Ticket To Rap

Well kids…The Democratic National Convention is about to get under way.

The big news however, is that Barack Obama has chosen Bagwine fave, Sen. Joe Biden, to be his running mate.

President Obama…Vice-President Biden. Nice ring, no? But, that’s nothing in the bigger scheme of life.

These two are more than just running mates for the nation’s highest political office.

These guys are a pair of ghetto-licious, rappin’ in your face, political bad asses.

Chocolate Lightning and Vanilla Thunder.

They’ve even changed their names. Obama is now, Jug Lobes O.


He’s clean, articulate, and his ginormous ears can pick up the sound of Clinton and her supporters whimpering from 50 miles away.

Joe Biden is now known as, Joe Bone Thug. He’s smart, sarcastic, and not afraid to tell you how wrong you are.

He’d be quite comfortable telling the Dalai Lama that he has a better chance of having sex with a yak than achieving a free and peaceful world.

Joe Bone Thug would also add, “Oh, and get rid of that table cloth you’re wearing, and put on some real clothes. You look like a frickin’ mental patient.”

Yes indeed, this duo is quite the hot commodity. Def Jam Records and Aftermath Music have been pursuing them with gusto.

I have scored the coup however. I have signed them to Bagwine Records. I have already had their Executive wannabe asses in the studio, and we cut three fine recordings.

The first one was "Red State Smackdown"…The second one…"I Gets My Blow in Precinct 3."

The last one we did and the first one to be released is this one…



Damn right…Hop on the JLO/JBT Express, bitches.

What’s John McCain doing while we are recording, in your face, no holds barred, rap?

Johnny Mac is cutting some lame-o country album with of all people, Pat “Pass me the Mayonnaise, and Toss the Crisp Salad” Boone. WTF?

I heard their first song is some piece of crap titled, “The Women All Get Prettier at Poll Closing Time.”

Pussies.

See folks; politics isn’t always boring when two Pimp Daddy politicians are on the campaign trail. Rock on boys, rock on…

Off to see the Little Man…Have a great Monday.

Cheers!!

Good Friday: Jesus Christ, Dead Man Laughing

It’s Good Friday so let’s have some laughs.

I mean, if we weren’t supposed to have fun on this Day of Jeebus’ Crucifixion, they would have called it something else.

Something such as, Bad Friday…Bloody Friday…or perhaps…

Is Your Fucked Up Sister Coming Over for Easter Dinner Again This Year? Friday.

Nope. It’s Good Friday, or as I refer to it, Holy Week Happy Hour™ So, drink up bitches, the laughs and Bagwine are on me.

As I have pointed out this week, Hayzoos was one funny Messianic Mo-Foe.

Facing certain death, did not dull JC’s spear tipped wit.

When the Romans came to escort him to his demise, he told them:

“I can’t go until I do LX Push-Ups and do my XXX minute Pontius Pilates workout, LOL. I wanna be able to push away that big stone later. LOL.”

And then Jeebus spoke to a couple of the Centurions:

“Hey boys, I had the strangest dream last night. God was speaking to me and kept calling me Moses.

I said, "Father, my name is Jesus, not Moses, yet God kept calling me Moses, Moses, Moses..."

I finally said to him, "My God, my God, why have you mistaken me? LOL."

Yeah baby, JC’s stand-up act was kickin’ ass to the end. He even turned his Heavenly Hilarity onto one of the condemning Rabbis:

“Yo, Rabbi, what’s the difference between a horny pig and a Pharisee? A horny pig eats pork. Bada Bing, Bitches. LOL.”

Once at Golgotha, and getting readied to be hung up, J-Mac entertained the crowd by doing one of his now famous Knock-Knock jokes…

Like the one he told to the onlookers, using Simon as his straight man:

Knock-Knock…Who’s There? God…God Who? Goddam this is gonna hurt!! LOL.

He brought the crowd down with that one and then had a request. He shouted to Andrew:

“Yo, ‘Drew-Dawg…Get this party started by throwing on some Crucifixion music. Throw on that song that I like so much.”

With that, Andrew played this, centuries later, Bagwine Classic:

After the Romans nailed JC to the cross, and firmly planted the crucifix into the hillside, Jeebus got in one last zinger:

“I’m just glad that the KKK has yet to be invented, because they’d set this crucifix on fire, and I’d end up with Hot Cross Buns. LOL”

And with that, the crowd laughed, Jeebus looked skyward, and simply said, “Tetelestai”.

