelled to reply to that question with the following answer:

I don’t know, maybe it went right up your ass, moron.

I know…I should calm myself. Anyhoo…October is a month full of Holidays and incredibly important observances.

In fact, today is the 55th B-Day for my brother Vince, and the 24th marks the 14th Birthday, of Ryno, my sweet, sarcastic son.

Of course, there is Halloween.

I think this year, Schmoop is going to wear a High School Cheerleader’s outfit with her stomach stuffed with a pillow, while I will have on a wig, breast implants, and a lobotomy scar.

Happy Halloween all, it’s Bristol and Sarah Palin!!

Columbus Day will be observed on Monday, October 13th this year…

A day when we honor Christopher Columbus for discovering an existing civilization that was fully aware of their own existence.

To honor this achievement, I will, on the night of the 12th, give myself the clap, and eat a meal of red beans and rice.

When I awake on the 13th , I will wipe away my Morning Drip with a map of the Dominican Republic, and wipe my ass clean of the red beans and rice with a map of Haiti. Very moving, no?

There are some other less well-known, but actual observances taking place this month as well.

If you love to read books about Tuberculosis, Beriberi, or Syphilis, give thanks because it is National Medical Librarians Month.

If you have ever hooked up jumper cables to your car and ended up with a face full of Elephant-Man inducing acid, it means you have probably never observed, Auto Battery Safety Month!!

John McCain is probably on cloud nine for next thirty-one days because October is also, Dinosaur Month.

I plan on getting together with today's Birthday Girl, Real Live Lesbian soon, and doing something sexually with her that will stand the test of time, in honor of Lesbian, Gay, and Bi-Sexual History Month!!

In addition to that excitement, I am on top of the world. Why? October is also, Sarcasm Awareness Month. Why in the Hell was I born in February!?

October, as many of you know, is Breast Cancer Awareness Month…

If you haven’t bothered ladies, get them boobies checked out. We need ya here, and healthy.

Lastly, I want to thank you all for the kind words yesterday in reference to my asking and Schmoop’s acceptance, of my marriage proposal.

You guys rock. If you’d like, swing by Schmoop’s place by clicking HERE and say congrats to her as well.

I’ll have your October Bagwine Whore-O-Scope ready for you all tomorrow.

Until then…

Cheers!!