And so it was…

I hope you have enjoyed Holy Week here at Bagwine Ruminations. Be safe, have fun, and enjoy your Easter Weekend.

Before I go to spend time with my son, I leave you with this classic Bagwine video…Matt-Man sings, The Resurrection.

Cheers!!

Sunday Morning Church Disservice: Palm Sunday...What Exactly Is It?

Raise your heads…Rejoice as One…Wave Your Palms…

Hayzoos is in the Bagwine Hizzy!!

It’s Palm Sunday...

A day to celebrate the triumphant entrance of Jebbus riding into Jerusalem on a Holy Ass.

Allow me to offer you a lesson in Judeo-Christian history.

Centuries ago, the denizens of J-Town waved and lay down palm frawns in honor of the Son of that Great Muckity Muck in the Sky.

This palm frenzy thing is much the same way that people in Palestine used to honor Dionysus eons before the arrival of Jeebus.

I have a soft spot in my heart for Dionysus as he is the god of wine. There are many similarities between The Big D and The Big J.

Ressurection, association with wine, eating the flesh and blood…

Of course, Dionysus, unlike Jeebus, was just a myth and in no way whatsoever, influenced the beliefs of the people of JC’s time. No, really.

As Jeebus sat on his ass through the palm strewn roads, the masses waved their palms in deference to his kingliness.

They also waved them because on this day, it was hotter and steamier than Marlon Brando’s ass crack.

And trust me, standing next to a sweaty Jew who has just eaten mutton and bitter herbs is no place to be.

Anyhoo, the Nazarean, waved to the crowds as he trotted through.

Shriners were zippin’ around on wee, tiny chariots pulled by rats.

Lepers, dressed as clowns, cavorted up and down lines of celebrants, tossing their skin and body parts to the kids.

The palm toting crowd smiled and clapped their hands in approval.

Music was provided by the 200 strong, Marching Pharisees Drum and Shofar Corps.

Directly behind them, was a horse drawn flat bed carrying a huge, colorful crucifix made out of papyrus mache’.

Pageantry and foreshadowing abound on the streets of Jerusalem that day.

After the parade, Jeebus, his 12 homies, and Mary Magdalene got together, planned the menu for the Last Supper, and filled out their March Madness™ brackets.

And that my friends, is what really happened on the first Palm Sunday. I hope this information was helpful as well as spiritual.

Amen, and Amen…

And now, our Sunday Serenade…In honor of the return of the Messiah to Jerusalem, I offer you a Bagwine classic.

Matt-Man sings, Nazarean Dandy©. Now, I am off to visit Ryno. Enjoy your Sunday.

Cheers!!



If you can, tune into Turnbaby's Blog Talk Radio Show tonight at 8 EDT. For details, or just to say Hi to TB, click HERE.

Note: Don't worry Vinny; You'll have it sometime today...

Merry Christmas From Bagwine Records

Grandpa got his herpes from a reindeer
Coming home last year on Christmas Day
Please don’t be too hard on poor old Grandpa
The reindeer got him drunk, and had her way

I guess there was at least one witness
Who saw the carnage, and the grief
Said, there were hooves and arms a’flyin’
And Grandpa, eating venison without his teeth

He said it soon became a three way
As the deer she got on top
She was a grindin’ on Grandpa’s Yule log
While her tongue was makin’ love to a big salt block

Grandpa got his herpes from a reindeer
Coming home last year on Christmas Day
Please don’t be too hard on poor old Grandpa
The reindeer got him drunk, and had her way

And now the worst part of the story
Grandma’s drowning in her tears
‘Cause this year at our holiday table
Sits a yearling with doe-y eyes and Grandpa’s ears

Grandpa got his herpes from a reindeer
Coming home last year on Christmas Day
Please don’t be too hard on poor old Grandpa
The reindeer got him drunk, and had her way

For today's biting social commentary, scroll down. Cheers!!

Inky and Lola: O Tannenbaum!!

The Bagwine abode isn’t really big enough for a Christmas Tree, but I do like to keep it festive. I put a few lights here, a candle there, and a few tacky knick knacks on the table next to the chair. This year, however, I was really missing not having a tree.

Fortunately, the spirit of Christmas, and the after effects of too much Wild Irish Rose spoke to me in a dream last night. The somnolent whispers offered up an idea on how I could make a Christmas Tree.

I forcefully, and without their knowledge lovingly took the parts of Inky and Lola and redesigned them into a beautiful Christmas Tree. It’s a tree that I hope you will enjoy as much as I do. I know that Inky and Lola are happy to help bring a little holiday cheer to all of the Bagwine readers.

So please, scroll down and enjoy our Bagwine Tree...

(click on cartoon to enlarge)

I have a few things to do with Ryno this morning and when I get back I will be working on a couple of new Christmas music videos for you. One deals with the sacrifice and separation incurred by our military folks who are serving in Iraq and Afghanistan.

The other tune is a little less joyful. It is a song about a man and woman engaged in a night of hot, sweaty, Christmas passion. The passion and a manufacturer’s defect result in unintended and unfortunate consequences for the couple when the condom busts. The song is titled, “I Came Inside You at Midnight Dear.”

I truly enjoy bringing my songs and videos to you. It makes me feel closer to you, my beloved Bagwine family. If you are a new Bagwine reader, or may have missed some of my previous tunes you can click HERE, and that will take you to my You Tube site.

Enjoy your Saturday, and I’ll be around later.

Cheers!!

Matt-Man's Winter Wonderland

There are many different joys that I experience during the Christmas Season, none more profound and satisfying as enjoying playing in a Winter Wonderland. I would like to share with you this brief musical interlude that descibes that feeling.

This rendention of Winter Wonderland is dedicated to Odat (link here) who has awarded me a Pajama Award because I make her feel warm and fuzzy, especially when I am wearing my red robe. So to Odat and all of you...Please enjoy me singing my version of Winter Wonderland...

Cheers!!

Snow’s been fallin’ quite a while’n
The Mailman’s here now I’m smilin’
He brought my copy of “Screw”
The Christmas issue
Strokin’ in a Winter Wonderland

My balls are screamin’ are ya listenin’
And my tally whacker’s glistenin’
But my magazine came
Now I’ll do the same
Strokin’ in a Winter Wonderland

In my bedroom I’ll be slapping Spanky
Eyeing naked girls on every page
The layout of the five chicks in the manger
Makes every minute seem like Christmas Day

When I’m done, I’ll start over
As I lay on the covers
Play with my boys in my bed
Unlike toys, there’s no lead
Strokin’ in a Winter Wonderland

Matt-Man Sings "The Rose"

I hope that all of you enjoy this song as much as I loved bringing it to you. Enjoy, and don't be ashamed if you feel a bit of a tear wafting down your cheek.

Cheers!!

Lindsay Roberts: Young Boys Are Smoking!!

In a continuing effort to video catalog my songs so that future generations may appreciate my profound coolness and wisdom, I am posting yet another Bagwine Hit today.

Today’s is a recent classic that focuses on allegations made about Oral Roberts’ daughter-in-law Lindsay Roberts, involving misusing Oral Roberts University monies, late night text messages to young boys, smoking with them, and of course my favorite, having SEX with a 16 year old boy.

If you want more details you can visit a post I made on this subject by clicking HERE. With that being said, please sit back, sing along if you’d like, and enjoy Matt-Man singing that Bagwine Records hit….“Lindsay”.

Who spreads her legs for underage Okies

Who's texting boys at quarter til' three

Whose sexcapades give Matt tons of hits now

Everyone knows it's Lindsay

Who's holy-rollin' inside the guest house

Signs of stigmata bleed from her knees

Who's screaming, "Lord, please take me, I'm coming."

Everyone knows it's Lindsay

And Lindsay will save your soul

Just fill her collection bowl

It's your Highway to Heaven toll

So hop on board (So hop on board)

You'll see the Lord (You'll see the Lord)

Skin Flute Solo:
La La la la la Matthew and Mark
La La la la la Luke and John
La La la la la Lovin’ that Peter
La La la la la Lindsay

Who's makin' Swaggart look like a pansy

Who does Mark Foley call for advice

Who gives the boys Evangelical candy

Everyone knows it's Lindsay

And Lindsay will save your soul
Provided you’re not too old
Kneel down to her Glory Hole
And then hop on board
You’ll see the Lord….

Praise Jeeezus, enjoy your day, and of course, Cheers!!

Matt-Man Sings...Children Cry

Back for another dose of the Singin' Matt-Man? Take a listen to the song that is climbing the charts with a spear...Nazarean Dandy!!

I’m a Nazarean dandy A Nazarean who will die A real live walking, talking Son of God Born on December Twenty-Five

Some Jews and Romans want to kill me Because my daddy is the boss This Nazarean came to town Riding on a donkey The bastards they hung me from a cross

Im a Nazarean dandy A Nazarean who has died Betrayed by the kiss from some Judas prick While my buddy Peter denied

Some Jews and Romans thought they’d killed me When they put me in that deep crevasse This Nazarean moved the rock I sang and walked awaaaay You all can kiss my Christian ass

Cheers!!

Matt-Man...Givin' The Gift Of Music

Due to the tepid overwhelming response to my You Tube video production of "The Resurrection" on yesterday's post, I will be posting yet another Bagwine Records classic later today.

Until then, keep the beat, and Cheers!!

Matt-Man Goes You Tube...

Since the Writers' strike may impede amusement in the near future, I am offering this video for your enjoyment. It is my first upload to You Tube. Enjoy watching me as I sing that classic Bagwine Records hit...The Resurrection.

Cheers!!

Everybody's doin' a brand new dance now (C'mon baby do the Resurrection)
It’s Son of God approved
So give it a chance now (C'mon baby do the Resurrection)
It’s pissin’ off the Romans and the Pharisees
It's easier than learning your I X Vees
So come on, come on, Do the Resurrection with me

You gotta die on a cross now
Come on baby, jump up, hmmm get nailed
In three days you’ll begin to inhale
Whoaaa whoa

Now that you can do it
Let's make a Church now (C'mon baby do the Resurrection)
Gen-U Gen-U Flection in the Cath-O-Lic Church now (C'mon baby do the Resurrection)
Drop the Jewish attitude now just let it go
The spreadin’ of the Gospel takes a lot of dough

So come on, come on,
Do the Resurrection
Come on, come on
Do the Resurrection with me…

Richard and Lindsay Roberts: The Love Gift That Keeps On Giving

The number of hits I have gotten because of writing about Lindsay Roberts' campaign to save souls and to introduce underage boys to God's Grotto of Gomorrah continues to astound me. I feel that I need to thank her, and what better way to do that than penning a heartfelt song in her honor?


Ladies and Gentlemen,


To the tune of "Windy" by The Association, I give you, "Lindsay"...

Who spreads her legs for underage Okies
Who's texting boys at quarter til' three
Whose sexcapades give Matt tons of hits now
Everyone knows it's Lindsay


Who's holy-rollin' inside the guest house
Signs of stigmata bleed from her knees
Who's screaming, "Lord, please take me, I'm coming."
Everyone knows it's Lindsay


Chorus: And Lindsay will save your soul
Just fill her collection bowl
It's your Highway to Heaven toll
So hop on board (So hop on board)
You'll see the Lord (You'll see the Lord)

[skin flute solo]

Who's makin' Swaggart look like a pansy
Who does Ted Haggard call for advice
Who gives the boys Evangelical candy
Everyone knows it's Lindsay (chorus)

Once again thanks to Lindsay Roberts and the "fine" folks at Oral Roberts University for their comedic value and to those over at icanhascheezburger.com for the topical picture of the praying pussy.

To the rest of you, Cheers!!

Let's Get Jiggy With Jesus

If you read my post this past Thursday you are aware that I have converted to Bagorian Islam. However, since today is the Sabbath for my readers of the Christian persuasion, I am re-releasing the big dance hit that I wrote for Little Eva and the Tomb Raiders this past Lenten season...Enjoys today's church service.

THE RESURRECTION

Everybody's doin' a brand new dance now
(C'mon baby do the Resurrection)
It’s Son of God approved
So give it a chance now
(C'mon baby do the Resurrection)

It’s pissin’ off the Romans and the Pharisees
It's easier than learning your I X Vees
So come on, come on,
Do the Resurrection with me

You gotta die on a cross now
Come on baby, jump up, hmmm get nailed
In three days you’ll begin to inhale

Whoaaa whoa

Now that you can do it
Let's make a Church now
(C'mon baby do the Resurrection)
Gen-U Gen-U Flection in the Cath-O-Lic Church now
(C'mon baby do the Resurrection)

Drop the Jewish attitude, now just let it go
The spreadin’ of the Gospel takes a lot of dough
So come on, come on,
Do the Resurrection
Come on, come on
Do the Resurrection with me…

Bagwine Notes:

“Please Visit Dixie and Matt and Wish Them Well As He Leaves For Parris Island And The Marines today. Just click HERE.”

Our friend Turnbaby is kicking off her Blogtalk radio show tonight at 6:30 PM EDT. Make sure to listen and call in if you can. For Details Click HERE.

CHEERS!!

Everyone Knows It's Lindsay

Music Stolen Without Permission From The Association's Version of "Windy"

Who's sneakin’ out while drowning in Vodka

Who’s passed out in the car on TV

Whose parent’s make George Bush look like Einstein

Everyone knows it's Lindsay

Who's swerving down the streets of the city

Smashing her car into a big tree

Who's reachin' down to hide her cocaine now

Everyone knows it's Lindsay

And Lindsay loves gulpin’ gin
A busty young Mel Gibson

Without all that Jew-Hatin’

She drives her car (but not very far)

She drives her car (but not very far)

Who's checkin in for more of that rehab
Takin’ the place of dear old Dad-Dee
Who’s only 20 with the liver of Matt-Man
Everyone knows it’s Lindsay

La la la laaa la la la la la laaa everyone knows it’s Lindsay

Cheers!!

Tying Up Loose Ends

As I am tying up some loose ends this week, I will continue with the re-runs until Stream of Consciousness Friday. Tension between the Palestinians and Israelis are in the news again And it reminded me of a post I wrote back on July 27, 2006 when the Israelis went after Hezbollah in Lebanon. Enjoy and Cheers!!

As Tom Lehrer, is one of my faves, I have used the melody of his wonderful song, “The Vatican Rag” to accompany a summation of the current Israeli/Lebanese conflict. Hopefully, it will offer hope to some, and give a bit of a ragtime “feel good” to the whole event…Ladies and Gentlemen:The Lebanese Rag

Missiles raining, choppers hover
Don’t be ashamed, just duck and cover
Blame it on Hasan Nasrallah,
And Hezbollah, Hezbollah, Hezbollah!

Israeli soldiers, they were kidnapped
Now you’re sitting in a death trap
Gee you better hollah
“Save my ass Allah!!”
Doin' the Lebanese Rag.

The Jews are pissed and want to smite you
They think “By God” they’ve got the right to
Tanks are rolling all the night thru
The IDF just bombed a news crew.
Lock your door, there’s death among us
Drink the tea and eat your hummus
Two, four, six, eight,Watch Beirut disentigrate!

Missiles raining, choppers hover
Don’t be ashamed, just duck and cover
Blame it on Hasan Nasrallah,
And Hezbollah, Hezbollah, Hezbollah!

Try a bagel, it’s not voodoo
When attacked; do like the Jew do
Say, "I love Moses,
Gee, it's good to knows ya."
Then you’ll be free again, next to the sea again
Doin' the Lebanese Rag.

And Now…Our Moment of Hinn…

Sitting for Benny, Pastor of the World Harvest Church, Rod Parsley:

"Some of you are standing there like you ain't got no trouble. I saw what you drove here in. Don't tell me you ain't got no trouble." --Pastor Rod Parsley

Bagwine Records Presents:

Ooh my little Jewish one, Jewish one.

Always changin’ water into wine, Messiah.

Ooh you’re turning on the nuns, all the nuns.

They’re swooning ‘cause they think you’re so divine, Messiah

You’re the people’s shepherd. Cure the leper. Give vision to the blind.
Folks are lining up for your touch, of the holy kind.
My my my i yi woo. M M M My Messiah...

Were you hosing Magdalene, Ms. Magdalene?

Did you two horny Jews procreate, Messiah?

Or when you got a swollen gland, ya used your hand

You know you shouldn’t masterbaaate, Messiah

You’re the people’s shepherd. Cure the leper. Don’t you dare wait.

Folks are lining up for your touch, don’t you dare be late.
My my my i yi woo. M M M My Messiah...

Are you gonna strike me dead, strike me dead?

Is it just a matter of time, Messiah?

Can’t ya just let me be, let me be?

Or do I hear the death bell chime, Messiah?
You’re the people’s shepherd. Cure the leper. Give vision to the blind.

Folks are lining up for your touch, please refrain from swine.
My my my i yi woo. M M M My Messiah...

Wow that was a tough one to do!! I am sure that The Almighty will not let my efforts go unnoticed. I think I am beginning to grow on him. Cheers!!

Damn You Travis!!

I have been tagged by Travis to fill out this meme. While not a big fan of filling out memes (mainly because of the word “meme”) I have duly filled it out, because Trav is very, very sensitive.

LIST FOUR SENTENCES YOU'VE NEVER SAID BEFORE:

1. Eating meat is so disgusting.
2. No thanks, I’ve had enough Wild Irish Rose for the evening.
3. I have great confidence in President Bush.
4. Let’s go to the opera!!

LIST ANY NUMBER OF SONG TITLES THAT DESCRIBE HOW YOU'VE FELT THIS WEEK:

1. Ball of Confusion, The Temptations
2. Poisoning Pigeons in the Park, Tom Lehrer
3. The Roto-Rooter Ad Jingle, Captain Stubby and the Buccaneers

IMAGINE YOU'RE HAVING THE IDEAL PERFECT DAY. WHAT FOUR THINGS WOULD YOU BE DOING?

1. Wake up and have a plateful of sage sausage ready for my consumption.
2. Read in the newspaper that Joe Biden is our new President.
3. Drink copious amounts of Wild Irish Rose.
4. End the day by eating greasy bratwursts in bed with a sexy Swedish deaf mute bikini model.

MAKE UP FIVE CREATIVE NAMES FOR A NEW ROCK BAND:

1. Not Nearly As Good As Ezra
2. Tainted Spinach
3. Grandmasterbater Flash and the Funky Five
4. Rotten Salami
5. Soccer Moms On Meth

CONGRATULATIONS! YOU GET TO GO BACK IN TIME AND ENSURE THAT THREE SONGS WERE NEVER WRITTEN, THUS SPARING HUMANITY FROM EVER HAVING TO HEAR THEM. WHAT THREE SONGS WOULD GET THE AXE?

1. Sugar Shack, Recorded by Jimmy Gilmer and The Fireballs
2. Muskrat Rat Love, Captain and Tenille
3. You Take My Breath Away, Rex Smith

Now, if would like to read the lyrics to a great song, scroll down for Bagwine Records latest Lenten release. See you all tomorrow for Stream of Consciousness Friday…Cheers!!

Another Bagwine Lenten Toe-Tapper

I hope you enjoy this new record as much as I enjoyed producing it for you....Cheers!!

I’m a Nazarean dandy
A Nazarean who will die
A real life walking, talking Son of God
Born on December Twenty-Five

Some Jews and Romans want to kill me
Because my daddy is the boss
This Nazarean came to town
Riding on a donkey
The bastards they hung me from a cross

Im a Nazarean dandy
A Nazarean who has died
Sold out by the kiss from some Judas prick
While his buddy Peter denied

Some Jews and Romans thought they’d killed me
When they stuffed me in that big crevasse
This Nazarean moved the rock
He sang and walked awaaaay
You all can kiss my Christian ass

Have a great day folks. Only 11 days to go and I am eating an entire fattened calf!!

Bagwine Records: A New Lenten Dance Craze

Well folks, this is it. Tomorrow morning I will be flying to Washington for my nephew’s wedding this weekend. I have my bag packed with my clothes. I also have all the essentials such as aspirin, Tums, razors, and personal lubricant…I mean hand cream toothpaste, yeah that’s it, toothpaste.

I hope you all have an enjoyable time this weekend, and please pray that my plane doesn’t crash or get hijacked to Alabama. I will be back on Tuesday the 27th with all of the highlights and low lights of the fracas.

Until then, enjoy the new release from Bagwine Records below and as always…CHEERS!!

Hot off the presses, Bagwine Records presents the following Number I Hit:

Everybody's doin' a brand new dance now
(C'mon baby do the Resurrection)
It’s Son of God approved
So give it a chance now
(C'mon baby do the Resurrection)
It’s pissin’ off the Romans and the Pharisees
It's easier than learning your I X Vees
So come on, come on,
Do the Resurrection with me

You gotta die on a cross now
Come on baby, jump up, hmmm get nailed
In three days you’ll begin to inhale

Whoaaa whoa

Now that you can do it
Let's make a Church now
(C'mon baby do the Resurrection)
Gen-U Gen-U Flection in the Cath-O-Lic Church now
(C'mon baby do the Resurrection)
Drop the Jewish attitude now just let it go
The spreadin’ of the Gospel takes a lot of dough
So come on, come on,
Do the Resurrection
Come on, come on
Do the Resurrection with me…

Oh yeah baby, I am so going to Hell, and if you laughed at this, so are you. Until Tuesday my friends, shake your tail feather, and Cheers!!

Sundry Items and Hot Wax

T-Minus 52 hours until I fly the friendly skies to Washington, D.C. I still need to get some items for the trip. Later today, I will let you in on some of my preparations and advise you as to what items I picked up at the drug store for my trip.

My keyboard play is coming along famously. Last night I knocked out a version of “Muffin Man” that will soon be a classic. I may even use it as my theme song when I get back on stage in four-six months. Until this afternoon, enjoy the newest Lenten release from Bagwine Records…Cheers.

Tonight's Meatless Lenten Menu: Black Beans with Salsa and Sour Cream